Chapter 28: Facing the Past
Waking up to the sound of birds chirping, Subaru got out of bed and tidied up a bit before stepping out of his temporary room.
Raising his head, the blue sky came into view.
Glancing around, Subaru confirmed that the Unseen Hands had disappeared for now.
"Looks like even Sin Archbishops get tired and need rest."
Stretching his back, Subaru made this remark and smiled while greeting those around him.
Perhaps due to the appearance of a formidable enemy outside, the previously tense atmosphere between the Sanctuary residents and the villagers of Arlam had eased a little.
The village chief of Arlam was even pulling the elders of the Sanctuary to do radio calisthenics.
—Should I be impressed by the instinctive dance skills of the elderly?
"Hey, where are you going?"
"Morning, Garfiel and Miss Ryuzu."
Turning at the sound of the voice, Subaru saw two small figures coming from the plaza entrance.
Garfiel walked ahead, glaring at Subaru with bloodshot, fierce eyes—but thanks to the panda-like black eyes left by Frederica's physical "persuasion" yesterday, he looked more comical than scary.
Following behind him was a young girl identical to the fairy-like being Subaru had seen in a previous loop.
This girl was Ryuzu Meyer, a caretaker of the Sanctuary.
Although she looked the same as others, her mature aura and more gentle temperament set her apart, making Subaru believe she was a different individual.
"Thanks again for your help today."
Subaru said this to the girl.
Hearing that, Garfiel clicked his tongue in irritation.
Subaru felt that if Ryuzu wasn't there, Garfiel would've definitely started something.
"If I just went beast mode, I could take care of that kind of enemy no problem. How can someone like me, the strongest, sit around like a coward waiting for rescue..."
Garfiel complained to Ryuzu.
It was clear that even after a night had passed, his fighting spirit hadn't faded.
In response, Ryuzu gave a weary sigh, tapped her back like an old lady, and began to scold him.
"No means no. Lil' Garf didn't I already explained why yesterday? Do you really have absolute confidence you'll win? What if you get hurt? You want to make this old lady watch you bleed again? Do you remember how heartbroken we were back then...?"
"Yeah, yeah, I get it! I won't go attacking on my own. You always hate being treated like an old lady, but only in moments like this do you act like one…"
"What was that?"
"Nothing at all~"
"You really do sound like a punk from the countryside, you know."
Subaru couldn't help but tease as he watched the exchange, though he understood that Garfiel truly respected Miss Ryuzu, and she genuinely cared for him.
Ryuzu then turned her gaze back to Subaru.
"Anyway, I'll handle Gar-bo. And you, Suba-bo, where are you off to?"
"I'm going to check on the state of the Sanctuary. And... thank someone."
"I see. Well, be careful on your way. And don't trust others too easily."
"Mm."
.
.
.
"Mom, I really worked hard today, you know. I started preparing since morning!"
Looking around, Subaru realized—he was back in his home in Japan.
He still felt the soreness from wrestling with his father Kenichi after getting out of bed. As he recalled the perfectly familiar room and the flawless scenery before him, he ate a green pea, the one vegetable he hated most.
"Truly flawless."
Tasting the peas, Subaru sighed as his worried parents watched him closely, as if shocked that he had conquered a personal challenge. He remembered once saying, "Even if the world ends, I'll never eat green peas."
"But you said it yourself, didn't you, Mom? The flavor we experience at this exact moment can only be tasted now.
Besides, it's not that bad. Maybe it's because you kept saying things like, 'I hate all small, round things. They feel gross in my mouth.' That's probably why I was so scared of peas. You should try one, Mom."
Subaru's mother, Natsuki Naeko, tilted her head and slowly took the tall plate of peas. But—
"Still, something I hate is something I hate. So I'll pass."
Naeko said this and put the pea she picked back on the plate, pushing it toward Kenichi, Subaru's father. Kenichi gave a bright smile.
"My son finally overcame one of his flaws. As a father, how could I ruin the moment? Here, I'll cheer you on!! Hey, honey, I hate tomatoes in my salad, so can you eat those for me?"
Watching his parents casually toss their disliked foods onto each other's plates, Subaru fell silent.
"No no no, this isn't just splashing cold water, it's dumping ice water on me. All my motivation just vanished. Isn't this the part where you encourage people to overcome their pickiness?!"
Subaru suddenly felt that his inability to conquer his food aversions before might be more than 50% his parents' fault.
But seeing the lively "battlefield" before him, he laughed, and quietly pushed his plate of peas back to Kenichi.
"I'm full."
With that, Subaru declared the end of their usual family breakfast time.
"Alright, if you're full, go wash your dishes to help digestion. After that, you can head to school and do your best."
"I'm already tired of this same-old school-prep speech."
Subaru shrugged and muttered under his breath, "I'm gonna sleep until noon."
As he scratched his head and tried to head back upstairs, he noticed his dad pouting over being turned down, and his mom watching him with a lonely expression while she wiped the table.
Their eyes met—and Subaru felt the emotions in them.
A deep sense of guilt struck his heart, and his face flushed with heat.
To avoid being seen, he quickly turned and fled to his room.
Placing his hand over his heart, Subaru was startled by how fast it was beating.
He fell flat on his bedding.
Around him were bookshelves filled with manga and light novels, jeans and sweatshirts tossed randomly on the floor, and a desk piled with half-read books. The old TV now served only as a gaming monitor.
The whole room gave off a feeling of quiet melancholy.
"It's exactly the same. So this is what it means to face the past?"
For the old Subaru, this part of the morning was the scariest part of the day.
The pain came not from refusing school, but from the burden of indecision after skipping for so long.
He lacked the courage to suddenly change himself.
Consumed by self-loathing and inferiority, he spent his days waiting for time to pass, only beginning to move after it was too late to go to school—his greatest regret.
Glancing at the clock, it read exactly 8:00. School started at 8:30, and it took 20 minutes by bike to get there.
There was still time.
"Based on my years of gaming experience, once I head to school, it's basically a clear condition."
Subaru fell silent.
Compared to the repeated deaths in a fantasy world, going to school didn't seem frightening anymore.
Yet he still couldn't move. Just like the old days, he sat and watched the clock tick.
Eventually, the deadline passed.
—With this, it's already too late to make it to school today.
"So... it can't be helped. Yeah, it's just... it can't be helped."
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