TW: This chapter contains mature themes and triggering content (sexual assault,abuse, violence). Read at your own discretion.
I walked out of my room dressed in black pants and a black hoodie. Jeremy wanted to meet up outside the café and talk. He said he was planning something with James, but he wanted to discuss it with me first.
I stood between the front door and the living room, where Mom was.
"Where are you going?"
I turned my head. Mom was putting caramel popcorn into her mouth, so it wasn't her who asked. I turned the other way.
It was my uncle. He stood with a wine bottle, curiosity on his face.
"I'm meeting Jeremy."
Uncle let out a quiet chuckle. I got the feeling he was laughing at me, or maybe he's just the type of person who does that randomly. I noticed thin drops of sweat rolling down his hand and dripping onto the wine bottle.
"You'll have to tell me later who this Jeremy is. Honestly, I still don't have all your friends' names straight," he said, smiling. "You'll have to tell me about all of them."
My eyes widened. I can't tell him about them. Just mentioning Jeremy should be enough.
"I only hang out with Jeremy," I said with a sad tone.
"Really? I heard there's also Malachai, James…"
"I don't know who that is," I cut him off. Maybe he won't push further. But what if he asks Mom if that's true? A million scenarios ran through my head, and none of them seemed good enough for me to agree with. Maybe I should just tell the truth? Admit he's right?
"Okay. That's true, but only…"
Only what? I hadn't thought this through, and now it sounded suspicious.
"And that's him?" Uncle pointed toward the window, breaking me out of my thoughts. There was someone standing by a car in the yard. My heart jumped into my throat. Malachai has no right to be here now.
"I think so," I answered.
"You think so… Maybe I'll go check," he offered.
"No, I'll handle it."
"You look like you've seen a ghost. You sure?"
"Yes."
I took three deep breaths and walked closer to the front door. I cracked it open to peek outside. My eyes darted left and right, searching for any kind of trap. Nothing.
"I'll get going now," I muttered.
I opened the door wider. I still couldn't see the person's face, but the posture reminded me of Malachai. The first step forward was already taken—I couldn't turn back. Malachai wasn't facing away but stood leaning against the car, facing me.
Today's wind was strong, like it wanted to blow me away. The sky had turned dark, and most kids were out trick-or-treating. None of them came near our house, which relieved me.
Getting closer, I saw his face painted white, with black around the eyes and mouth. He wore a dark hoodie and sweats—almost like mine. The hood was pulled up.
"What are you doing here?" I asked, but he didn't answer. "Malachai?"
"Don't you recognize me?"
I stepped back. My mouth opened on its own—I couldn't control it.
"You said that freak's name instead of mine?"
I wanted to shout something, but I couldn't. Standing in front of me was James.
***
"What do you want to drink?" he asked me.
"Nothing."
We were at a gas station and James was buying alcohol. I don't remember how we got there. I don't even remember getting into his car. Everything was foggy, like someone had taken something from me, though I couldn't say what exactly.
"So, how do you like my makeup? Pretty cool, right?" He smiled, and I dropped my gaze to the snack shelf. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw the joy vanish from his face.
"Who did it for you?" I asked.
"Ah, Mary," he replied quickly.
"And are you going to her place?" Part of me hoped he'd say yes. Another part didn't want that at all. The guilt gnawed at me, wanting to claw its way out and shoot me in the face.
"Er, no. She's going out with her friends, and I don't want to bother her, I know how she gets when…"
Oh, how noble. Thinking about other people's feelings. I rolled my eyes. Honestly, I wasn't listening anymore.
"And you're not going out with the rest of them?" I cut into his monologue.
"The rest? You mean Malachai…"
"Yes, I mean them."
"Oh… yeah, we're going out."
We? What do you mean we?
"You must be mistaken. I need to meet with…" Shit. Jeremy. I quickly pulled out my phone to check if he'd texted. Nothing. No notifications. Why do I keep forgetting about him? Damn it.
"Meet with who?" James looked almost jealous.
"With Jeremy."
Silence.
"Why him?" He walked toward the counter without taking his eyes off me.
"I don't have to explain myself to you."
"Of course you do. You're my friend. Friends tell each other everything."
I grabbed my own hand. Hearing that sentence from his mouth felt strange.
