I awake to the feeling of an elephant sitting on my chest, its hard to breath and its burning up in here, I can barely see and in front of me seems to be an elderly man holding a massive syringe. He looks mildly concerned I think, next to him is a woman with purple hair and a massive eye. Leela, I think, so that makes the old man professor Farnsworth. its hard to force my mind to think everything feels slow and difficult. I hope it's just the fever and not my brain that's the problem. Fry didn't seem to have a learning disability in the show he just seemed immature, and lazy, but seemed to pick up on things pretty quickly. Soon the professor jams the syringe straight into my sternum and everything starts clearing up room starts cooling down the pressure starts coming off my chest, my eyes are clearing up, and my thoughts are speeding up. Okay so just lazy and immature I can work with that. A smile comes onto my face the moment I realize that with just a quick jab by a syringe I was almost completely over a virus that could have proved to be deadly. Man, I love the future.
"Professor if it's all the same with you I think I should get some inoculations to the most common types of illnesses."
"Dr Zoidburg will handle that Fry I'm a professor not a doctor. Ill introduce you to him after you have recovered enough for the inoculations." I smile and thank him then I close my eyes to get some rest I feel Leela patting my shoulder. She must have been the one to find me. Well, I owe her props for getting me to the professor in time. Sometime later I wake up and see bender sitting next to my bedside.
"Hey buddy come to check on the feeble human?"
"Fry your awake…. uh I suppose you'll be wanting your wallet back." I chuckled and hold out my hand. As far as I remember fry isn't really that hard up for cash so I don't even bother with how much he has probably taken out of it. Seeing bender in real life is pretty weird he's got a grey metal casing but his legs and arms look like they're made up of interlocking metal rings. I would love to get into creating my own robots, and I probably will with my plans.
Speaking of my plans I should probably get up, I start to stand and pull on my pants, shirt, and that hideous red jacket with a smile.
"Hey bender want to go watch some tv?" he looks at me a little confused that I didn't say anything about the wallet or even glare at him but agrees, we head over to the staff room and turn on the tv sitting on the couch I head over to the refrigerator and grab a six pack of beer and a snack since I don't drink beer, but I know bender does, we turn on the tv and for the rest of the night we watch all my circuits dear god is it a horrible show arguably worse than the soaps from back In my time but it's like a train wreck its awful but you can't look away, pretty sure it's some kind of mind control like the hypnotoad, later bender finishes off the 6 pack and heads home. Now that I'm alone I have time to check out my boon, and since she said it's something I've always wanted I figure there's only one thing it could be.
"Status"
Philip j fry
Title: Man out of time.
(note, 10 is the average limit of humans. Mental and Metaphysical stats pulled from life)
Strength: 7
Dexterity:6
Durability:10
intelligence:10
Charisma: 3
Available points:10 (Note, 5 Points will be assigned upon level up or 5 upon one year of life.)
Well, I might as well allocate my allotted points this isn't a battle manga there's no point in saving them for later and I while I don't really need it, It would be cool to be peak human, and to fix my apparently very low charisma score.
Philip j fry
Title: Man out of time.
Strength: 10
Dexterity:10
Durability:10
intelligence:10
Charisma: 6
Available points: 0
I can feel my body changing in small ways and I can feel myself growling more comfortable in my new body, I do some stretches, head to the bathroom to check out the results, one my body seems a lot more toned, but not to a noticeable degree, I have more of a swimmers build than a body builders, that's something I can appreciate, I also notice that when not being animated fry is actually fairly attractive. Medium length red hair, going to change that, not the length the red hair it looks good on women not on me. A strong jaw line, a little bit of a whispy beard, with a stronger goatee, going to shave that, and clothes that definitely need a change, but overall, not a bad canvas to work with, and tomorrow I'll have the money to make some changes. I head back into the employee lounge and lay down on the couch and just play with my system until I fall asleep, I did find out that this thing has an internet function its hooked to the internet of my time which is great since apparently most of the movies and tv shows of my time have been lost in the three separate times aliens and bender destroyed the earth. That made me really happy I would have really missed the MCU…well up to end game. After that Disney got a little ehh. Anyways I spent the rest of the night before falling asleep scrolling on the internet.
