They say your life flashes before your eyes in the final moments. Mine didn't.
I only saw him, Zhao Rui.
He stood above me, dressed in golden robes, his face calm as he gave the order. His voice was the last thing I heard before the blade fell.
"Execute the traitor."
The pain was sharp, then nothing. Darkness swallowed me whole.
But I didn't die.
Or rather… I did. And now, I've returned.
When my eyes opened again, I thought I was in some kind of afterlife.
The room around me glowed with soft light. Red silk curtains danced in the breeze. Lanterns lit every corner, and the faint scent of peonies filled the air. I knew this room. I had slept here once, long ago.
But that couldn't be right.
Then I heard the sound of rushing footsteps.
"The bridal robes! Where are the bridal robes?"
"She's still asleep? Oh no, she cannot be late!"
Bridal robes?
I sat up quickly. My heart pounded. I looked down at my hands, they were smooth, young, unmarked by time. No wrinkles. No scars from the palace struggles.
I scrambled to the mirror.
My breath caught.
It was me. But not the me who died. This was the seventeen-year-old me, still untouched by pain, still hopeful. My eyes were rounder, my face softer. I touched my cheek just to be sure.
I had returned to the past.
The door opened, and maids hurried in. One of them gasped when she saw me sitting up.
"Your Grace, you're awake! Thank the heavens," she said with relief.
Another quickly held out a tray of jewelry. "We must dress you quickly. His Majesty awaits."
His Majesty.
My stomach turned at the words.
That man… that cruel man… was waiting to marry me again.
Zhao Rui, the man I had loved and trusted. The man who smiled gently at me during morning court, who touched my hand softly when no one was watching. The man who looked into my eyes and said he would protect me.
He had been the one to kill me.
I clenched my hands into fists, trying to stop the shaking. I remembered it too clearly.
The cold dungeon floor. The blood on my clothes. The laughter of Consort Mei. The silence of the ministers. And Zhao Rui, standing above me, his empty expression.
I had begged him with my eyes. I didn't ask for mercy, I asked for the truth. But he had turned away.
Now I was back. Back on the day of our wedding.
"Is something wrong, Your Grace?" one of the maids asked gently.
I blinked and forced myself to smile. "No. Just… a little nervous."
Nervous? That wasn't the word. I was furious. Terrified. But I had to hide it.
They dressed me in layer after layer of red silk. The phoenix crown sat heavy on my head. I felt like a doll, painted and wrapped to be handed over.
Last time, I had smiled. I had believed in love.
This time, I stayed quiet.
Madam Lin, my old nursemaid, stepped forward. She touched my arm gently.
"Don't be afraid, child. You will live a good life. His Majesty has chosen you because you are kind and wise. Today is a happy day."
A happy day.
I wanted to cry and laugh at the same time.
But I nodded instead. "Thank you, Madam Lin."
There was no point in saying anything else. No one would believe I had lived and died already. That I had seen the truth behind the golden mask.
But I believed it. And I would not forget.
The wedding procession was ready. Trumpets sounded outside the palace walls. The sun was high in the sky, bright and blinding. I stepped out into the courtyard, where the bridal carriage waited.
The air was warm, and petals floated in the wind.
It looked exactly as I remembered.
Too perfect.
The people cheered as I climbed into the carriage. I stared straight ahead, not letting my mask slip.
Inside the carriage, I was alone. I touched the red veil lightly. In the past, I had looked forward to lifting it in front of Zhao Rui. I had dreamed of what he would say, what he would think.
But now, I no longer cared.
No, that's not true.
I cared too much. That was the problem.
The betrayal still burned deep in my chest. I could still feel the sword against my neck. I could still hear him say, "Execute the traitor," as if I meant nothing.
I was done being weak.
This time, I would not be fooled.
This time, I would not trust him.
I would protect my family. I would protect myself. I would watch everyone, including Consort Mei, the ministers, and even the servants. No one could be trusted.
And if I played my cards right… I would take everything from Zhao Rui, just as he took everything from me.
I closed my eyes and leaned back in the carriage.
In this life, I would not love.
In this life, I would not fall.
I would rise.
Even if I had to burn the empire to do it.