Warm coffee… that's all Lei Hua wanted. One cup. Just one cup to keep
herself awake during office hours.
"Ah yes, sweet energy—"
**SPILL!!!**
The coffee splashed across the keyboard like a tiny brown tsunami.
"Huh? No—nononono—computer, don't die on m—"
**BZZT. POP. WHITE FLASH.**
And then darkness.
—
Lei Hua opened her eyes to see—
A wooden gate. Lanterns. Ancient architecture.
And a giant plaque: **"Mansion of Minister Lei Ming."**
"…Ah. I'm dead. Coffee killed me. How embarrassing."
A bell-like chime rang inside her skull:
**[SYSTEM: Host has safely transmigrated.]**
"SAFELY?! I died by caffeine explosion!"
She clutched her chest dramatically, but the gate guards were the ones
panicking.
"She's awake!"
"Is that Second Young Miss?"
"Go call the minister! The household! The dogs! The deity!"
"Why the dogs—"
Too late. A stampede of servants rushed out like a flood.
—
### ❀ ENTER THE LEI FAMILY CHAOS ❀
The main courtyard erupted as the Lei family ran out.
Minister **Lei Ming** arrived first, serious, calm, dignified—
Then he saw her.
"My Hua'er?!"
He lunged forward with the energy of a man half his age.
Behind him:
His wife, Lady Ming, panicking.
Their son **Lei Tian**, in armor, shouting.
Their adopted daughter **Lei Rong**, pretending to weep.
The youngest **Lei Yue's** empty seat (she's away).
And the moment they saw Lei Hua—
**DOOM. COMPLETE SILENCE.**
"…Is she real?" Lei Tian whispered.
"Maybe we summoned her with our longing?" Lady Ming trembled.
Then Lei Hua, trying to calm everyone:
"Um… hello? I can explain—"
But she couldn't explain. Because she didn't know.
She was just trying not to cry.
**And then her thoughts slipped out:**
*"Wow… this family is really good-looking. Even the dad is handsome—"*
All five good-hearted members froze.
"???"
Lei Ming: "Did… someone hear that?"
Lady Ming: "I thought it was my imagination."
Lei Tian: "Whose voice was that? It praised Father??"
The elder sister: "Strange… I heard it too…"
Auntie Lin: "Me too…"
Lei Hua blinked.
"Why are you all staring at me like I'm dumplings you want to steam?!"
*"Seriously, if everyone is this pretty, then how ugly am I—wait no,
I'm the heroine reincarnated! I should have protagonist halo!"*
Lei Rong's lips twitched.
"…Who keeps saying that?!" she snapped.
But the family ignored her.
Instead, they surrounded Lei Hua like a precious artifact.
—
### ❀ LEI RONG BEGINS HER SHENANIGANS ❀
The adopted daughter, **Lei Rong**, squeezed fake tears.
"Hua'er! Are you feeling unwell? Shouldn't you rest? I will handle the
household matters—"
*"Oh great, a fake white lotus. She has villainess eyebrows. Why is she
touching me? Ew."*
Lei Rong stiffened.
"WHO SAID THAT?!" she barked.
Lei Tian rubbed his ears.
"…Sister, calm down, it's probably the wind."
"That's not WIND, idiot—!" Lei Rong snapped.
Lei Hua leaned back, horrified.
"I didn't say anything aloud!"
*"Wow she's acting guilty. Suspicious. Maybe SHE spilled the coffee and
sent me here. Yes, totally her fault."*
Lei Tian blinked.
"Did someone just blame Rong'er for a coffee… whatever that is?"
Lei Rong screamed internally.
"I HEARD IT AGAIN!!"
But the rest of the family looked confused, concerned, and strangely
amused.
"Poor Rong'er," Lady Ming whispered. "She must be stressed."
Lei Rong nearly fainted.
—
### ❀ THE GOSSIP SYSTEM AWAKES ❀
A soft ring echoed in Lei Hua's mind:
**[SYSTEM: Host, please calm down. Your thoughts are very loud.]**
"My thoughts?! Loud?! People don't hear thoughts!"
**[SYSTEM: Correction: good-hearted individuals may hear thoughts at
random intervals due to world settings.]**
"WORLD SETTINGS?! Since when is life DLC?!"
**[SYSTEM: Host may use gossip detection in order to survive.]**
"What kind of system are you—"
**[SYSTEM: WARNING: A liar is within 1 meter.]**
Lei Hua slowly… very slowly… turned her head toward Lei Rong.
Lei Rong, sweating, trying to smile:
"Hua'er… let's go inside…"
*"Yep. She's evil. Classic."*
Lei Rong flinched again.
Lei Ming frowned. "Rong'er, did you hear something?"
"I— NO— YES— MAYBE— AHHHH!"
She ran.
The family stared.
Lei Hua scratched her head.
"…So… should I say hi again?"
The entire Lei family burst into chaotic yelling:
"Bring water!"
"Call the physician!"
"Prepare a feast!"
"Is she possessed?"
"Is she hungry?!"
"Hua'er, tell Father again that he's handsome!"
"WHICH PART OF THAT DID I EVER SAY OUT LOUD?!"
*"I mean he IS handsome but that's not the point!"*
Lady Ming gasped.
"I heard it again!!"
Lei Hua died inside.
—
### ❀ END OF CHAPTER 1 ❀
A normal transmigration?
No.
A peaceful arrival?
Absolutely not.
By the end of the day, the entire Lei mansion was convinced:
**Either they were hearing divine whispers…
Or Lei Hua was the funniest omen the heavens ever sent.**
And Lei Hua?
She crawled into bed.
*"…If tomorrow is like this, I'm jumping into a well."*
**[SYSTEM: Host, please do not.]**
"YOU CAN HEAR MY THOUGHTS TOO?!"
**[SYSTEM: I live in your brain.]**
"GET OUT!!!"
And so began her chaotic five-day introduction to ancient life.