The next day everyone came in and it was time to introduce us to Hermes, zoidburg, and Amy. I already knew who they were but it wouldn't be remiss to see what they look life in real life. Though this isn't quite how I remember it happening in the show but I guess I can't rely on my foreknowledge for everything.
Hermes was a typical overweight man from Jamaica, he had tightly wound dreadlocks and a greenish brown two-piece suit that fit snugly on his body, he had a welcoming smile and slightly yellowish teeth. he got us to do some onboarding paperwork. I had to get myself legally declared alive again, which is actually a process most talking heads have to go through, but soon it was added onto my career chip along with all my information. Bender was re-registered from property of the suicide booth construction factory to an all-purpose robot for planet express's use. While Leela had to do some finagling to get her career chip to hold her information like her social security number, her id, her passport, her licenses, and name. it was a while before we were done with bureaucratic work.
Next, we meet doctor zoidburg and there's no real way to describe how he looks in real life, only the literal revulsion I feel looking at his face for too long with those floppy disgusting mouth tendrils, his raw stench, and his dirty carapace. I could live with him looking a little differently but the smell and obvious lack of a shower in at least 2 years was a big thing to overcome, he was kind enough if a little arrogant. He did have the immunizations I needed on hand though so it all evened out a bit, I made him sterilize the needle twice though because he keeps touching it with his filthy claws. Leela got a regular check up to be declared fit for action as the captain of a starship, and bender spent 5 minutes trying to convince zoidburg he wasn't human. Idiot.
Then there came the love of my teenage life, Amy, she had big hair that probably took at least an hour every morning styling it…. wait no never mind they had nanobots to style and cut hair in specific patterns in the future. That's really cool. She wore a pink track suit and had a small beauty mark on her cheek; she had the typical features of someone from Chinese descent. Small eyes a button nose, a lithe body, she was a beauty, she didn't really have anything we needed to do and bender failed at pick pocketing her twice, Leela already seems to have a rivalry with her making a snide comment about ditsy scientists, which is interesting I didn't realize that started this early, and I thought it was one sided on Amys part. Seems like Leela started it when confronted with someone more attractive than her. Eh what can you do.
next we were all gathered in the situation room, sans zoidburg and Hermes, eating breakfast, caffeinated bacon, baconated grapefruit and admiral crunch. It's all so weird the bacon tastes awful because it has the remnant taste of coffee something I hate, the grapefruit taste weird bacon doesn't belong on fruit, and finally the admiral crunch I take a bite and its actually just captain crunch with a new name I'm not really surprised but I am disappointed, maybe archduke chocula will taste better. After we finish breakfast Hermes come in with a large box.
"This was dropped off here last night for delivery. Which one of you is the captain." He asks
"Ooh I haven't picked a captain yet its always so hard to choose.,"
Unlike the original fry I'm completely un interested in becoming the captain so I keep my mouth shut I have plans and I can't have work getting in the way of them. Bender is completely disinterested and just burps fire. While Leela has taken it upon herself to sign for the package. The choice was pretty easy.
"Leela you will be the new captain of the planet express ship." Hermes takes her away for some more paper work. Dear god there's no escaping that stuff.
(Upon re-read I realize I had stated Leela was the captain earlier, but deleting everything would break the chapter in ways I'm not skilled enough to fix so you get this nonsense instead.)
Soon Leela comes back with Hermes. Since we've already been given our checkups, and immunizations, and meet everyone else it's all we have to do is wait for the professor and Amy to finish cleaning out bender.
"Dear god bender your filthy" the professor says.
"Yeah, like you don't have crap in your neck." Bender replies swiftly causing me and the professor to chuckle.
"Amy why don't you give his body a going over with the cleaning pick."
"Okay." She replies.
"Leela I'd advise you to step back." She does so just before Amy nails her in the eye with the cleaning pick.
Things continue onwards as they do in the show before I get a chance to start a conversation with Amy.
"Hey you're that unfrozen guy. I heard you nearly died."
"Yeah, the future is apparently full of viruses that my people had no defense against. should have a warning at the cryogenics place."
"I'm Amy Wong." She offers her hand and I take it.
