A chirpy ringing vibrated in my ears as I grumbled under my breath, awakening in ire. I weakly stretched my limb as I snatched my phone irritatedly and swiped on the screen mindlessly, then placed my phone nearby on the bed whilst my eyes closed and opened exhaustedly, returning to the paradise of unconsciousness, and teleporting back to the mundane reality back and forth continuously. I hummed groggily towards the caller, my voice raspy.
"Good morning, I'm sorry. Did I wake you just now?" Calix's deeper, coarse voice reached my ears, the vibration of the phone transmitted through the fabric materials of the bed, circulating through my skin.
My eyes grew weightless, shooting open swiftly, "huh? Oh, no. Don't worry, it's fine," I assured, my voice slightly cracking as the crispness of my vocals made me cringe.
He laughed, "oh, I disturbed your sleep didn't I? You can continue, I don't want to hinder your rest."
I shook my head naturally, my head beginning to clear and my sleepy trance dispersing. "You're not. I want to talk to you more than I do sleep," I stated truthfully, clearing my webbed throat as I finished.
He exhaled a soft breath, my lips stretched, sensing his smile on the other side, "thanks.." he says quite shyly.
"How's your sleep?" I asked, sitting up as I placed my phone on my ear and planted my feet on the ground.
"It was pretty good, as usual. Yours?" He responded fast, reciprocating my inquiry in return.
I stood up, heading to the bathroom as I put the phone on speaker and placed it on the countertop holding the sink. I grabbed my brush and ran it through my hair strands and curled knots. "It was great," I lied.
He hummed in acknowledgement, "what are you doing now?"
"About to wash my face. You're gonna hear water running but I can hear you just fine so keep talking. How about you?" I turned on the faucet, water trickling down the basin.
"I was watching a movie before I called you and now I'm just lying down on the couch."
I rubbed my face gently, yet with enough pressure as I smeared the soap all over my face. I hummed in acknowledgement, nodding instinctively as the echo of my voice vibrated in the room.
"You know, earlier I was watching a romance movie and I immediately thought of you."
My lips curved into a smile as his words reached my brain, my heart responding immediately to his sweet words.
The foam had expanded greatly on my face. I was unable to see, and I daren't open my eyes—internally cringing as my eyes felt an incorporeal sting through the vivid imagination of my mind presenting the possibility of the foam touching my eyes originating from personal experience and memory I refused to repeat. I reached down, my hands floating unsteadily to find the dulled sharp, specified and indescribable shape of the faucet I knew too well. My knuckles met a hard solidness abruptly, and I hissed reactively.
"Aslynne? Are you okay?" Calix asked, his voice painting concern very clearly.
My fingers touched a cold, metal object that was thin, yet solid. I sighed in relief as I pushed it upwards, the sound of running water reaching all corners of the room. I placed my open palms underneath the streaming liquid, catching an adequate amount before splashing it on my face, droplets of water flying towards nearby surfaces.
I let out an affirming noise, which was slightly muffled as my hands were rubbing over my face to cleanse off the soap, "yeah I'm fine, don't worry."
My eyes opened as I wiped my hands on a towel and grabbed my toothbrush, coating the bristles with toothpaste. "I just accidentally hit my hand on something, no biggie."
"Ohh, okay."
"I'm brushing my teeth now, so I can't really talk. But keep talking to me, tell me about the movie you were watching." I said, before sticking my toothbrush inside my mouth and grooming my teeth.
He continued to speak, following my request while I polished my teeth. I listened attentively, silently adoring his voice and craving for his presence.
I gargled water in my mouth before ridding off all the foamy paste in my mouth. I felt refreshed and cleaner, as I placed my toothbrush in its holder. Much like Calix and I, previously. An unrequited love. He, the holder, and I, a toothbrush. He holds me, assures my safety and comfort—and as the selfish person that I am—misleading him as I simply accept it, embracing his love and fondness, yet never truly reciprocating and allowing the boundaries to cross too far.
Though, no longer.
I'll love him as he deserves it, as he had for me all this time.
The minty sensation in my mouth brings me to Calix, and I could nearly sense a gentle waft of his scent in the air.
My heart seemed to telepathically communicate to his out of my consent as he said, "hey, can I come to your room? I wanna see you."
