Lowell say alone in a white room. Eyes open, unmoving, he tried to process where he was—and why there was nothing, no one.
Even someone as used to solitude as he was began to feel a quiet ache of loneliness.
"Is anyone there?"
He hadn't expected a respond, but black magic began to rise softly from the floor. It should have been frightening, but Lowell smiled faintly. It reminded him of someone he'd grown used to.
"Is that you, Grand Duke?"
He reached out to touch the black magic. It moved with utmost care, as if to show it meant no harm.
"Still, it's less lonely with you here."
The magic slowly grew, taking shape. Lowell brushed his hand over it and muttered, "A black cat?" But she shape forming was larger, sturdier.
"A jaguar?"
Lowell picked up the small, young black jaguar that had formed. It nuzzled into him, it's gentle blue eyes full of affection. It pressed it's head repeatedly against his cheek.
"That tickles."
He quickly realized it was a dream about the child in his womb.
"Kkomul... Why did you wait so long to show up? I thought you weren't coming."
Until now, he hadn't felt especially attached. But now, holding it—even if only in a dream—he felt a strange tug at his chest. Tenderness. Affection.
"If I'd known you were this cute, I'd have treated you better."
He'd barely gotten pregnant, caught a cold, and then stabbed. It couldn't have been an easy time for the child either.
"Ending up in the body of someone who never even imagine pregnancy... must be a lot to deal with, huh?"
His voice was soft with quiet regret. With everything else happening, he hadn't taken time to truly think about the baby.
I chose to keep you...I should've cared more. Maybe, deep, I was still resisting the idea.
The jaguar seemed displeased by his tone and rubbed it's head against Lowell's belly with a whine.
"Huh? Where are you going?"
After a long stretch of cuddling, the jaguar suddenly stood and nudged his leg with it's body. It was urging him to leave.
"See you next time."
Lowell held the image of the little jaguar in his eyes as he stepped forward. As he walked, the dizziness returned. The urge to turn back and check one last time gnawed at him.
He stood still, hesitant—until a voice called out from somewhere.
"Lowell."
Someone was calling him. The voice was desperate, like a prayer.
"Open your eyes, Lowell."
Without resistance, Lowell walked toward it.
Someone is waiting for me.
He wanted to end that painful, desperate wait—even one second sooner.