"Sometimes… You really do scare me…" Tobirama sighed as he looked at the reports delivered by our spies and scouts.
"Igniting a war is easy… but how the hell did you manage to turn it into a situation where the people of the villages are on the streets clamouring to kill other villages…" He sighed out loudly.
"You have grown soft sensei… words like these doesn't suit coming out of the mouth of a man who created a jutsu to summon the dead.
But it makes sense, you have really lost your edge, I mean, when was the last time you created a forbidden jutsu?" I said with a sad voice.
"A forbidden jutsu? Didn't I just make one a few months back?" Tobirama sensei asked with an eyebrow raised.
"It was a water style jutsu, sure, Apocalyptic Tsunami is good, but it isn't that ridiculous, you just needed a jutsu to make use of your newfound massive chakra, and that jutsu is just creating a shit ton of water and throwing it like a massive wave.
Were is the ingenuity in that? Heck even Madara could make something like that, and from what I recall, didn't he have a spell which released a Tsunami of Fire?
I am not saying that your jutsu is bad, but these years as a hokage have made you more of the Second Hokage, and less of Tobirama Senju.
You think from the perspective of a leader now, jutsus which would have only brought out curiosity and eagerness from you, now brings out wariness.
Your way of thinking… it has gotten reserved…" I complained, but all I said was from the bottom of my heart.
I had saved Tobirama from his death, but all these years had changed the man, sure he was nothing like Hiruzen, who was weak minded and would do everything to retain his power, but his courage… had lessened.
"You are correct… son… But you don't understand it yet, you are a kid, with your whole life ahead of you, goals, ambitions, many things… You have a lot of energy.
But me… I am old now, over my seventies, time sure has a way of doing unexpected things of someone, sure, I might live a lot more but you have to understand…
The time I am from, living past thirty was practically a miracle, and I am twice past that… I was ambitious, sure, but time washes off everything…
If you think about it, most of my dreams have actually been completed, I am not an idealist like my brother, I don't believe that world peace is possible, even if you conquer the whole world, there would still be fighting.
And dreams… well, they change from time to time, a teen might dream about ruling over the world, while an adult might just want a beautiful home and loving family in some countryside.
You understand what I am saying right? To be honest, fact is, my dream right now is to dump all my work to you, and retire peacefully." Tobirama chuckled
His words put me in deep thought, and as much as I would hate to agree, he's right…
A part of me might find putting this whole world in war as entertainment, but another part of me also wants to escape from everything and live together with Tsunade in some faraway place.
As for why I want to become stronger? That is because I am afraid… afraid that I might lose it all, even after all my pretences, in my core, I am a coward… someone who is afraid of dying eventually, someone who fears that he cannot protect what he holds dear.
And it is not something I would like to change, because, I believe this is what defines me.
When I arrived into this world, all my thoughts were about becoming stronger because that was the only way to survive, but now that I have grown strong enough, my thoughts have grown way more complex.
At least, the core desire of getting stronger is the same…
Selflessness is not for me, at my heart, I know that I am not the best fit to become Hokage, because, I don't think that I would ever be able to become someone who would sacrifice himself for ordinary villagers.
If it was for Tsuna, I would protect her even if it means sacrificing myself, but random nobodies whom I don't know? Nah.
Maybe the reason why I desire to become Hokage is the vanity of fame, of a lasting legacy, of pride…
But I am a materialistic and Vane man, I have no desire to be a selfless saint.
If the world is burning, I don't think I would be the one who would charge in to save everything, at best, first secure myself, and if it doesn't harm me much, send aid.
Tsunade could have became an Hokage, but well, I might have led her astray, you know, that bad company your parents warn you about, and want to stay away from? I am somewhat like that bad company.
Except, in this world, it isn't something like guiding you towards drugs, rather, guiding you towards a new, unconceivable thought process, which, according to the people of this world, might be more dangerous than any drugs.
"You know, becoming a Hokage seems like a pain in the arse, but still, I agree, as soon as this war ends, I will become the Hokage.
My face would look absolutely stunning on that mountain, and considering it would be beside you, it would make it easy for people to understand how much difference could there be even amongst Hokage.
Comparison hurts, but only if you are on the losing side, otherwise, it is awesome, and clearly, I would be winning." I smirked.
"You kid… You are somewhat like me in that part. Don't think that I don't know about your thoughts, but yes, selflessness is something even I lacked at the beginning, but somewhere down the line, you would come to love your own village, maybe love it enough to protect it with your life… Like you would with Tsunade." He chuckled and said, as if he could have heard my thoughts.
"Yeah, I don't think that would be happening." I said sheepishly.
He started laughing, "Good… maybe it is better to be selfish sometimes, because I would really hate it if you became selfless enough to sacrifice your life and die before me."
"Maybe even you aren't completely selfless yet then." I felt warmth in my heart, but since it would be quite gay to express my feelings, I replied with a joke, trying to divert the topic.
"No one is. And if they are, they aren't living." He replied seriously.
"Hmm, but I have heard that some monks could do that." I chuckled
"And I clearly don't consider that shit as living, asceticism is something I find rather foolish and pointless, it goes against everything what we humans stand for.
If asceticism truly was the true way to live, then doesn't that mean that humans are foolish for creating materialistic stuff since the beginning of time?" He countered.
"Now, as much as I would like to continue with this topic, we can't forget that we were meeting for a reason, there's a war going on which we have to command,
I think we would have plenty of time to waste on topics like these once I figure out a way to achieve immortality and become invincible." Finally, after I don't know after how long, but I managed to steer the conversation back to matter at hand.
"Yeah, so like I was saying, Kumo, Iwa and Kiri have already locked themselves in a three way war, each clamouring to end the other two.
Your genjutsu based war guiding has been more successful than I imagined, their entire population is pro war right now, even if their Kage desired to call for peace, their people won't agree.
They are stuck, with no choice but to fight this war until they grow weary.
And Suna, they were troublesome at the start, but with the contributions of the research department and medical department, we have already figured out most of their poisons, and their threat has been lowered by over fifty percent.
Now, the only thing left is for you to go and establish your reputation, make a name for yourself, do some feats, so that it would be easy to make you the hokage." Ah, right, since strength is what matters here, even after nepotism, one still needs to prove their strength.
"Suna was never a threat honestly… But still, since you say so, I would go to the battlefield, and drive them to their last stand, then, when their final attack arrives, I would crush it single handedly, that would probably be enough of a feat to become Hokage." I smirked as plans formed in my head.
Finally, it was my turn to go and aura farm.
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Sorry about the late updates, this last week was the last week before my endsems, which means, during this past week I had to cram up all the projects, practicals, reports... everything I had been stalling for the entire sem, charge at me at once, anyways, finally, my exams start, and a month long vacation (exam time) begins.