At the start of the new term, the students were all brimming with confidence, determined to outdo the Disciplinary Squad. After all, there were so many students in each House, and only a handful in the Squad.
They quickly realized how very wrong they were.
In Charms class, Miss Granger, the so-called know-it-all, answered almost every question Professor Flitwick threw out. The professor was so thrilled that he kept giving her House points.
In Transfiguration, it was Miss Granger again. She monopolized all of Professor McGonagall's questions and spell demonstrations. Thankfully, Professor McGonagall was more restrained than Flitwick with her point-giving.
In Potions, Harry Potter and Draco Malfoy's rivalry meant they managed to steal some points from Professor Snape. But then Snape took points from Gryffindor for Harry, which was a bit much, though no student dared question the Potions Master.
Even in Herbology, the most unassuming member of the Squad, Neville, was constantly racking up points from Professor Sprout.
And then there was a certain Gryffindor boy named Robert, who managed to get a few points in every single class.
As for Mr. Dursley, he barely raised his hand this year. But if a professor called on him, he could answer their questions with unnerving accuracy. There seemed to be nothing he didn't know.
Even the History of Magic class, which could put anyone to sleep, had fallen. Professor Binns had practically become a personal point provider for the Squad, supplying them with an endless stream of House points.
In just a few days, the Disciplinary Squad had amassed more points than the other four Houses combined, crushing the competition with an overwhelming display of dominance.
The Disciplinary Squad was truly terrifying!
This only strengthened the admiration of students who already looked up to the Squad.
This went on until Friday.
On Friday, it was the first Defense Against the Dark Arts class of the semester, and it was a joint class for Gryffindor and Slytherin.
Inside the Defense Against the Dark Arts classroom, the lingering scent of garlic from last semester had mostly faded, but a faint, distinct smell still remained.
No one knew what brand of garlic Quirrell had used, but it was strong enough to stick around forever.
"One more game of Wizard's Cards?" a Gryffindor student suggested.
Another Gryffindor, though tempted, refused. "No way. Professor Lockhart will be here soon. No time for another round."
Wizard's Cards had now replaced Wizarding Chess and was even threatening to overtake Quidditch as the favorite pastime of Hogwarts students.
If adults couldn't resist the fun, how could a bunch of kids?
Everyone at Hogwarts was a fan of the game; nearly every student had their own deck, even the Slytherins.
"I promised to earn points for Gryffindor," one student said confidently. "Don't worry, I've memorized all of Professor Lockhart's ways of defeating his enemies. This time, no one else will steal the spotlight."
He glanced in Dudley's direction as he spoke. Other subjects were one thing, he thought, but he definitely wouldn't lose in Defense Against the Dark Arts.
"It's a huge gap; just forget about it. We might as well play another game of Wizard's Cards," the first Gryffindor muttered quietly, turning back to his game. He had been just as confident until he was completely shown up by Neville's extensive knowledge of Herbology. He had given up then and there.
If he couldn't even keep up with Neville, what was the point of trying to compete with the others? He was a simple boy and whatever happened to the points didn't matter to him.
Lying low felt so much better.
"He's here! Professor Lockhart's here!" someone shouted from outside the classroom. The students, who had been chatting amongst themselves, quickly scurried back to their seats to await their new Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher.
Perhaps to make a good first impression, Lockhart's outfit was, for once, not as flashy as usual. It was only, in his opinion, a very humble and stylishly flamboyant pinkish-purple number.
Lockhart walked into the room, saw the students all sitting neatly, and nodded in satisfaction. He cleared his throat, picked up a copy of Travels with Trolls, and held up the book so everyone could see the winking photo of himself on the cover.
"Me," he said, pointing dramatically at his own photo and flashing a brilliant, pearly-white smile. "Gilderoy Lockhart, Order of Merlin, Third Class, Honorary Member of the Dark Force Defence League, and five-time winner of Witch Weekly's Most Charming Smile Award—but I don't talk about that. I didn't get rid of the Bandon Banshee with a smile!"
Despite claiming he didn't boast about his awards, he rattled off his entire list of accomplishments.
"I see you've all bought my complete set of books... excellent. I think we'll start with a little quiz today."
The Gryffindor who had been so eager to earn points earlier, Haney Watt, had his eyes light up at the mention of a quiz.
"Don't worry... it's just to see how well you've read them, how much you've absorbed."
Lockhart pulled out a thick stack of papers. It was a written quiz. He quickly handed them out and returned to the front of the classroom, leaning on his desk. "You have thirty minutes. The best answers will be rewarded with points!"
"This time, I'll get the points for sure," Watt thought to himself. "I've memorized all of Professor Lockhart's combat techniques. I'm going to get a perfect score."
Watt confidently flipped his paper over and picked up his quill.
One minute later... he was still holding the quill, unmoving.
Three minutes later... still in the same pose.
After five more minutes, he gave up trying to think.
The questions on the quiz were indeed about Lockhart, but not in the way he had imagined. They were nothing to do with Dark Arts. The questions were: 1. What is Gilderoy Lockhart's favorite color? 2. What is Gilderoy Lockhart's secret ambition? 3. What do you believe is Gilderoy Lockhart's greatest achievement to date? 54. What day is Gilderoy Lockhart's birthday, and what would be his ideal birthday present?
What in the name of Merlin's beard were these questions? How did they have anything to do with Defense Against the Dark Arts?
Watt was so furious he wanted to eat the paper.
But then he calmed down. I don't believe you guys in the Disciplinary Squad can answer these either. If you get a perfect score, I'll eat this desk with salt on it.
Half an hour later, Lockhart collected the quizzes and began looking through them in front of the entire class.
"Tsk, tsk... this is truly disappointing. Almost no one remembers my favorite color. I mentioned it in Year with the Yeti..."
Lockhart seemed displeased with the results, but his disappointment soon turned to surprise. "I'm surprised to see that one quiz got a perfect score! Almost every question was answered correctly! Let's see which clever student this is."
Lockhart's excitement grew as he read the name on the paper.
"Dursley? Dudley Dursley."
Watt was completely defeated. He had to hand it to him!
From that day on, Gryffindor had one less student trying to earn points and one more student who spent his time as a slug, playing cards all day.