"Nice to meet you I'm Philip J Fry" I reply with my best smile.
"Wait a minute" Leela starts. "Amy Wong from the mars wongs."
Amy looks startled and a little down trodden "We're not as rich as everyone says."
"Oh, really what sorority are you from" Leela replies smarmily.
"Kapa kapa Wong" she replies embarrassed.
"Wow" I reply trying to cheer her up. "I only have 4.3 billion in the bank.
"Wait fry your rich too?" Leela asks.
"Well, I did the math last night. while I was poor in my century with compounding interest I have over 4.3 billion dollars." I say matter-of-factly causing Leela to gape like a fish.
"If I recall correctly, you youngsters got a package to deliver." Professor Farnsworth comes in. breaking up the conversation.
"So where's the package going." I say not giving up that I already know where it's going."
"Nowhere special just the moon." Leela says dismissively. So far, I do not have a good opinion of her.
"Hmm professor, do you have some spare Eva suits." I ask while Amy goes over to Leela to ask her if she could come.
"Oh, my yes but why?" professor Farnsworth replies.
"Well, I want to try to find the original moon landing sight and from what I read last night the Eva suits provided at the park don't have enough oxygen to last for that trip as well as the poor temperature regulation. Also, I have no interest in going to a monument to capitalism that spreads misinformation about the people from my time being whalers of the moon." I say with an eye roll. Causing Leela to perk up
"OH really I don't see you with a fungineering degree" she says rolling her eyes, and I hold back my urge to slap her…. maybe later.
"That's not a real degree and the story behind how humans first went to the moon is far more interesting than some half-wit hunters trying to find whales in space." I say and just ignore her. Professor brings the Eva suits and I store them in the ship. I brought three but I know I'll only need 1.
Everything is ready and we get on the ship in just a few moments were already at the moon amazing that it took people from the 20th century hours to get here. Just go to show you how big space is and how much technology has changed. Leela says she want to deliver the package professionally, and bender of course demands we check out the theme park. Leela gives in and agrees, but I speak up.
"Actually, I'm going to use the Eva suit I got from professor Farnsworth to find the original moon landing sight." Leela rolls her eyes but just ignores me.
Amy however is just as interested as me.
"Can I come?" Amy asks with a smile, and I nod
"Sure, the more the merrier, two eyes are better than one after all." I smile and we both suit up.
Leela instead of leaving Amy with the keys takes them herself so they don't fall into the package.
Bender has no interest in going with us so it's just me and Amy this time. That's fine by me though bender can get a little much sometimes, still a great guy to hang out with, but having breaks from him is nice.
As me and Amy get out of the ship and start walking the opposite direction of the park I use the internet feature on my system and with a quick gps search I can find the original moon landing spot because its in the sea of tranquility same place as the theme park Guess there's not a lot of flat open ground to build a theme park, and the original creators didn't know how close they built the theme park to the landing sight well close is relative it's a 12 mile hike. Should take about 3 hours if we walk. Which isn't that surprising since fry and Leela had a rover but has to walk most of the way to the landing sight.
With some confirmations were going the right way I tell Amy this.
"Hey Amy, the original landing site is about 3 hours away."
"That's fine its not like were going to get tired from a 12-mile hike in low gravity. You did remember to bring something to contact Leela and stock the suits with water though, right?" she asks warily.
"Yep, I don't want to die out here either." I laugh.
"So why did you get so hopped up about the way humans originally got to the moon?" she asks her tone a little amused. At least from what I could tell.
"Well, I guess it come from my pride of being a human. The struggles, the lives lost, and the mistakes we made along the way are all part of what helped up get to the point were at, and forgetting those things is like losing a piece of who we are. I'm proud to be a member of a race that crawled its way out of the primordial pool and stabbed everything on It way to the top. I'm proud of the progress we've made, but if we forget the mistakes we've made, we could easily forget what we've learned from them." I said going on a bit of a tirade realizing this I felt embarrassed but Amy looked intrigued. Right, she was an engineering student and a scholar.
"So how did humans go to the moon. It must be noble for you to get all bent out of shape about it." She asks with a smile.
"Hah not even close no we did it because we wanted to prove the superiority of capitalism over communism" I said and she was shocked.
