It's official. I hate my phone.
It's been three days since Aisha gave me Jasper's number. For three days I've thought about texting him. But every time I start typing something I feel so stupid.
I type and delete, type and delete.
Everything I write feels so idiotic and pathetic. What am I going to say? "Hi, Jasper, it's Max. Remember me? The mate you rejected? Well, I'm just texting to say I haven't stopped thinking about you, even though you're a total jerk."
I'm starting to wish Aisha never gave me his stupid number.
Every night I lie awake composing texts in my head until they don't even make sense anymore. I'm the worst texter in history.
I'm lying on my bed in the afternoon, glaring at my phone which I've tossed onto a pile of dirty clothes in the corner. If I squint hard enough maybe I could destroy the damn thing with the power of my mind. I concentrate all my energy, picture it blowing up in a little puff of smoke. I squint harder...
The screen lights up, giving me a freaking heart attack!
It can't be, can it?
Have I summoned Jasper with the power of my mind?
Pull yourself together, Max.
I force myself off my bed and sneak slowly to the laundry pile.
I grab my phone and sigh with relief when I see that it's just a text from Katie. She's asking if she can come round for dinner.
I shake my head and let my shoulders drop.
You're being ridiculous.
I text Katie back, glad to have a distraction for the evening.
"Sorry I've been a bit AWOL," Katie says, picking a daisy out of the grass. We're sitting on the steps of my back deck looking down at the forest as the sun sets.
"It's fine," I lie and shrug. "You just found your mate, I'm sure you've been getting very busy."
Katie's face turns cranberry pink.
"Max! It hasn't been like that we haven't...we haven't done that yet."
"Hey, no judgment here," I say, leaning against her to let her know I'm only playing.
"We've talked about it and I told him I wasn't ready just yet and he's being really understanding."
"Well, good for Todd. I didn't know he had that kind of self-control."
"Don't be mean," she says, knocking her knees into mine and pushing me off balance.
"I'm sure Todd is a complete gentleman," I say, trying to sound earnest.
"Actually," Katie says, looking away. "I asked to come over because I wanted to tell you something."
She's acting all coy and I have no idea why. Only that she's got the same look she had when our fourth-grade teacher caught us stealing gummi bears from the jar on her desk. "Katie, what is it? You can tell me."
"The thing is I haven't been hanging out with Todd."
"What?"
"I've actually been seeing...Simon."
"Whoa," I say, leaning back to take a good look at the stranger next to me. Katie has always been so straight-laced. Stealing candy was about as rebellious as she got. And she's always been keen on the idea of having one person in the whole world that she's meant to be with. For her, this is...this is wild.
"The thing is he lives so much closer than Todd who's stuck doing college prep on Long Island and he texted me one night and asked if he could hang and it must have been the mating bond or leftover effects from the blue moon because I said yes and we started hanging out and we just clicked and it's been so nice and do you hate me?"
Katie stops ranting and takes a breath. Her cheeks have turned from cranberry to beet and her eyes are getting misty.
"Hey, of course I don't hate you? What's that about?"
"Back at the festival I chose Todd, in front of everybody, and he's such a nice guy but I haven't seen him since then and, well, Simon is super sweet and funny and a really good kisser."
"Look you don't have to explain it to me, the mate bond makes people crazy."
"But do you think I'm like a big slut or something?"
I stare into Katie's crystal-blue eyes. She looks terrified. As if I'm going to judge her for following her natural impulses. As if I haven't been driving myself crazy staring at a boy's phone number.
"Katie, I could never think that about you."
"Are you sure?"
"Of course," I say, taking her hands and squeezing. "You have two mates, that's not every day. No one could blame you for exploring or being confused."
"I guess..." Katie sniffs back a tear. "But the thing is I kind of think that about myself."
Two tears stream down her face, leaving a shiny trail behind them, and I grab Katie and pull her close to me. I let her cry on my shoulder for a moment, rubbing her back.
It seems like you can have too much of a good thing. Looks like this whole mating ordeal is messing with Katie as well.