I grinned widely, silently cheering as my feet lifted up in unison, fleetingly floating before landing back on the ground with a noise too soft to reach Calix's end. They tiptoed on the floor, skipping, kicking around quietly as an act of joy and victory. I pressed my hand together as my head tilted upwards at the ceiling, internally praying in gratitude for my granted wish.
I calmed down quickly as I glanced at myself in the mirror, my head jolted backwards, as my eyebrows slightly creased at my appearance. I brought my head towards my shoulder as I sniffed myself, grimacing in appall.
My eyes widened in panic as I glanced at my phone, then at myself, and continued back and forth that way for a brief while.
I sighed inaudibly, "sure, but later. I need to do some stuff first real quick, then I'll give you a call to let you know when. Is it fine?"
"Oh yea yea! Of course. Then, I'll let you do your thing. See you later, Aslynne." He spoke enthusiastically and his voice was overflowing with anticipation, I chuckled at his contagiously positive energy.
"Thanks, see you later Calix." I returned a farewell, and the promise of a meeting.
Tenderly, he says, "I love you."
A fiery heat rose, coating my entire skin. Is it just me or is the heater overheating?
"I.. love you.." I returned softly, the word had become foreign on my tongue without one to requite prior to yesterday.
I heard him giggling adorably before the line ended. I cooed as my knees weakened. My bum lowered before being sat on the tiled floor as I grabbed on the edge of the counter, my head pressing on the cabinet beneath it. I shut my eyes, frowning as I groaned, why is he so cute?
I whined, "he's so… UGH." I stood up, slipping my clothes off and stepping inside the shower tub.
Once I'd dried myself, I headed out to open my wardrobe, sorting my choices. Assuming I'd stay in for today, I chose a comfortable and simple outfit I usually wear.
I slipped on my undergarments beforehand, then wore a loose, long-sleeved t-shirt that had a neckline wider than necessary and dropped on a shoulder, showcasing a larger portion of my skin. Then I covered my legs with loose, gray pajama pants. I combed my hair and applied body lotion, afterwards curling my eyelashes and applying lip balm on my lips lightly.
I stepped backwards, away from the object that mirrors my reflection as I scrutinized myself. My lips curved as my heart felt pleased with my appearance of decency.
I grabbed my phone as I clicked on Calix's contact, my thumb hovering over the call button.
I closed my eyes, breathing. My thumb leaned forward as the ringing vibrated from my phone.
Once, twi—knock, knock.
My head perked towards the door. My heart raced in anticipation, yet I thought it mustn't be. I approached the door slowly, reaching the doorknob which I twisted and proceeded to pull on it inwards. I stepped aside as I felt the door being pushed from the external source.
My eyes gazed ahead, before gliding upwards. The man stepped inside, pushing the door back to close with a small nudge of his hand. I grinned brightly, unable to contain my happiness and returning his own gleeful expression which he'd worn since the beginning.
"Calix," I said softly.
He remained unresponsive, before stepping forward and reaching down slightly as he held my body and pulled me against him in an embrace. His head lowered, resting on my shoulder as his arms enveloped my waist firmly. I was slightly surprised, yet I recovered as I placed my own over his neck. A small giggle slipped past my lips due to his clingy actions.
I breathed in his scent, "missed you too." The gentle aroma of mint, patchouli and an underlying sweet scent, which I'd always recognized resided on him.
His head raised as he straightened himself slightly, my neck bent as I raised my head to see him. His one arm slid up my spine as he gripped my nape and pulled me towards him, the heel of my feet rising off the ground as he captured my lips in his.
He commanded a rhythm of passion, and need which I played along to.
Once I found myself losing oxygen, I stepped backwards—yet his arm around my waist held me unyieldingly. I placed my hand on his shoulder, pushing him slightly—and he finally released me. I panted heavily as I leaned on his chest, listening to his own rapid heartbeats matching mine.
I felt the weight of his head atop of mine, his chin moved, "missed you so much." He mumbled, cherishing me as if there were no other days to come.
I patted his back lightly as a sign, before stepping away as he reluctantly ceded his hold on me. My hand reached for his as our fingers intertwined together. I tugged him towards my bed as I sat, and he sat beside me.
