While the two Kianas battled for the moral high ground within their shared mind, the real Mo Wang was caught in the middle of a literal tug-of-war.
The streets of Sapphire City were graced with a picturesque scene: a stunning silver-haired beauty in trendy clothes strolling alongside a cute, gray-haired Loli in adorable attire.
However, in reality, Mo Wang was feeling nothing but dread. Far from holding his hands, the two of them seemed intent on pulling him apart limb from limb.
The two girls, one deceptively petite and the other a certified Valkyrie, were pulling on his arms with a force that would have dislocated a normal human's shoulders. Were it not for the Preservation Path's steel-reinforced bones, things could have gotten very graphic.
"So, Kiana," Bronya said, her voice deceptively casual as she continued to pull, her small frame leveraging a surprising amount of force. "The Bronya heard you have been... cohabitating with the Captain. Has your cooking improved? Or is the Captain surviving on takeout and nutrient packs?"
"My cooking is none of your business!" Sirin snapped back, feeling a flash of indignation.
"Actually, the Captain likes to cook for me! He says my hands are too beautiful to be ruined by kitchen work!" The lie came out so smoothly it even surprised her.
"I see," Bronya said, her voice dropping a few degrees. "So you are just a freeloader. The Bronya is merely concerned for the Captain's health. Living with a paramecium who considers burnt toast a delicacy must be taxing on his system. He is probably exhausted from having to care for a useless parasite."
"At least I don't hide from my responsibilities by dressing up like a suspicious person!" Sirin shot back, her voice rising. "What are you, a fugitive? Did your company finally go bankrupt from making terrible games?"
The passive-aggressive (and physically painful) conflict continued as they slowly made their way towards the distant, cheerful silhouette of Homu Land. 'Kiana's' dignity was being systematically dismantled, her arguments growing weaker and more childish with each exchange. She was losing, badly.
Finally, with a frustrated growl that sounded more like a kitten's hiss, she looked at Mo Wang with pleading, teary eyes.
"Mo Wang! Do something about this annoying dwarf!"
Mo Wang had had enough. He wanted his date. He wanted to go to Homu Land and see 'Kiana' in those special outfits. What he didn't want was a repeat of the disastrous "Love Fighting Tournament."
He stopped walking, planting his feet firmly on the ground, which forced both girls to a halt.
"Bronya," he said, his voice calm but firm. "Stop teasing her." He then reached into his bag and pulled out the shining, unopened box of the Homu Grand Melee Collector's Edition.
"I know you want this," he said, holding it out like a sacred offering.
Bronya's eyes, once glinting with mischief, now blazed with the raw, holy light of a gacha addict finally pulling their hard-earned 5-star at pity.
"I'll sell it to you," Mo Wang continued. "For the original price. On one condition."
He leaned in slightly. "Leave. Us. Alone. For the rest of the day. Please."
Bronya's gaze darted between the holy relic in his hand and the fuming 'Kiana'. She was about to mention that Kiana had invited her and the others too, but then she saw the state 'Kiana' was in: flustered, red-faced, and looking utterly defeated.
The Idiotka seems... off today, Bronya thought. Her defensive and offensive capabilities have decreased significantly. She looks pathetic. The Bronya will take pity on her this once. Besides... this game is too valuable to pass up.
With the speed of a striking viper, Bronya snatched the game from Mo Wang's hand. "Deal," she declared, her face returning to its usual emotionless emoji.
"The Bronya has... urgent company business to attend to. Enjoy your... 'not-a-date'."
Bronya shot Sirin one last smug look before walking off, clutching the game box like it was pure gold. The second she was out of sight, she whipped out her phone and opened the "St. Freya Tea Party" group chat.
Sirin watched her go, a mixture of relief and lingering anger swirling within her. She then turned to Mo Wang, her expression puzzled.
"Why did you do that? You spent a whole month's salary on that... that relic. Isn't it priceless to you?"
Mo Wang looked at her, a soft, genuine smile gracing his lips. He reached out and gently brushed a stray strand of silver hair from her face.
"A game is just a thing," he said, his voice quiet but clear. "It's not as important as making sure my girlfriend isn't sad."
And I really, really want to see you in those special outfits~
...
After that devastatingly effective sweet-talk, Sirin had run off in a flustered panic. She was now standing near the entrance gate of Homu Land, fanning her burning cheeks while trying to salvage her plan.
She opened her phone to search for other candidates who weren't the loli midget, all while fending off Kiana's mocking laughter in her head.
"Haha! You ran away! You totally ran away!"
"Shut up! I was just creating strategic distance!"
Half of her, that Conquest lightning gem, emm what her name? Mei! that Raiden Mei, was a good candidate. It was clear Mei also liked Mo Wang, and as a Herrscher, she could definitely satisfy his monstrous stamina.
When she saw the flood of unread messages, Sirin felt like she'd hit the jackpot. But after opening them one by one, she was met with a string of rejections, all sent at nearly the exact same time.
Mei:I'm so sorry, Kiana-chan! I have to help Dr. Tesla with some experiments today. Maybe another time! ❤️
Ana:My apologies, Kiana-san! I on mission this time. I hope you and Mo Wang-san have a wonderful time! 🙏
Fu Hua:I have supplementary lessons to attend. Please enjoy your day.
And Wendy... well, Wendy had apparently blocked Kiana's number entirely. (Sirin think Himeko too old, Theresa emm she just don't want add her)
Why did they all reject her at the same time? It was too coincidental.
She was alone now. 'Kiana' on a date alone with Mo Wang? There was a strange, fluttering feeling inside her that made her want to do this... but Sirin quickly dismissed it, thinking it was just a leak from the idiot vessel.
But at the same time, thinking about the idiot, Sirin was bothered by one thing.
"Hey, Kiana. Why are you so calm about this? I've been actively trying to set your boyfriend up with other girls. Aren't you supposed to be jealous or angry? What do you mean you just kept quiet when your boyfriend was about to be stolen by a vixen?"
Kiana's laughter echoed in her mind. It wasn't the usual cheerful laugh; this one had a hint of smug, tyrannical superiority.
"Jealous? Why would I be jealous? I am the Empress. They are merely concubines vying for favor. It is amusing to watch them try."
"What...?"
"Of course, they have to pass my test first," Kiana continued, her tone becoming dangerously playful. "Take Mei, for instance. I want her! If Mo Wang wants another woman, and that woman is Mei, then I get Mei too! It's a win-win for the Imperial Family!"
Sirin was speechless. this idiot want harem for herself?!
"And Bronya,"Kiana's voice turned colder. "I'll allow her to enter the harem, but she has to perform a naked dogeza in front of me and beg for my forgiveness. She must show a proper level of allegiance to the Empress."
"You... you're a pervert!!" Sirin shrieked mentally.
"As for the others, they have their own trials. But there is one absolute, unbreakable rule," Kiana declared, her voice suddenly devoid of all humor.
"As long as it's not Wendy."
"...What?"
"As long as it's not Wendy,"Kiana repeated, her mental voice laced with a chilling venom Sirin had never heard from her before. "I will allow Mo Wang to find other women. But not that bitch. Never her."
"...What?"
Sirin was left utterly speechless, the phone feeling heavy in her hand.
She had intended to create a simple "haha you get cucked" plot for this idiot Tuna.
She had not expected to discover that the Tuna was apparently living in a dark, twisted Chinese harem-conquest drama while also taking on the role of the Evil Tyrant Empress.
The mind of her vessel was a terrifying, terrifying place.