??? POV
"-en… R..n…"
"Nnngg…"
"Ren–! Wakey-wakey!"
Poke poke
"Hmm… if you aren't going to get up, I think I'll join you in there ehehe~"
At those words, he jolted awake.
"I'm up!"
"Tch, couldn't you have at least pretended to sleep a little bit longer?"
A cold sweat trickled down the boy's back.
"Aha…"
"Well, anyway, I made breakfast, so let's eat together, okay?"
Poke poke
"Sure, I'll go down in a minute… so could you stop poking my cheek now?"
"Ehhh?! But it's so soft…"
Pout
'It's hard to believe that the woman crouched down in front of me is turning 24 this year…'
Pinch—!
"You just had a rude thought, didn't you?"
"Not at all, I was just thinking about how lovable and perfect you are, sister."
"Cough, cough! Ahem–! Flattery won't get you anywhere!"
Or so she said, but her lips betrayed her, curling upwards.
"Let's go eat."
"Okayyy."
••✦ ♡ ✦•••
"Thanks as always, Sister, it was the best. I'll wash up."
"Hehe~ If you're that thankful, why not gimme a hug~"
'If anyone else saw this, I think her entire image would be ruined…'
"...I'll wash up now."
"Boo-hoo-hoo, I'm going to cry, what happened to my cute little Ren who used to beg me to hug him. Give him back, you fiend!"
The boy pinched the bridge of his nose.
"Hahhh… Will you shut up if I do?"
"Mhmm!~"
Squeeze
"Ehehe~"
"Do you really enjoy it that much?"
"Of course I do~ I'm getting a hug from my cute little brother after all! Don't lie, you like it too."
"..."
'Obviously I do, but how can I say that out loud…'
Knock knock!
"..."
"..."
"..."
"...Shouldn't you get that, Sister?"
"Tsk."
"Sister?"
"...Fine."
Grumble grumble
"Pfft."
Creakkk—
"Letter here for a Miss Freya Arden."
"That's me."
"Ah, great, here you go. I'll be on my way now."
Click
As the door closed, Freya sat back down, staring at the wax seal.
Her expression tightened.
"..."
The boy peeked over her shoulder and asked,
"Who's it from, Sister?"
"...Home."
"Ah.."
Home.
A word heavy enough to sink the room into silence.
Sensing his unease, Freya stroked his hair.
"It's okay, it'll be fine. You go back to your room for a bit whilst I read this. It shouldn't take too long."
Even when she was upset, she still reached out for him first.
He wanted to help, but he already knew how useless he was.
The only thing he could think to do… was something she always seemed to love.
Hug
"Ren–?"
"Thanks for everything, Sister, I love you."
Her cheeks flushed red.
"R-Ren?! W-What are y-you saying?!"
Squeeze
"I'm always here for you, Sister."
She trembled.
For just a moment, he thought he saw the cracks in her mask.
"Ah- T-Thank you, Ren, I love you too…"
••✦ ♡ ✦•••
Days passed, and no matter how many times he hugged her, his sister only grew worse.
'I really am useless…'
He wanted to ask what was wrong, he wanted to demand answers, but every time he opened his mouth, fear strangled his voice.
So he said nothing, cowardice was easier.
Until this morning.
Like usual, the siblings sat at the table, eating breakfast together, when his sister suddenly began speaking with a serious expression.
"Hey, Ren."
"Yes, Sister?"
"My next mission has been decided. This'll be the last."
He blinked.
That wasn't what he expected her to say.
"Isn't that good news though?"
"...Yeah."
Something in her tone sent a shiver down his spine, but he smiled anyway, pretending not to notice.
'It's fine. Everything's fine… right?'
"Hey, Ren. Do you like living with me?"
"Huh? Of course."
"...What do you think of returning home?"
"Oh… uhm, I'm fine with it as long as my sister is there."
It was a lie.
He was terrified of going back, but he didn't want her worrying more.
"..."
"Hey, Ren?"
"Yes, Sister?"
"What do you think about going to Stellaris Academy?"
'Eh?'
"So suddenly? I mean, I don't know, wouldn't that mean I wouldn't be able to see you?"
There were many reasons why he was surprised by such a suggestion.
Reasons such as his lack of talent in almost every academic field.
But right now, the most important thing to him was the fact that he wouldn't be able to see his sister.
He knew how Stellaris Academy worked, thanks to his sister's attendance, and he remembered how difficult those four years apart were.
'I don't want to do that again..'
"...I think it would be a good place for you to go, you could make some friends, see the world, have—"
"—But I don't need any of that, Sister? I've already told you, you're all I need."
He cut her off before she could finish.
Her lips trembled.
"I- Ren…"
'Why is she acting so weird?'
Of course, this wasn't the first time she had asked him about his future, but the way she was talking, the look on her face, the tears in her eyes.
Everything about their conversation felt strange to him.
"...Sister, what was written in that letter?"
She froze, then forced her lips to part.
"Nothing."
"Then why are you acting so weird?"
"It's nothing, but Ren, can you promise me you'll at least think about the academy?"
Silence stretched, he could have pressed her, could have demanded the truth, but his heart pounded, screaming at him to not ask.
"...If that makes you happy."
"Thank you, Ren."
Hug
"Thank you so much."
She trembled in his arms, fighting back tears, and he did nothing, he only held her tighter, praying it would be enough.
That night, muffled sobs bled through the walls.