"You came so quickly.." I mentioned, visibly seeing his embarrassment arise.
"Ah, I um.. yeah." He spoke nervously.
I smiled, leaning closer as I eyed him suspiciously. "Tell me, please?" I questioned, and he placed his hands over his face, covering the entirety of it.
"After the call earlier, I couldn't wait so I just.. went ahead and waited outside," his voice was slightly muffled, yet I could interpret all his words nonetheless.
I cooed at him, wrapping my arms over him instinctively. My mind thinks, though, and I hesitantly retreat off him. He doesn't allow me, as he holds my arms over him and restrains it.
He turns to me, smiling. Then he leaned over and pecked my forehead gently, as a whisper would tickle an ear.
"Have you eaten?" he questioned.
I shook my head, "not hungry."
"Have you?"
He nodded, "mhm."
"You should eat, I'll cook it up for you. Where do you put your ingredients?" He stood up, roaming around the room.
I pointed, "there." He marched his way towards the direction of my point.
He opened the cabinet I pointed to, and his head rotated towards me abruptly.
"It's only instant noodles," he stated.
I nodded, "I don't usually eat at home. I eat out."
He closed the cabinet, a swift creek sounding from it as he returned to me. The bed beside me sank slightly as Calix placed his weight on it.
"It's alright, I'm not hungry—really." I smiled up at him while he held a subtle hint of a daze.
His stare bore into my eyes, "what?" I laughed at his sudden speechlessness.
He snapped, blinking. "Huh? Ah, sorry I just.. being with you here right now feels like a dream."
I grabbed his hand, my fingers entertaining themselves with those of larger, longer ones. My lips widened, as I could feel my cheeks fluffing up underneath my eyes. He gazed at me with adoration, and I couldn't help myself—my heart reached out, and this time—they connected.
I leaned back as I inhaled a handful of oxygen, our heavy breaths filling the air and sound.
"Me too," I admitted.
"What's your love language?" I continued, renewing the conversation.
He hummed in thought, "I feel like by this point you would know. Try to guess?" he challenged, a subtle smirk on his face.
I nodded, "okay," I accepted. Then I spent a few seconds as I rack my brain through all memories of us, generating one common, consistent behavior he has which is included in the generalized love languages.
"Physical touch," I hypothesized.
He chuckled, "pretty obvious, isn't it?" he nodded in confirmation.
He grasped my hand that laid atop of his which had forgotten of the former interaction between them, as he pulled my hand out of the blue towards him, directing my body in the process as well as my head plants on his biceps, and my sides pressed onto his. Then he sneaked his arm around my waist, hauling me closer, and a position of greater comfort.
"Guess mine," I dared him.
He took a few seconds occupying his mind of thoughts and guesses, before his lips parted, "quality time?" he guessed.
I grinned, nodding, "yeah. Was it obvious?"
"Honestly, no. Not really," he replied.
"Then how'd you know?" I questioned.
"I guessed?" He answered questionably, smiling mischievously.
I squinted my eyes at him in suspicion, an eyebrow quirking upwards.
"I just know, okay. I have psychic abilities.." he joked, before laughing lightly.
My own laughter freed itself along with his, as our laughters merged an ambience of merry and jocular.
I leaned excessively backwards, as control over my body weight slipped past my fingers and my back fell on the bed, a light thump reaching my ears. Calix followed suit shortly as we laid side by side, and I shifted my body to lay on my side, facing Calix. He followed my actions.
"I.. actually I couldn't sleep last night," I admitted truthfully.
He grinned cheerfully, he was bright as the sun peeked through the window and shone upon him, an unfair bias as I was left in the shadows.
Though, I didn't mind.
"You seem awfully happy knowing I didn't sleep well," I teased him, a small smile forming in my face.
His eyes widened slightly, "no, no. I didn't mean it that way—" he laughed.
"Cause I couldn't sleep either, thinking of you.. It's nice to know you felt the same way." He explained.
Our hands tangled in each other as I shifted my attention to our physical connection. Yet, I felt my repressed longing for this had prolonged, and unsatisfactory lingers as I feel an exceeding desire for the abundance of him.
"I want to see your room.. Can I?" I fiddled with his fingers, keeping my gaze on our knotted hands.
