"Do you want to see?" I asked, with a slight smile.
"Yes." said Nora, before I could answer. For the first time, her curiosity overcame her shyness. It really made me smile.
I sat down between the two of them, slowly opening the book. The pages were filled with meticulous drawings of flowers - delicate strokes that I had made myself, in the few moments of peace I had. Nora and Vera watched intently, their eyes shining in silence. As I showed them the drawings, they asked me questions, almost whispering, and I answered calmly, as if I wanted to eternalize that moment.
It wasn't long before they both fell asleep right there, leaning against me. I covered them both with a blanket and, without having the courage to leave, I lay down between them. The room was silent, except for the quiet sound of their breathing.
The next morning, when I opened my eyes, the first thing I saw were their serene faces. They were sleeping soundly, as if they were dreaming of something good. That sight... for some reason, brought me a calm that I hadn't felt for a long time.
(I shouldn't hate women.) The thought suddenly came to me, as if my mind wanted to remind me of it even before I fully woke up. (I just need to be smarter. Everything that happened was because I was too naive. I need to learn, evolve... and make sure it never happens again.)
As I reflected, I slowly ran my hand over their scalps. It was then that they stirred. They looked at me with sleepy eyes and, as soon as they sat up, they lowered their heads, as if embarrassed.
I only realized then: my morning erection was visible under the blanket. Both of their gazes fell on it, even involuntarily. They blushed, not knowing how to react. And neither did I.
"Big brother... is there anything I can do for you?" Nora asked, her voice low and soft. It was remarkable how much she had opened up to me since the night before.
Her words, spoken so sweetly, almost made me lose control. But I couldn't. I shouldn't have.
"Nora, bring some water so I can wash my face. Vera, please prepare the bathtub."
I spoke firmly, but carefully. Simple, safe tasks. I knew they were used to domestic chores. Even so, I saw the fright on their faces. They got out of bed almost in a panic, rushing out of the room to do what I asked.
Only then did I let out the air trapped in my lungs. The two of them had been sent to me as "gifts", as if I were some kinds of lord whom they needed to serve in every way. But they were young... and they weren't there by choice. I knew that. And above all, my sense of right and wrong wouldn't let me cross certain lines.
More than that... I had understood how intimate the sexual act was. Having done it with anyone in the past, without ties, without meaning, had torn me apart inside. I felt empty, torn between what was expected of me and what I really wanted.
As much as I had the power to do whatever I wanted with them, I chose control. The truth was that the night before, I had been too tired to wash - which was unusual, as I had always made a habit of cleaning myself before bed.
I got up and went to the open window. The morning breeze hit my face, fresh, clean. I rested my hand on the stone ledge and looked down. From above, I saw the inner courtyard of the castle, where my father's soldiers were already in training. They were all wearing their new armor - made of purple iron, as it was called because of the whitish metallic sheen with bluish tones that reflected purple light.
They wielded huge polearms and tower shields, adjusting to the weight of the armor. They were getting used to the new routine. The number of complete sets had already exceeded one hundred. One hundred pieces of armor forged in just twelve years and five months... since the day I was born.
It was an impressive feat. Making armor of that level required dozens of blacksmiths, rare materials and dedication. But each of those men would become a living wall in battle.
(My body is growing with a solid foundation.) I thought. (but I have no idea how to reach the level of a Combat Master. There are no books, masters or clear paths. My ancestors got there only through trial and error, through experience accumulated over the years.)
But I wasn't intimidated. The title of Combat Master was the pinnacle of strength in this world - and I was already a commander, even at just twelve years old. My body was getting stronger every day.
"How curious..." I muttered to myself. "If nobles have a maximum of five Combat Masters in their families, how does the Royal House of the Dawn Empire maintain its dominance?"
The question hung in the air, unanswered. And then another thought crossed my mind:
"Is there such a thing as the Light of Life in this world?"
The Light of Life... a mysterious power that was said to be always present, capable of amplifying the strength of humans. Everyone talked about it, but no one knew its origin. No book, no study, no explanation. Just myths.
(Maybe I don't know anything about the truth of this world.)
That's when I felt it. As if there was an invisible layer of glass between me and the real thing. Something was preventing me from seeing what was really behind things. I felt that the world I knew was just the surface... a curtain.
(How do kings control nobles? How does royal power stand, even in the face of such balanced forces?)
The questions piled up in my mind, and I knew - the world seemed deeper than I had imagined.
Crueler.
More beautiful.
More dangerous.
***
Inside the castle's training square, I took a deep breath. The cold morning air entered my lungs, and my hands wrapped tightly around the metal bar in front of my feet.
Ranger!
I lifted the weight slowly, feeling every muscle in my legs and arms tense up like steel ropes. Veins popped out of my skin, tracing paths from my ankles to my shoulders. The weight was set at three hundred kilos - and yet my body held everything firmly.
I stood there for a few seconds, maintaining my posture, sweat dripping down my temple.
Clank!
I dropped the bar to the ground, the metallic echo spreading across the empty square. The muscles were still cold, rigid, vibrating inside as if my own flesh were on alert. I stretched my back slowly, feeling the pressure ease for a moment.
(Another ten kilos...) I thought, watching the bar for a moment. (My strength has increased again.)
It was slow but steady progress. And in this world, constancy was a weapon as sharp as a blade.
It was still early. School wouldn't start until hours later, and my training routine was already complete. I sighed, wiping my sweat with a towel hanging over the edge of the bleachers.
(How long has it been since I ate with my family?) I asked myself, with a strange weight on my chest. The truth was that I could hardly remember the last time I had sat at the table with them. It was no wonder my brothers treated me like a stranger.