Also known as: When You Accidentally Compete with Destiny and Food Delivery
Wei Long had decided on a new ambition.
Not power.
Not enlightenment.
Not domination over cosmic fate.
But…
"I'm going to open a dumpling shop."
Lin Qian blinked. "Master, the heavens just told you you're a cosmic anomaly."
Wei Long nodded. "And I bet they've never tasted triple-stuffed pork-and-pear qi dumplings."
Duan Fei, munching a burned radish, mumbled, "Actually sounds kinda good…"
Within the week, a banner was erected:
Mount Chaos Dumplings — Taste the Dao (Or Something Like That)— Grandmaster Wei Long, Legendary Founder & Occasional Cook
Within hours, disciples, pilgrims, tax collectors, and minor deities showed up. Not to eat… but to ask for guidance.
One of them knelt.
"Oh Sage of Steamed Dough, what is the meaning of the vinegar spiral?"
Wei Long, holding chopsticks, replied sincerely:
"…I just swirled it by accident."
The disciple burst into tears. "Such modesty!"
Lin Qian dragged him behind the counter. "You're creating philosophical food-based cults again."
Wei Long whispered, "Do you think I can trademark this?"
Meanwhile…
Far across the continent, in a realm wrapped in forgotten fog, a secret council of immortals gathered.
Twelve figures in shadow. One empty chair.
A hooded voice spoke:
"He is following the signs.""He has awakened the spiral.""He's cooking."
A monk with pale silver eyes hissed, "The last time this happened… the First One vanished. The universe reset the calendar."
A different voice growled:
"Then we must erase him before the pattern completes."
A fiery talisman burned on the table. It bore one symbol:
逆 (Reverse)
And one name:
Wei Long.
Back at Mount Chaos...
Wei Long stirred his dumpling pot.
It shimmered with an aura even he didn't understand.
"Did… did I just infuse enlightenment into these dumplings?"
A goat outside nodded.
Wei Long muttered, "I really need to stop thinking too hard."
Then a visitor arrived.
Not an immortal. Not a monk. Not a disciple.
Just… a girl.
Young. Ordinary. Dusty shoes. No aura.
But she held something wrapped in cloth.
Wei Long blinked. "Hi?"
She unwrapped the cloth.
Inside: a stone carving — matching the spiral the Dao had shown him.
She looked up, eyes wide.
"You're not the first. My mother… told me to find you."
Wei Long sat down.
"…I'm getting the feeling this dumpling shop might not work out."
Lin Qian leaned in.
"Master, you've just triggered a pre-heaven prophecy, a shadow council war, and possibly a culinary rebellion."
Wei Long sighed.
"…Can I finish lunch first?"
To be continued...