He shifted his body slightly, and a warm hand cupped my chin, his index and middle finger pressing onto my cheek with the opposing pressure of his thumb on the other side. Then, he tweaked my face towards him—my eyes jerked upwards, meeting his and expanded.
He reciprocated the greeting of my eyes with the greeting of his lips. A soft, brief peck before it ended and his lips parted in a wide grin, his canines flashing at me. I lurched backwards, covering my lips with the back of my hand as I found myself in a flustered state before I could control it.
"What.. why'd you do that..?" My voice trembled, as I breathed shakily—feeling heat rising up to my cheeks.
"Had the urge to," he answered, unfazed. A small, skittish smile decorated his lips.
Before I could retort any further, he clasped my hand and sat up, lifting me along as my body rose up promptly to a seated position and he stood up.
My eyebrows crinkled in confusion, and he nodded his head towards the door. "Let's go," he tugged on my hand lightly.
I tilted my head, "where?"
He mirrors my actions, "my room?"
"Ahh," I nodded in understanding. I stood up, and we headed out the door.
We stepped out the door as the door swung, closing behind us, "phone?" he reminded.
My eyes widened, "oh yea!" I exclaimed in alarm. His arm reflexively stretched beside my head, opposing the natural force of the door that was a few inches away from closing, pushing it backwards as I rushed inside and returned outside with my phone in my hand.
"Thank God, thank you," I said appreciatively.
Rummaging through my mind in case of any more belongings I needed to bring and finding none, the door shut closed with a loud clack.
We tread through the hallway, in the elevator, and out in silence. I followed as he dragged me through the hallways I walk through nearly every day, not a single difference aside from the "5" initial room numbers. Finally, Calix stopped in his tracks by a door.
525. 525.
I repeated his room number in my head to embed it within my memory.
He inserted his pin as I retraced our previous steps, and familiarity returned.
"Wait, this is like.. I go to your room the exact same way I go to mine.." I blurted out in realization.
He laughed breathily, "uh-huh." The door unlocked and his hand twisted the knob, exerting force outwards as the door opened with a short, soft wail.
"Doesn't that mean.. your room is right below mine?" I mumbled, too lost in thoughts, I hardly registered the gentle nudge on my back, urging me forward as the door closed once my feet settled in the new environment.
"Yes, darling," he chuckled, tucking a strand away from my face as he gazed at me fondly.
My brain registered those words as my heart stuttered heavily, and I could feel the warmth on my cheeks overheating.
I turned around, away from him as I covered my face. My lips curved into a bright smile, one hidden beneath my hands. I smiled so wide my cheeks throbbed as they were constantly overworked due to how much Calix adorns a smile on my face.
I breathed deeply as I closed my eyes, sucking my cheeks inside to relieve off the sore sensation and return my lips to its natural, neutral curves. My body rotated again, seeing Calix in the same position through my fleeting, flustered moment. He had a fond smile, contained words he didn't say—
You're so adorable. I heard his words, but his mouth hadn't moved.
"Anyway, your room is.. very clean." I say, astonished.
I moved forward, scrutinizing every corner of his room, and inhaling his scent. Then, I saw a familiar object. I approached it, and my eyes widened, "wait, isn't this the candy you always give me?" I say, laughing lightly.
He nodded with a smile, "yeah, want some?" he asked.
I nodded, "can I?" I asked politely, a shy smile coating my face.
He stroked my hair, a soft peck to the top of my head. "Yes baby, it's all yours. You can take anything you want from me, I've given you my heart already."
My body shifted towards him. I leaned up, my lips embracing his as I smiled against him. My heels landed on the ground, my head tilted up as I cherished the moment of him—of us.
"I love you."
"I love you."
I gazed into his affectionately, seeing how beautiful it seemed, the person he's gazing upon.
He makes me feel pretty.
I caressed his face with my gaze as I admired all his imperfections, all to create a wondrous perfection of a human.
He is pretty.
I could see him leaning in forward as I shifted my body, shoving my hand inside the pack, and pinching out a mint which I raised to my eye level, glancing at him shortly before creating further distance. "Thanks!" I exclaimed, moving to the other side of his room, examining his personal belongings and his room.
He had a monochromatic theme in his entire room. Suppose he was honest of not harboring any sort of bias towards a specific color. However, I noticed his room, monochromatic as is, only better complemented the flowers scattered on parts of his room.