••✦ ♡ ✦•••
The morning she left…
"Ren… look after yourself, okay?"
"Of course, Sister. So please come back safe."
"..."
She smiled faintly.
"Sister?"
"Ah- Of course I will, who do you think I am! I'm Freya Arden! Hehe~ Reliable, right?"
"...If you didn't add that last part."
"Ehe~ My bad. Anyways… I'm off."
As she turned to leave, something the boy had heard the other night suddenly came to mind.
– 'Sob, I'm so sorry, Soren, please don't hate me. Sob.'
"Wait—!" He chased after her, his legs trembling. "Do you have to go?"
She stopped.
For a moment he thought she might stay.
But it was only a moment,
"Of course I do, silly."
She wrapped her arms around her lovable brother and hugged him tightly, stroking his head gently.
"Don't worry, Ren, everything will be alright."
Then she brushed back his bangs and pressed her lips to his forehead.
"I love you, Soren. You're the reason I've been able to get this far."
His throat closed.
"Why are you acting like this…"
"I-I'm sorry."
And then she was gone.
Something felt off.
He wanted to chase after her, but his legs wouldn't move.
It was pathetic.
He was pathetic.
He already knew that something was wrong, but he was too scared.
He was afraid of discovering the truth.
He was scared about what was going to happen.
Only when she vanished from sight did he whisper.
"I love you too, Freya…"
That night, a knight came by and told Soren that Freya had fallen victim to a demon's trap and perished honourably in battle.
••✦ ♡ ✦•••
Bang–!
"Screw this! Honorably? What's so honourable about dying?"
He felt miserable.
"Why! Didn't! She! Tell! Me!"
Bang! Bang! Bang!
The table shattered beneath his fists.
'I don't get it.'
"Why…"
Thud
He crumpled, choking on sobs.
"Am I really that useless…? I told you all I needed -sob- was you…"
He clutched her axe.
Still stained, still warm with death.
'It's cold… I'm cold…'
He wept until sleep dragged his consciousness away.
••✦ ♡ ✦•••
Two weeks blurred by.
He still felt lost.
Everywhere he looked, she was there.
The kitchen where they would cook together.
The dining room, where they would discuss their days and share silly jokes.
The bedroom that she always snuck into to tease him.
Her laughter haunted every corner.
"I... should eat…"
He pulled the dirty covers from his body and got up from his sister's bed, the axe she had always carried with her trailing behind him, stumbling towards the kitchen.
Even the food that was stored was thanks to her; she always kept the cupboards filled to the brim, even going so far as to hire someone to use preservation magic so that Soren would never go hungry.
– Make sure you eat a lot, okay! You're still a growing boy!
Tears burned again.
He shoved bread into his mouth, anything to stop himself from crying.
Knock knock!
He made his way to the door, munching on bread and almost falling over a few times in the process, then threw it open, speaking in a hoarse voice.
"...Hi."
The man outside flinched at the sight of his filthy, hollow-eyed appearance.
"...Mr Soren Arden?"
"Yes."
"Here—"
Soren grabbed the letter that the man held out before slamming the door.
Turning the letter around, his eyes sharpened.
'The Arden Seal.'
It was a letter he had been expecting, but he still wished it hadn't arrived.
His only memories of the family were awful, and thanks to his memory, which lets him perfectly remember everything, he can't forget even if he wants to.
Still munching on the bread in his hand, Soren slumped down against the door and roughly tore open the letter.
– To Soren, I have heard the news about my beloved daughter Freya…
He skipped past all of the formalities and found the important part.
– Since the previous heir of the household has passed away, we have selected a new heir, that being Alice Arden, your younger sister. I hope this choice doesn't hurt you and that you continue to enjoy playing around as you have been…
Rip rip
Not even bothering to finish the letter, he tore it to pieces.
He couldn't stand to read any more of it.
The way she insinuated that he was playing around caused rage to flow through his body.
But that anger was short-lived, quickly replaced with a feeling of emptiness.
The letter had stated that although Soren was the next oldest after Freya, he hadn't even been given a chance to become heir; his mother had even gone as far as to exclude his family name from the greeting.
It was practically a statement of abandonment.
He stared blankly at his wreckage around him.
The table that used to be there was now smashed to pieces, scattered randomly around the room.
The floor was covered in dust and dirt from the lack of cleaning.
There were random scraps of food everywhere.
It was filthy.
His own appearance was even worse, however.
The clothes hadn't been changed in two weeks, clinging to his sweat-covered body.
His greasy hair was tangled entirely.
The misshapen nails, thanks to his nervous biting.
He was pathetic, always so pathetic.
'What do I do now…'
He knew he couldn't live like this forever.
Then a memory resurfaced.
– What do you think about going to Stellaris Academy?
– ...I think it would be a good place for you to go, you could make some friends, see the world…
Her voice had been soft but first, planning for him even as she had her own circumstances.
'Stellaris Academy…'
He hadn't bothered giving it much thought when she first recommended it, but now that things have turned out this way, he didn't know what else to do.
His family had abandoned him, and he had only enough money to last a few more months at most.
"I guess I'll be following your last request then, Sister…"
His voice cracked.
"But you should've told me. I could've—"
He stopped himself.
He couldn't lie anymore.
He was a coward.
Soren let out a bitter laugh as he leaned against the door.
"I'm sorry," his voice was hoarse, but the tears no longer fell.
————「❤︎」————