"So, wait it was all over economic policies?" she said confused.
"Well, it all started at the end of World War 2 when we dropped the atomic bomb on Hiroshima and Nagasaki that pretty much ended the war but our allies the soviet union pretty quickly turned to enemies because of aforementioned economic and social policies. You see the United States had a problem, the Russians had recently acquired and were testing atomic bombs. Some bigger than anything In our arsenal, so in order to prove their superior logistics they sent a satellite into space.; the first satellite put In orbit mind you. well now America was worried if they could put a satellite into orbit what else could they put in space. It was a logistical flex; we have the power to bomb you and you can do nothing about it. So, America trying to keep up with what was affectionately called the space race by the people of that time, started their own space program ran by N.A.S.A because they had already technically lost the space race. They had to come up with a way to one up the Soviet Union. That way was to send a manned team to the moon. The soviet union wasn't standing still though they managed to put a man in orbit, and send a probe to the moon, all in the time we were trying to organize, soon we matched them by putting a man by the name of Alex Shepard into space but not into orbit, later we sent the first Apollo mission into space but that was a failure as 3 men died in a fire on their craft. But in December 1968 apollo 8 was the first manned craft to orbit the moon, and then on July 16 1969 we finally sent the lunar landing mission Apollo 11 and the first man to ever step on the moon was an American astronaut by the name of Neil Armstrong effectively winning the space race for America, or at least that's what the Americans say." I said finishing the story with a joke.
"Wow that's way more interesting than a bunch of sweaty dudes coming here in a spaceship to hunt whales." Amy replies, I laugh and agree, we spend the next three hours going through small talk and comfortable silences. Just enjoying each other's presence. I find Amy to be a really cool person to hang out with. Soon we come up on the lunar lander sight. Unfortunately, Matt Groening didn't have any creative liberties with the universe so the lunar lander isn't here, still Neil Armstrong's footprints are still in the regolith I don't act like an idiot and deface them like fry. From where we are we get a really good view of earth as a giant blue and green vision, with half of it being darkened by the moon, Amy smile and asks me
"Is it everything you hoped for fry."
"Definitely. And I'm glad to share this sight with a new friend." I smile back at her. We stay there a little bit just talking and enjoying the view but sooner or later our communicator rings with Leela asking us where we are. I send her our location and the planet express ship shows up. Leela gets out of the ship and is caught of guard by the view Amy and I have been enjoying for 30 minutes now. She smiles for the first time we've meet and everyone including bender who got kicked out of the theme park and went on to bang the crushinator, all spend some time and enjoy the view I give them the same story I gave Amy, and from the look on Leela's face she finally understands why I was so prissy about the theme park.
Then we hear it rolling which is confusing but when we look over, we see a farmer with a laser rifle we know it's time to go everyone hops into the ship and Leela takes off we head back to earth. All in all, it's been a good trip, less craziness but I don't need craziness to enjoy something. not that I'm against it.
When I was going to bed that night, I did a nightly check on my status
Philip j fry
Title: Man out of time.
Level:6
(note, 10 is the average limit of humans. Mental and Metaphysical stats pulled from life)
Strength: 10
Dexterity:10
Durability:10
intelligence:10
Charisma: 7
Available points: 5
it seems that I got a level up for finishing the delivery and visiting the moon landing site. Welp, I know what I'm spending them on
Philip j fry
Title: Man out of time.
Level:6
(note, 10 is the average limit of humans. Mental and Metaphysical stats pulled from life)
Strength: 10
Dexterity:10
Durability:10
intelligence:10
Charisma: 10
Available points: 3
What the fuck it wont let me add onto my strength or my dexterity, let me try
Philip j fry
Title: Man out of time.
Level:5
(note, 10 is the average limit of humans. Mental and Metaphysical stats pulled from life)
Strength: 10
Dexterity:10
Durability:10
intelligence:13
Charisma: 10
Available points: 0
so that's what's going on I can't extend past the physical limits of a human, well no worries I have plans for that anyways. In fact, having the ability to grow my body stronger naturally would only have made me indecisive. As I lay down and start scrolling through the internet from my world again, I feel my eyes growing heavy time to sleep.