A few steps left to the counter. The cashier was waiting, clearly exhausted, with dark bags under his eyes and a slumped posture.
"That all?" he asked us.
"Also a pack of cigarettes, and hang on…" James turned, grabbed something from a shelf, and returned with a grin. "And these." It was condoms. My stomach lurched.
"What kind of cigarettes?" the man asked, almost collapsing from fatigue.
"The most expensive ones."
He nodded and turned away to grab them.
My jaw clenched and unclenched, my fingers trembling.
"Don't worry," James said, squeezing my right ass cheek hard, sending a wave of disgust through me. "You'll get to like it."
I clasped my hands together.
When the cashier handed him the cigarettes, I bolted out of the store and leaned against the wall outside.
I could run, but where? I didn't even know this town had a gas station.
"Where are you running off to?"
James appeared next to me with the shopping bag. It was see-through, I could see everything—except for two items.
"Where are the smokes and the condoms?" I asked.
"In my pocket. I never put them in the wrong place—something could happen to them."
I nodded.
"If you want, we can use one right now," he said. I looked at him with terror written all over my face.
"I don't think so."
James burst into laughter. From far away, his voice echoed. It chilled me.
"Relax, boy," he grabbed my neck. "We can play without them—again."
***
I stood with my pants down in the same spot as before. I was afraid someone would see us, or that the cashier would soon step outside to smoke or do something else and see the sight.
"James, please, let's go to the car or somewhere else," I wanted to scream, but he just threatened that if I started screaming, he'd call the guy behind the counter and that the guy would record the whole thing. He said they knew each other very well.
It's so humiliating that he wants to do this at a gas station, and in the open air, at that.
"You've never done this in public before?" He slid his cock inside me. "Easy, I'll be quick now."
He slammed himself in and out of me like some kind of machine programmed for this. He grabbed my ass tightly and didn't let go for a second.
"Ah..." I gritted my teeth. All I saw was the wall, and my eyes darted back and forth between it at breakneck speed. I thought I was about to fall into it.
"Do you like that?"
I felt a deeper thrust, and at the same time, I felt like I was being torn apart from the inside. I saw the shadow of his hand rise up, and then he slapped me hard on the right buttock.
"Ah!" I screamed.
He put his hand to my mouth.
"I'd advise you to be quiet now," he said. Two cars drove past us on the road, but they didn't seem to notice us.
"Let me go."
"What?" He pulled his hand away from me, and it was covered in my saliva. "Are you still drooling?" I couldn't catch my breath. He pulled my sweatshirt aside, tucked it under my shirt, and started groping me everywhere.
"Stop," I said. He grabbed my penis with his other hand and moved it up and down.
" Why would I?" He pounded into me harder and harder. I heard his teeth chatter. He pressed against me with all his might.
"Ah!" I came. The contents of my body landed on the dirty wall. There were tiny remnants of fluid on James's hand. Suddenly, he pressed my face against the wall and put his fingers in my mouth.
"You're really fast," he snorted. He turned my head so that we looked at each other, saying nothing, just staring. I saw only darkness in his eyes. Something diabolical.
More cars passed and disappeared behind the trees. I was still afraid someone would come and complain about what was happening, but James wasn't afraid. He wasn't afraid of anything.
I heard my phone vibrate.
"James… ah," I tried to say. "I need to check…"
"Shut up, fuck," he gasped. He immediately slowed down considerably, began moving me and his body even slower, making me feel as if his cock were inside me and barely moving, just standing there. It wasn't a pleasant feeling.
"Better?" He brushed my hair back. His warm lips touched my neck and he bit it lightly.
"Ah!"
"Do you know what that means?" he asked quietly.
"N-n-no."
"A mark—you belong to me now."
He pulled my hair and forced me to my knees. I could see the faint shapes next to him, but I tried to convince myself it was just my imagination and that everything would be alright soon.
"Open your mouth."
I opened my mouth wider, and he pushed his penis into my mouth. He moved my head faster and faster until I felt his penis lodge in my throat, then shoot out. I pushed myself away from him and threw up. I didn't have a moment's respite when
James pulled his pants back on and held out his hand to me, saying,
"Get up, we have one more place to go."