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Chapter 38 - Self-denial

"Hey, where are you going?"

I heard his voice behind me as I stormed down the stairs.

I didn't bother turning around, my face twisted in disgust.

"Somewhere," I muttered.

What a stupid question. Of course I was going home. Where else would I go after hearing something so diabolical?

Attached?

To Kenan, of all people?

"I'm pretty sure it's illegal to follow someone without their consent," I snapped, still walking, still not looking at him.

At the intersection, I pulled out my phone and typed a quick message to my father.

"What if we're heading to the same place?" he asked.

I finally turned to face him and there he was, close behind, his chest rising and falling like he'd jogged to catch up.

"What do you want?" I asked sharply.

"Shouldn't we talk?"

I rolled my eyes. "Talk about what? Don't you think we did enough of that in front of Isabella?"

He hesitated."It concerns our health, Ciro."

Oh,now you're concerned?

"You're acting like it's life-threatening." I scoffed, stepping off the curb as the light turned green.

He followed, of course.

I sighed. "Fine. You want to talk? Let's talk."

I turned on my heel and faced him fully this time.

"I have no model. Leone and I—we didn't finish it. I've already failed. Even if I begged for an extension, there's no way I could recreate it in time. It took weeks."

My voice cracked. "My grades... everything I've worked for... it's all going to crash and burn."

"I said I'd help you," Kenan repeated.

"It's too late!" I shouted. "And this whole attachment thing why did it have to be you?"

He looked stunned.

"And let's not even get into the fact that after you kissed me, you disappeared. Not a word. Just gone. Like it didn't matter."

He opened his mouth, but I cut him off.

"You know what? I don't think we should talk right now."

I walked away before he could say anything else. My feet carried me straight home. Back to my parents—the people I hadn't seen since the start of this semester. Or maybe... since the start of this mess.

The plate in front of me barely had a dent in it. I poked at the food, appetite nonexistent.

How did I end up in such a mess? Everything was going fine. Better than fine.

"Is something bothering you, Ciro?" my father asked from across the table.

I didn't even look up. "Just... not feeling well."

That, apparently, caught his attention. "So what did Dr. Soren say?"

I sucked my teeth, debating whether to lie. But he'd find out anyway. Whether I said it or not.

"So... I've formed an attachment," I said slowly, my voice barely above a whisper.

Instant silence. My father looked up, and both my sisters turned toward me with interest.

"With who?" he asked.

"The alpha I was paired with for the project."

"Who's the alpha?"

I toyed with my food, delaying the inevitable.

"Kenan... Soren," I mumbled.

"What? I didn't hear you."

I sighed, louder this time. "Kenan Soren."

A stifled laugh came from the corner. I glared at my younger sister.

"When did this happen?"

"Isabella didn't give me an exact date. She said it was probably because we've been around each other so much."

"Do you like him, Ciro?" my dad asked.

The question caught me off guard. My voice pitched up. "Of course not!"

"You don't have to get so defensive," my younger sister teased, with my older sister nodding in agreement.

"Attachments don't form based on feelings alone," she added.

They all looked at me like I was lying.

I wasn't.

"I swear—" I stood abruptly. "I'm not feeling well. I don't think I can eat."

The second I stepped into my room, silence swallowed me whole. Heavy and familiar, like the walls remembered every past meltdown I'd had here.

I flopped face-first onto the bed, the scent of sun-dried laundry and cinnamon wrapping around me. It was supposed to be comforting. It wasn't. It just made me feel like a kid again—helpless and small.

Attached? To Kenan, of all people?

The universe must really hate me.

I curled my fingers into the blanket. That word wouldn't stop echoing in my head. Why him? Why not someone... normal? Someone who could actually talk to me? Someone who didn't vanish after kissing me?

Was it really just biology? Or was I just that desperate?

A soft knock interrupted my spiral.

I didn't answer. Maybe they'd leave.

They didn't.

The door creaked open slightly. "You're back."

It was my sister. Camilla.

I rolled over slowly and offered a small smile.

"You look tired," she said, slipping into the room and taking a seat beside me.

"That's because I am. I'm going to fail a course. Not even finals can fix that."

"You'll be okay."

"No, I won't. My model's in the hospital and the project's due tomorrow. I don't know what to do."

"Ask for an extension?"

"As if they'd understand."

"They might."

There was a beat of silence.

"So," she said, "you formed an attachment, huh?"

"Wow. Way to change the topic."

"I mean... it just happened? And you really don't like him?"

"I don't."

She raised a brow.

I sighed. "Maybe a little. I don't know."

"What are you going to do about the attachment?"

"What can I do?"

"Stop denying your feelings."

"I'm not denying anything."

"You're telling me that being childhood rivals, then college project partners, then ending up attached—doesn't sound like a romance novel?"

"Nothing is romantic about it," I muttered.

"I'd pay to watch it."

"Anyway," I said, shifting away, "I told him I don't want to talk right now."

"Don't you have to stick close to him, though? Isn't that how it works?"

"Yeah. First I was forced to work with him because of my grade. Now it's because of my trait."

I stared up at the ceiling.

"Pinch me, Camilla."

Instead of my hand, she pinched my cheek. Hard.

"OW! Are you serious?!"

"Is it real now, Ciro?" she grinned.

"It is!" I rubbed my cheek, scowling.

"You guys should at least talk. Aren't you on break for a week?"

"Yeah."

"Plenty of time to sort it out."

"I don't want to."

She gave me The Stare. The eldest sister look .

"He's confusing and impossible to talk to."

"Still... if you don't talk to him, you're going to keep feeling this way."

She nudged me. "And frankly? You look horrible."

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