Shimura Danzō, in a fit of rage, raged.
He very nearly stormed into the Hokage's office to slam the desk in front of the "Fourth brat" and bark: "What do you think you're doing?!"
"Wipe out the entire Uchiha!"
"They're an evil clan—how can you reuse them?!"
"Listen to me! My decisions are the only ones that maximize Konoha's interests!"—and so on.
But on his way, Danzō suddenly remembered: this wasn't Sarutobi Hiruzen's Hokage era anymore.
He had no real rapport with Minato Namikaze, who wouldn't indulge him.
If he barged in spouting deranged lines, Minato would strip his status, power—everything—without hesitation.
After all, the shinobi world isn't "the whole realm is your daddy." If not for the Third shielding him—clinging like an overprotective guardian—Danzō's combination of lofty airs and meager ability would've gotten him killed eight hundred times over.
If you asked Uchiha Yorin, he'd say Danzō turned out this way because the Third spoiled him.
"Namikaze Minato. The Hokage…"
At that thought, the darkness in Danzō's heart thickened.
"Only if I become Hokage can I truly protect the village's interests."
A line nobody outside Root would believe—yet today Danzō still wallowed in that consuming self-delusion.
…
Meanwhile, in the Hokage's office, Minato finished the entire paper.
Aside from the front-page "Clan of Love" feature, most of it was gossip and fluff—Killer B's impromptu rap, Sasori's puppet show, that sort of thing.
An ordinary reader might be delighted.
But as Hokage, Minato had lost the right to enjoy tabloids.
He skimmed the rest, confirmed there was nothing critical, then focused entirely on the cover story—rereading two lines over and over:
"As long as the village gives the Uchiha more love, the Uchiha will return it tenfold, a hundredfold."
"If you treat the Uchiha as comrades in earnest, they will treat you as comrades and give you their all."
"Yorin…"
"This is what you wanted to tell me, isn't it?"
He sighed, and that "guy in blue" flashed through his mind again.
"Uchiha."
"Obito."
"I hope I'm making the right choice."
…
Stripped to its core, Yorin's plan was simple: give the Uchiha a tsundere persona—not the modern "all tsun, no dere" kind some masochistic writers peddle, but the old-school kind: I worked myself to the bone to hand you every benefit, scrubbed clean and ready—i-it's not like I did it for you or anything.
That kind of tsundere.
At the same time, Yorin would brand the Uchiha as beautiful–strong–tragic: people who value friendship.
Tsundere may be past its peak, but "beautiful, strong, and tragic" never goes out of style.
Everyone loves a beautiful, strong, tragic figure.
If you want better relations with the village, with the Hokage's inner circle, with other clans—this New Konoha Times was Yorin's pledge of allegiance.
Regardless of whether he one day becomes the Senju's son-in-law who bites the hand that feeds, for now his surname is Uchiha. The Night of the Massacre still hangs over him like the Sword of Damocles.
This issue of New Konoha Times was meant to turn that hair-thin thread into a rope—at least reinforce it a bit.
And beyond that, any future revival of the Senju would need the Uchiha's help.
You can't conjure a revival out of thin air; you need people, money, and clout.
Where do those come from?
From the Uchiha, of course.
Yorin's plan was to bind the "new Senju" and the Uchiha together completely—like Uzumaki and Senju once were—or even merge: become "Sen–Uchi," or "Thousand Hands of Paper Fan" (Senju + Uchiha).
…
Out by the forest on the village outskirts, in a small print shop, Uchiha Yorin mused:
"By now everyone's probably furious. Here's hoping they won't kill me, for the sake of me being the new generation's top genius."
He ran through his plan again—saw no holes—then flashed a bright grin at the buddy across from him. "See, Shisui? I told you we'd do something big together."
Uchiha Shisui opened his mouth, then closed it.
There were so many spit-take moments in that one sentence he didn't know where to start, so the gentle, passionate, slightly naïve boy made a simple choice:
Stop thinking and just smile.
…
New Konoha Times was a long-brewed project—part of the plan to flip the Uchiha's fate.
He obviously couldn't pull off something that big alone, so he enlisted Uchiha Shisui.
They weren't particularly close, but no matter: as soon as Yorin said, "I've got an idea—low risk, big payoff; it'll help the clan and the village get along,"
Shisui howled to join. "Please let me help—let me contribute!"
And so he became Yorin's unpaid laborer—working overtime, gathering stories all over town—without a single overtime bonus.
…
Beyond that earnest kid who truly wanted the village and the clan to get along, there were 500 ninja cats hustling around.
Some manned the presses, loading ink and paper; some stacked finished papers; others clamped copies in their jaws and delivered them door to door.
Yorin was broke—he couldn't afford an entire print shop. Luckily, the Uchiha had clout.
The Uchiha–ninja cat pact let him summon those clever little helpers.
His costs? A few dried fish, some silvervine liquor, and a lot of petting with-the-fur. Ten times cheaper than hiring real printers, and no labor laws to worry about—perfect.
"…"
That, too, shocked Shisui to the core—holy crap, you can do it like this?
So shocked he didn't know what to say—so he settled again on: just smile.
"Next, let's see how the Fourth responds," Yorin told Shisui. "Many hands make light work; a new broom sweeps clean. If he knows which way the wind's blowing, he'll answer."
Honestly, he'd simply gotten lucky with the timing—Minato was still alive.
If he'd arrived after the Nine-Tails incident, there would only be eight characters: "Cast off illusions, prepare for struggle."
By then, there'd be nothing left to talk about between the Uchiha and the village leadership—the spiral of suspicion would be plunging into the abyss. If you don't want to die, get ready to fight.
But for now, with Minato alive, there was room to maneuver.
This time, Shisui couldn't stay quiet. "It'll work!"
"Yorin-nii's plan is flawless! We will make it! Once it's in motion, everything will get better!!"
Yorin met his eyes solemnly. "Yes. I think so too, Shisui. Everything will get better."
"Yorin-nii!"
"So, Shisui," Yorin said, squeezing his shoulders, "you're willing to give everything for the village and the clan, right?"
"Of course!"
"Then you handle this next part. I'm going to slip out."
"Huh… huh?"
In a blink, Yorin Body-Flickered away. Shisui had just thought, Yorin-nii, your Body Flicker is really something, when hurried footsteps closed in—and a chorus of very familiar voices:
"Uchiha Yorin! You bastard, get out here!!" —the clan's men, young and old.
Having had their tsundere streak exposed, they were livid—and coming to kill you.
Shisui: "?!?!"
"W-wait—!"
…
In Year 50 of Konoha, the Fourth Hokage issued his first Hokage Order:
The Mission Desk would allocate a share of missions specifically to the Uchiha clan—as a gesture of goodwill and an effort to win them over.