Jiang Sui pushed the girl's wheelchair to the morgue. Her pale face was expressionless.
"Let me take a look myself first."
When they reached the door, the girl, who had remained silent the entire time, finally spoke.
Jiang Sui lowered his eyes, his fingers bruised as he pushed the wheelchair. "Okay, I'll take you in and come out right away, okay?"
His voice was low, a hint of panic lingering in it.
Su Qing pursed her lips and nodded gently.
Mei Yeqin nodded to Jiang Sui, signaling that it was time to go in.
Jiang Sui walked numbly, pushing open the incredibly heavy door. He lowered his head and half-knelt in front the girl, tucking her blanket over her. Words clung to his throat, but he never uttered them.
Putting the girl down in front of the white sheet, Jiang Sui walked out the door, feeling all his strength drain away.
He had anticipated this outcome long before he'd decided to tell the girl.
He knew she'd definitely come to see her.
But actually putting it into action proved even more difficult than he'd initially thought.
Jiang Sui leaned against the door, his expression tinged with a chill.
He leaned close to the door, feeling as if he was as close to the girl as he could get, as if they were connected.
Su Qing sat quietly on her wheelchair, her expression gradually faltering, her fingers moving slowly.
A long time passed, unbearably long.
The girl finally mustered the courage, pulled down the white cloth, and see Su Rao.
Her face was devoid of any life.
A make up artist had restored her original lively expression, but Su Qing could still see that Su Rao was completely devoid of any vitality.
Her skin was cold and stiff.
Her eyes would never open again.
She would never call herself "Nannan" or "Qing Qing" again.
Su Qing knew she would never hear her cough again, never see those frail, trembling eyes.
Although timid, her mother always protected her.
Su Qing bit her lip hard, trying not to cry. Her tears fell uncontrollably, silently and lifelessly.
She gritted her teeth.
After a long moment, a sound escaped her.
"Mom."
Her voice trembled uncontrollably, her face growing even more gloomy.
"Mom, I don't really like you. You should know that. I've always wondered why you're always so weak, so cowardly."
"He clearly doesn't know anything, he's an alcoholic, he's idle and lazy, yet why have you always tolerated him? It makes me dislike you so much, I don't like going home, I don't like communicating with you, I've closed myself off."
Su Qing observed Su Rao's expression, her fingers gently taking Su Rao's fingers.
Her hands held no warmth, no strength, as if she was recounting a story.
Su Qing spoke in a low, slow voice.
"Until, for my sake, he stabbed you by mistake, and he went to jail. From then on, it was just you and me in our home."
"I just thought, even though I don't like you, I still have to protect you."
Su Qing's eyes were completely filled with tears. She seemed oblivious to the fact that she was crying, her gaze still fixed on Su Rao.
"I just thought, my mom isn't that weak after all. Weakness might be in your nature, but that doesn't give me reason to hate you. Later, I learned that my mom was also a little girl, afraid of pain, but every time he got angry, you always protected me."
The past flashed through Su Qing's mind like a movie, replaying uncontrollably.
"You just don't know how to love yourself. You're afraid. Afraid that I'll be bullied, afraid that I won't have enough to eat, afraid that I won't be warm, afraid that I won't have enough tuition fee, afraid that you'll get sick and use up all my tuition fee."
"You can't be like this. You're all I have left, Mom."
Su Qing completely collapsed. Her voice was so loud, as if she was trying to let out an outburst. She bit her lip, clutching her lips tightly, and growled.
The person lying on bed remained motionless, unable to respond to Su Qing.
"Mom, please wake up."
Everything Su Qing tried, from her initial sobs to her final growls to her final pleas, was futile.
She cried her heart out, but it was no use.
After an unknown amount of time, she lay beside her bed, slowly raising her head. Su Qing looked at Su Rao.
"Mom, don't worry about me. I can take care of myself. I won't be bullied."
With tears streaming down her face, Su Qing wiped her tears with the back of her hand and tugged hard at a strand of her hair.
"Mom, don't be afraid. Your daughter will be with you wherever you are."
The girl's eyes were bright. She stared straight at Su Rao, then slowly covered her with the white cloth. She felt her heart pounding violently, enduring the pain.
Su Qing glanced at Su Rao one last time, then pushed her wheelchair and slowly walked out.
The dark, lonely feeling behind the girl stung Jiang Sui deeply as she emerged.
Jiang Sui pursed his lips, looking at Su Qing's red, swollen eyes, swollen like walnuts from crying. He lowered his head and stood behind the girl without saying a word.
"Can go back to the ward?"
Her face was not looking good, paler than before, and she looked weak and shaky.
Su Qing pinched her palms, forcing herself to hold on a little longer. She looked at Mei Yeqin, not far away.
"Auntie Mei, thank you."
Su Rao had clearly been tidied up by someone. She'd applied make up and changed her clothes, things she should have done herself.
Mei Yeqin pinched her fingertips, feeling a pang of pity for the girl's pale face.
"Go back to the ward and get checked out first. Qing Qing, you can't be in any danger, understand?"
"You're everyone's hope."
Mei Yeqin pursed her lips. She wanted to say you were your mother's last hope, but she didn't want to remind the girl of such a sad memory, so she changed her tone.
Su Qing nodded, not refusing.
But Su Qing finally can't hold before returned to the ward, she had already fainted.