I approached one, "you like flowers, yeah?" I asked him, gently stroking the petals of a red rose that hasn't bloomed in complete blossom. I felt his presence behind me as his hand cupped mine, gently rubbing my skin with his thumb.
He makes a sound of agreement, "I love them."
"Wanna know something?" he questioned, though it had an obvious answer. I nodded, urging him to continue.
"This here." He touched the green-leaf-like part that forms a whorl and embraces the petals. "Is a calyx," he stated in a matter-of-fact tone.
I looked up at him with wide eyes and an open mouth, "it's like—" realization hits me verbally. He nods, grinning at me as his enthusiasm radiates furthermore.
"See here, a calyx forms a protective layer around a flower in a bud." He explained. I nodded silently in awe, urging him to continue.
"This calyx, is me. These lovely petals, are you. Together, we form a rose," he finished.
I cooed, "that's so sweet."
I feel my heart shaking, quaking—not in anger, in love. I would gladly drown in his pit of love, if it meant my love for him would rise, jumping—shooting above towards him, shoving him with all the love he needs and more.
"Wait, wait. I have a good pick up line," I said to him, grinning whimsically. He nods, urging me to continue as his eyebrow arched.
"Would you be the calyx to my rose?" I say, exaggeratedly batting my eyelashes as I tucked my already-tucked strands behind my ear.
We burst into laughter, and in the same moment—he held my head as he leaned down, pecking a touch of love on my forehead, "I actually would," he laughed, and so did I.
Once the laughter died down, there was a lingering presence of happiness left within the air. "Actually though, how do you keep these flowers alive in this season?" my curiosity instigated.
His head turned up as his gaze was empty, his presence disappearing as he teleported into his mind for a moment. "Honestly, I don't really know. I nurture them just as a gardener would, and it's not like they don't wilt. They do, but rarely. That kinda makes me wonder too.." he trailed off, returning to his headspace.
I nodded in understanding, "so, you were named after that?" I pointed at the calyx.
He shrugged, "I guess so? I didn't name myself."
"True, but how did you find out about that? It's so botanical, are you secretly an avid botanist?" I squinted my eyes at him, expressively revealing my exaggerated suspicion.
He rolled his eyes in kid, "don't start," he sassed.
I smirked, "or what?" I dared.
The light seemed to dissipate as the shadows lurked. The air between us seemed to permeate with danger and daunt. I swallowed my fear, falsifying a display of courage within a nerved posture and a nonchalant expression.
He chuckled darkly, he brought his hand up to my nape, lightly brushing the skin. I squirmed, biting my lips as my voice threatened to flee. He grinned malignantly.
I stepped to his side, an attempt of escape—when he grabbed a hold of me and his hands began to roam, lightly sweeping on certain areas of my body. I bit my lips to muffle my voice, but eventually it accumulated in the finite space of my throat and exploded.
I made attempts to push him away in which he didn't budge as the room was filled with my loud, hysterical laughter which had erupted uncontrollably. He laughed maniacally, as he played in accordance with his role—tickling me everywhere and all over while my stomach began to cramp and I was pleading for these recalcitrant sensations to cease.
"Please stop, oh my gosh–" I yelled between breaths and laughter.
He lifted his arms off of me, having them afloat by each side of his head as he feigned innocence.
"You asked, I give," he defended.
Somehow, my back now rested on his soft bed as I had rapid, deep intake of breaths to retrieve my composure and equilibrium. He laid beside me, a playful smile adorning his face as he blatantly stared at me. I had a staring contest with the ceiling, while he had an unrequited staring contest.
"I'm.. hungry," I say after gaining calmness, spinning my head to return his eyes—glued stuck to my face.
He sat up, "I'll cook something for us." I sat up, "thanks." I laid back down.
He ruffled my hair before standing up and disappearing from my range of vision.
I closed my eyes.
An hour passed.
Light feathers were planted all over my face as my eyes fluttered open. I rubbed my eyes lightly to clear my blurred vision. I began to register light touches on my face as I blinked the drowsiness away. I finally established Calix pressing light pecks on me as he grinned when his eyes met mine.
"Morning, sleepyhead." He says teasingly, rubbing my head.