"Listen," I say into her hair, "according to our culture, you're supposed to spend the rest of your wolfy life with this person. And unlike most wolves, you've been given options. No one could blame you for wanting to make an informed decision."
She laughs but doesn't let me go.
"It's not a science experiment," she says.
"It kind of is. Anyway, it's not slutty to be into two guys at once.
Hell, we're teenagers! If we were human it would almost be a prerequisite."
Katie laughs again.
"Thank you," she says, sitting back and wiping her face with the sleeve of her cardigan. "I knew you'd understand. And sorry..."
"What are you sorry for?!"
"For crying all over you," she giggles. "And for making all this fuss about having two mates when you didn't find yours."
My heart rate increases. I still haven't told Katie the truth about what happened at the festival. About me and Jasper.
"I mean I know you didn't want one and everything but still…" She continues and I start to sweat because I know I can't hide it from her any longer. Not after she's been so open and honest with me. And not when my phone is still burning a hole in my pocket.
"I don't want to seem like I'm rubbing it in your face or whatever––" "I found my mate!"
I slam my mouth shut. Those four words sit between Katie and me like a window. Will she hoist it open or shut the blinds?
"You...found your mate?" she asks.
I swallow and gulp down a ball of saliva.
"Ahuh."
"Max, but you didn't say anything? What? How? Who?" Katie looks like a curious owl, her eyes are so big.
"Well, remember how when Todd and Simon were fighting I came to find you?"
"Yeah, of course, and you showed up with Jasper...you and he...wait, Max...is it...no. Did you...is Jasper your mate?"
I bite my lip and wait as realization dawns.
"You're mated to Jasper!?"
If I speak right now I'll probably burst into tears––so I nod.
"But is that even possible? He's a...a…" "He's a boy," I say, finally finding my voice.
My jaw wobbles and I crack my knuckles.
"But…" Katie stops herself, her mouth hanging open. "Oh."
There it is. The truth. Katie is staring at me like she doesn't recognize me. Like I'm a completely different person than the boy she grew up with.
My whole body is shaking. Adrenaline is pulsing through my veins at maximum volume. There's nothing I can do now except sit and wait to see if I still have a best friend.
"Max," she says quietly. "Why didn't you tell me?"
"I didn't know if you...I didn't know what you'd think."
She does this weird half laugh-half sob thing and then she smiles, big and wide, and toothy.
"Max! You found your mate!"
Katie grabs me by the shoulders and pulls me in for another awesome best-friend hug.
When we pull apart Katie is crying but I know they're tears of joy "I'm so happy for you!" she sobs. "I think it's wonderful!"
Playfully, she punches my shoulder.
"What's that for?" I ask, laughing as well now.
"You should have told me!"
"I know I just wasn't sure how you'd react."
Katie calms down a little and takes my hands. She gives me that big, earnest stare of hers and leans forward.
"Max, I love you. You can tell me anything."
For the first time since the festival, I feel a little bit of weight leaving my chest. Keeping this from Katie has been stressing me out more than I ever knew. But I'm so glad she knows now and that she's cool with it. I guess I shouldn't have doubted her. "I know," I say. "I should have told you right away. The thing is I'm in uncharted territory with all this mate stuff and I never even learned how to sail."
"So, talk to me now. What's he like? Have you been hanging out?
Have you met Alpha Jericho?"
I shake my head.
Katie tilts her head to the side like a confused puppy. "Why don't you seem more excited?"
"What?"
"You found your mate but you're acting like nothing happened.
Wait, didn't Jasper leave the festival early?"
I glance at my shoes.
"Oh, Max. Tell me everything."
Once I start talking I can't stop.
I tell Katie all about the Mating Run, and the night after––about Jasper's kiss and run.
I tell her how he wants nothing to do with me but that I have his phone number and I don't know what to do.
"Give me your phone," she says, holding her hand out flat.
"What are you going to do?"
"Just give it to me."
I figure after three days, if I haven't been able to decide what to do with Jasper's number, I might as well put my fate in Katie's hands. At least they're the hands of someone who cares about me, who I can trust.
I hand her my phone.
Katie––who obvs knows my passcode––unlocks the phone and starts swiping about. Before I know it, she hands it back to me and I look down at what she's done.
