However, Cohen didn't plan to return immediately.
In broad daylight, a Dementor drifting from the sea towards Azkaban was like going home, but drifting from Azkaban towards the coast was a terrorist attack.
So Cohen decided to return under the cover of night.
After leaving the prison area with prisoners, Cohen found an empty room on the top floor.
Over the centuries, everything that could be taken from this fortress had been looted, even the floor tiles had been stripped clean. Cohen guessed that the original owner, the mad wizard Extis, had carved runes on the floor, making it a valuable heirloom.
Putting down his suitcase, Cohen prepared to crawl inside to kill some time.
Sunlight, open grasslands, rivers, and caves.
After crawling into his suitcase, Cohen felt like he had returned to the human world—the scenery of Azkaban was all dark and dilapidated. Although the atmosphere of the Dementors made Cohen feel comfortable, staying there for too long would lead to aesthetic fatigue.
Because the Count absolutely refused to fly into Azkaban with Cohen, even Cohen's explanation that normal Dementors wouldn't attack animals was useless, so Cohen could only put him in a box.
The Count should be in Cohen's house now—Ari was there too. Cohen wondered if the two had fought again; he remembered the Count and Ari had always been somewhat at odds, mainly due to their language barrier and the Count's sharp tongue.
"Squeak—"
Cohen pushed open the door and went in.
The Count wasn't in the living room—but there seemed to be some movement in the study where Ari was.
Had they fought?
Or…
Cohen had a bad feeling—the Count had been unlucky in love for a long time, and now he and Ari were alone together…
After Cohen entered the study, a series of chain reactions immediately occurred, including but not limited to an invisibility spell being overused, causing an entire wall to disappear, revealing Norber's Cave and the empty sheep pen outside. The Count nervously spread his wings, seemingly about to do something, while Ari nervously changed from a lying position to standing up—
"Why is your son back so soon?!"
the Earl exclaimed in alarm to Aly.
[Didn't you say you were going to do something big?]
Aly avoided Cohen's gaze.
"Don't pretend you're having an affair. I smell butterbeer," Cohen said coldly. "Besides, having an affair isn't much better than stealing alcohol."
[I really couldn't resist!]
Aly protested.
"I was just trying!" the Earl tried to justify himself. "I just had a bad experience with love!"
"Is Hedwig the only female owl in all of Britain?" Cohen asked fiercely. "Don't make your failed attempt at being a simp sound so noble!"
"And you, Aly! I didn't use a commanding tone to tell you to quit drinking because I thought we should build a harmonious and loving community! After all, it's not like disobeying is a death sentence—"
Cohen turned to Aly and continued.
"Do you think I'm stopping you from drinking because I'm afraid of spending money?"
[No, isn't that right?] "
I'm protecting your physical and mental health!" Cohen said, exasperated. "What kind of evil creature is a drunkard! And you're getting drunk more and more easily! This means your resistance to alcohol is decreasing—which is quite different from other creatures. Others' resistance increases with drinking, but yours increases. If this continues, you'll soon be corrupted by this stuff, turning into the last nightmare in the world, wandering aimlessly until I humanely destroy it."
"You mean I can drink now?" the Earl asked curiously. "My alcohol tolerance is increasing—"
"Drinking damages the kidneys," Cohen said calmly.
The Earl's expression turned horrified.
"I care about you all so much, and you all just ignore me," Cohen said disappointedly. "Nober is the only one who's sensible; he only eats one sheep each time I give him—"
Cohen's words trailed off as he suddenly realized something was missing from the box.
Cohen looked out at the wall that had been made transparent by either the Earl or Ari—it faced Nober's cave and the empty sheepfold.
The sheepfold was empty…empty…
"It's not much better than us either," the Earl said wickedly. "You have to admit, pets aren't so easy to raise."
A moment later, Nober, Ari, and the Earl lined up outside the house according to their size.
Norber, as if apologizing, nudged a charred sheep toward Cohen with his head, then carefully placed his two front legs in front of him before lowering his head—
"You fucking moved me!"
Cohen swore, unusually.
"But I raised over three hundred sheep for you! And you ate them all?! How many days has it been?!"
"How can I afford to raise them like this? What kind of lives do other dragons lead? Sleeping in their caves every day and only eating once every few months. Isn't it enough for me to let you eat three or four sheep every day? Don't you understand sustainable development? You should at least leave a couple!"
"And you, you wiped out over three hundred in one meal? What are you planning to do? Try to get the sheep bones to mate and produce lambs for you to eat? Playing the pitiful card won't work. I'm a Dementor, I have no feelings!"
Norber was like a kitten admitting its mistake—but Cohen knew it "knew it was wrong, but it will do it again next time."
"Eating over three hundred a day, you'll be sleeping in your cave for the next six months. There won't be any food for you after that."
"And you, Earl, stop laughing like that. You can drink whatever you want, but if you become infertile, I won't take you to the doctor."
"Ariel, you—"
[I'm your mother]
"Then I'll inject you with some of my blood. I'm still your father."
Cohen retorted.
"Use your job title during work hours, no networking. I called you 'Mom' last time because the 'Mom's Charge' move was cool. No more drinking. Find a healthy hobby that other normal unicorns have."
[They all like drinking now too]
"…"
—After
training the three pets, Cohen resisted the urge to kill them all.
None of them were easy to manage, all disobedient, especially Norber.
He had originally planned to create a perfect food chain of "sheep eat grass, dragons eat sheep, dragons poop, and poop nourishes grass," but Norber couldn't control his mouth.
So the plan changed; he would starve him for a while to teach him a lesson.
Ari and the Earl's stolen butterbeer was confiscated by Cohen, who also gave them a stern warning.
Leaving this cozy place, Cohen, now back in his Dementor form, returned to Azkaban.
But this time, a new Dementor Cohen had never seen before appeared outside.
It looked smaller than the others—Cohen had assumed all Dementors looked exactly alike.
[Dad?]
"???"
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(End of Chapter)