GUYSSSS I'M BACKKKKKMMMMM
AND WE'RE BACKKKK TO REGULAR UPLOADING
AND WE ARE ALLL SIGMASSSSS
IDK WHAT TO SAY JUST ENJOY THE CHAPTER I GUESS
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I glanced thoughtfully at the watch on my wrist, which told me it was time to get ready for the gala.
"I guess I should start preparing, Jarvis."
"Yes, you should, sir."
I went to my bedroom and opened the wardrobe filled with countless extravagant suits. There were suits in all sorts of colors,
red, blue, green… and… wait a minute. Pink???? What the hell. You know what? I'm just gonna pretend those pink suits don't exist. I quickly grabbed a classic black suit and slammed that wardrobe shut as fast as humanly possible. I also picked out a black shirt and a black tie and started getting dressed.
A few minutes later
I walked out of my bedroom already dressed in that black suit. Right away I heard Jarvis's AI voice chime in:
"You look exceptionally great today, sir."
"Thanks, Jarvis."
I stood in front of the mirror and stared at myself for a moment, and I realized Jarvis wasn't lying. I actually looked good. No,
actually, I looked majestic. I'm certain I could mog literally anyone. Even Chico Lachowski wouldn't stand a chance against me.
(Guys, this man is completely delusional. His ego is beyond this world. My guy is not majestic, has no aura whatsoever, and he is DEFINITELY NOT mogging Chico Lachowski.)
(Insert Chico Lachowski here, please.)
I smiled at the mirror, glanced back at my watch, and realized the gala was about to start. I stepped into the garage and looked over the row of motorcycles in front of me.
"Uhhhhhm… which one should I pick today, huh?"
After a long, exhausting moment of "serious contemplation" about which bike I'd ride tonight, I finally settled on the Ducati Panigale V4. I strapped on my helmet, opened the garage, and rode out. As usual, I drove like a total maniac,because honestly, who doesn't love riding like a maniac? Exactly, nobody. Everybody loves it. I twisted the throttle and with an ear-splitting roar blasted through traffic. Every time I revved the engine it sounded like the screeching of a thousand angry velociraptors.
(I totally stole the velociraptor thing from Sir_Stronghold, so shoutout to him ✌️)
I went so fast I reached the gala in like five minutes flat, and I really enjoyed myself, even though I'm pretty sure a ton of drivers were cursing my existence after witnessing my driving style. But that doesn't matter. What truly matters is that : I'M FAST AS HELL BABYYYYY.
When I arrived, I saw a ton of people with cameras and a big red carpet, so I knew I was in the right place. I stopped in front of it and pulled off my helmet. The second I did, I was practically blinded by an army of camera flashes. Squinting and struggling, I climbed off my bike. Some guy dressed in the typical valet uniform rushed up to me, so I just handed him the helmet and my bike keys. He happily took them and went to do his job, while I kept shielding my eyes from the flashes and made my way down the red carpet with my head slightly bowed.
Finally, I managed to open my eyes, and what I saw surprised me. There were hundreds of people dressed luxuriously, with waiters walking around carrying trays of wine and finger foods. Honestly, I was expecting like a hundred people, NOT over three hundred. Turns out I was wrong. Not that it bothered me much. I reached out to grab a canapé from one of the trays, but then I heard a very familiar voice..…
I sighed and walked back toward the entrance. And there he was, Hal Jordan, a.k.a. Green Lantern, arguing with a security guard.
"Listen, big guy, I was invited, so let me through already!" Hal protested.
"Look, sir, I can't let you in without an invitation, which you obviously don't have," the security guard replied, clearly annoyed.
"I do have it, uhmmmm… look over there! I think Lex Luthor is handing out bonuses to anyone who catches this coin!" Hal said, tossing a coin behind the guard and trying to slip past him.
The guard hesitated for a split second, turning to catch the coin, but then immediately whipped back around with rage written all over his face. He grabbed Hal by the back of his collar and yanked him back.
"You little bastard, who do you think you are, huh?! You think I'm that stupid?!"
Hal instantly raised his hands in defense, about to make some kind of smart-ass comment, but that's when I finally decided to step in. I walked up to the guard and spoke.
"Let him go. He's with me, he's my guest."
The guard quickly released Hal and started apologizing, saying he didn't know. I just waved him off dismissively and turned my attention to Hal. He was also wearing a black suit like mine, and we were about the same height. Honestly, someone might say we looked a lot alike.
Hal slung an arm around my shoulder, snatched a glass of wine from a passing waiter with his other hand, and started talking.
"Hey, bro, how you've been? I've been doing amazing."
"I'm great, Hal. But where's Barry? He's not with you? For the fastest man alive, he's not exactly punctual."
"Welllllll, ehhhh… Barry called me, said something about a menacing speedster in a blue suit. I think he said his name was… ehhh… Sabatar? No, that's not it… hmmm… Sevitar? No, that can't be right either." Hal snapped his fingers. "Got it! He called him Savitar. Barry said he had to take care of him."
(Insert menacing-looking Savitar here.)
I kept my poker face, but in my head I was already thinking: Savitar? As in THE Savitar? Hmmm, interesting outcome of events. But my thoughts were interrupted once again by Hal.
"Anyway, bro, I'm gonna go find myself a sexy rich woman." And with that, he quickly disappeared into the crowd of wealthy people.
(Nah, this guy didn't go looking for rich women, he went straight to find some Femboys trust me, i just can't prove it yet)
(Insert Doakes meme)