In an otherwise empty chat screen, she's sent Jasper a message. All it says is: 'Hi, Jasper. This is Max. Can we talk?' It's simple and to the point and kind of perfect. Nothing like the rambling, overshare-y, totes-emosh things I was planning on sending.
"There, now it's his problem," Katie says.
But I can't take my eyes off the screen. I keep waiting for a dialogue box to appear, for those three torturous little dots to show up. But nothing comes.
"Maybe he'll just ignore it," I say, shrugging.
"Just wait," Katie says, rubbing my knee.
"Kids! Dinner time!" my mom calls from the back door.
Dinner is roast chicken, with crispy potatoes and salad and it smells so good. I place my phone face up next to my plate, still tingling with anticipation that any second the screen might light up.
"No way, kiddo. No phones at the table," Mom says.
With a sigh, I slip my phone back into my pocket.
"So, Katie," Dad says from across the table. "How did you find the festival?"
"Yes! Tell us about the festival," Mom joins in. "Max hasn't told us anything."
Katie glances in my direction.
Please don't out me to my parents!
"It was great!" Katie says, turning from me to my dad with a casual smile.
"And your new mate? His name's Todd, isn't it? How's it going with him?" Mom asks.
"Actually," Katie says, looking at her plate and fiddling with a spud.
"His name is Simon now."
"Oh," Mom says, sitting back to process this new information.
"Well, the more the merrier!"
Mom laughs awkwardly but I can tell she's doing her best to be supportive.
"Double mates are a rarity," Dad says, sipping a glass of red wine.
"I read a book about it once, tricky business. Still, it must be nice to have a bit of choice."
"Sorry you got stuck with me," Mom says sarcastically to Dad.
"I'm still figuring it out," Katie says, desperate to change the subject. "This chicken is delicious!"
After dinner, I help Mom stack the dishwasher. Once it's full I flick it on and am about to head back into the dining room when she stops me.
"Are you alright, kiddo?" she says, leaning back on the kitchen counter with a tea towel draped over one shoulder.
"Huh? Yeah," I say, shrugging.
"I'm worried about you," she says. "Since the festival you've been a bit...off. I'm wondering if it has anything to do with Katie and her mates."
"Mom." I roll my eyes. "I'm fine. I'm happy for Katie."
She squints at me as if she's trying to use x-ray vision to see into my brain.
"Okay, kiddo."
Moon Gods get me out of here. I make a dash in the direction of the living room.
"You'd tell me if something was wrong, wouldn't you?" she asks before I can zip away.
For a split second, I stand frozen in the kitchen wondering if maybe I should just come out and say it. Maybe she'd be as understanding and supportive as Katie. Maybe it would lift even more weight off my chest.
I open my mouth, unsure of what I'm about to say when the doorbell rings.
Both Mom and I stay where we are, listening as Dad opens the door.
Muffled conversation drifts in from the living room but I can't make it out.
Suddenly, Dad clears his throat loudly and calls out. "Max, there's someone here to see you."
I glance back at Mom totally confused, but she shrugs and gestures toward the living room.
On my way to the door I lock eyes with Katie who is sitting on the couch. Why does she look so freaked out?
Something weird is going on.
A strange feeling creeps into my body. I'm feverish. My fingertips are sparking.
I step into the hall and stare at the open front door.
Oh...my...Moon Gods.
Jasper Apollo is standing on my front porch.
What in the teen wolf is happening? I never even imagined he would show up here. But what's even more shocking, disturbing even, is how he looks.
His hair is ruffled and unkempt, his white t-shirt is wrinkled, half tucked in and half out. There are dark circles under his eyes and a serious, stern look on his face.
He's usually so put together, so void of emotion. Something is definitely up.
I reach the doorway and I don't know what to say. Part of me wants to reach out, and hug him because I can feel how stressed he is. But part of me is scared. Why is he here? What is my family going to think?
"Jasper," I finally croak. "What...what are you doing here?"
He lifts his head and I'm startled by how bloodshot his eyes are. Has he been crying?
"I need your help," he says. "Aisha is missing."