I leaned into his touch, hankering to return to unconsciousness in the cradle of his presence.
I closed my eyes.
I felt a firm grip on my waist as my body was strongly brought to a rise, off the soft sheets beneath me.
I whined, opening my eyes. "I sleep." I closed my eyes, my back sinking down.
Yet it never landed.
I felt water smeared over my face, and my eyes bulged open. I grabbed his wrist, "stop it!" I grunted.
He deadpanned, "it's Monday."
My jaw dropped, "what?! What time is it?!" I hurriedly grabbed the nearest phone and turned it on.
Sunday.
My eyebrows furrowed.
17:26
I glared.
Is that.. me?
The anger diffused.
"Yes. Pretty, right? It's what I see everyday." He says, a light pink shade painting his cheeks as he smiles expansively.
My eyes lingered on the picture on his phone, unable to leave. I appeared ethereal. It was breathtaking.
A smile broke out as I gaze at myself in awe, I feel pretty.
"When did you take this?" My eyes finally left the image, now settling on Calix's.
"Yesterday, when you were admiring the view and I was admiring you." He says truthfully, grinning happily.
My head bent down, "thanks.." I say shyly.
His hand cupped my jaw, his thumb tracing the lower part of my cheek, nudging my chin upwards before planting his lips on mine momentarily.
Once our lips parted, he grasped my hand tightly, sliding off the bed as he stood up. He stretched his arm inwards, pulling me to him as I stood up in front of him.
"I've made dinner. Let's eat, you haven't eaten all day, right?"
"Yeah, um, did you shower?" My eyes examined his hair, and the beads of water drops, trickling down. Though, my scent senses were the alarm as his scent had amplified.
He nodded, "yeah. Do I smell weird?" He brought his arm up as he sniffed himself.
I gritted my teeth in shame, only now realizing the offense he might've perceived. "No no! Sorry, I didn't mean it that way, just, um.. your—you smell good is all, don't worry," I stammered, biting my lip once I finished.
He smiled, saying nothing as he led me to the dining table, gently lifting my chair behind as I stood in front, pushing it forward when I sat. He moved around the table before repeating his former actions for himself.
He cooked plenty. There were 5 plates on the table, excluding ours. There were fried eggs, a mixture of vegetables, meat, fish, and corn soup on their own, separate plate.
He remembers, I smiled to myself.
We ate in silence as we emptied our plates easily. "Thanks for the food," I said gratefully as I placed my utensils down.
My taste buds were in heaven.
"Yeah, how was it?" he asked, and I noticed a subtle hint of nervousness.
"It's really good, you could become a chef, honestly." I complimented sincerely.
He seemed bashful out of a sudden. "You flatter me," he says, an abashed smile plastered on his face.
"Well, not just any chef. You should be my chef," I said, cringing at the cheesiness immediately as soon as the words left my lips. I facepalmed, weighing my head on my palm.
He laughed aloud, attempting to halt it as he muffled it with his hand, yet it worked otherwise. I laughed lightly along, feeling the embarrassment vivid through the rising heat.
The moment passed, and I pressed the side-button of my phone, seeing the time. Calix mimicked my actions as his eyebrows rose slightly, "it's getting late."
"Yeah, um.." I hesitated, as I knew the words to lead me back to my room, yet I couldn't dismiss the rebuttal of my heart which only desired to spend each minute with her beloved.
"I'll escort you back," Calix spoke for me. I nodded, a pang of disappointment scratching in me as I stood, the chair's legs dragging against the floor unwillingly through the force of my body.
My eyes closed momentarily, and opened—I was in front of my room door.
625
I inserted the pin and exerted force as I pressed my palm on the flat, vertical surface. A glimpse of my room's view entered my vision and absorbed by my brain. I heard a wordless murmur, and a light pressure on my head.
My body spun around—a wall.
A wall?
My head shifted to the side, a figure walking before disappearing by the corner.
Calix.
My arm extended instinctively, and I stared. I lowered my hand, entering my room.
I sat on my bed, pondering. I raised my palm, pressing it onto the skin of my chest—right over my heart. She shouted loudly—a cry, and a cheer.
Gratitude for the day, and an unending starvation for him.
I felt a blossoming garden, yet wilted without him.