Information in the Shinobi world usually traveled by hawk, by scroll, or by the hushed whispers of spies in tea houses.
But some stories traveled by fear.
It had been two weeks since the incident in the Land of Lightning. Two weeks since the Raikage's dock was shattered and the Eight-Tails had cowered in its cage.
The incident was supposed to be classified. Top secret. The Raikage didn't want the world to know his Tailed Beast had refused to fight a civilian.
But you can't hide a storm. Sailors talk. Merchants talk. And terrifyingly, potatoes talk—specifically, the ridiculous Jolly Roger flying on a stolen sloop that was cutting a swath through the eastern oceans.
The rumor started as a trickle, then became a flood.
"Did you hear about the Ghost of the North?"
"The One-Armed Demon?"
"They say he drinks sake with Kages and cuts oceans in half."
"They say he has no chakra, yet the Tailed Beasts fear his shadow."
The name began to appear in the black markets. In the Bingo Books, handwritten notes were scribbled in the margins next to Zabuza Momochi's entry.
Accompanied by Red-Haired Shanks. Threat Level: Do Not Engage. Run.
Konohagakure: Ichiraku Ramen
Naruto Uzumaki was aggressively inhaling his third bowl of Miso Chashu Ramen.
"It's true!" Naruto yelled, spraying broth. "I'm telling you, Old Man Teuchi! He was this tall! And he had a cool cape! Well, a sash! And he just looked at the bad guys and they all went to sleep!"
Teuchi chuckled, slicing pork. "You have a vivid imagination, Naruto. A pirate who knocks people out with a look? Sounds like a fairy tale."
"It's not a fairy tale!" Naruto insisted, clutching the small wooden ship carving that hung around his neck on a string. "Shanks-nii is real! Ask Sasuke! Ask Kakashi-sensei!"
"I believe you, kid," a gruff voice said from the entrance.
A tall, bulky man with long white spiky hair and a red vest walked in. He had a hitai-ate with the symbol for 'Oil' and carried a massive scroll.
"Pervy Sage!" Naruto shouted. "You're back!"
Jiraiya the Toad Sage sat down next to Naruto. "I'm back. And for once, your loud mouth isn't exaggerating."
Jiraiya ordered a sake and looked at his student. His expression was unusually serious.
"I was in the Land of Hot Water yesterday," Jiraiya said quietly. "Gathering... research."
"Peeping on girls!" Naruto corrected.
"Research!" Jiraiya coughed. "Anyway. I heard stories. Sailors coming from the Land of Lightning. They were shaking, Naruto. They talked about a ship called The Red Potato."
Naruto snickered. "He named it the Potato?"
"They say the captain is a red-haired man with one arm," Jiraiya continued. "They say he walked into Kumogakure, arm-wrestled the Raikage to a draw, made the Eight-Tails Jinchuriki forfeit a match out of pure fear, and then raided their pantry for burgers."
Naruto's eyes sparkled. "That sounds just like him! He loves food!"
Jiraiya leaned back, looking at the ceiling. "The Raikage is a monster, Naruto. He's the fastest man alive right now. If this Shanks guy matched him in physical strength... without chakra... he's an anomaly. A dangerous one."
"He's not dangerous!" Naruto slammed his chopsticks down. "He's my friend! He saved us from Gato! He taught me to be strong without relying on the Fox!"
"I know," Jiraiya smiled gently. "Kakashi told me. I'm just saying... the world is noticing him, Naruto. And when the world notices someone that strong, they usually try to break them."
Naruto gripped his wooden ship tight. "Let them try. Shanks-sensei will just flick them away."
Otogakure: The Sound Village
Deep underground, in a laboratory lit by flickering torches and the glow of preservation tanks, Orochimaru stood over a dissection table.
"Report," he hissed, his voice like sliding gravel.
Kabuto Yakushi adjusted his glasses, stepping out of the shadows. He held a clipboard.
"The network is buzzing, Lord Orochimaru. It concerns the Missing-Nin Zabuza Momochi."
"Zabuza is a blunt instrument," Orochimaru dismissed. "He is of no interest to me. I have better swordsmen."
"It's not Zabuza," Kabuto corrected. "It's his new master. A man named Shanks."
Orochimaru paused. He set down his scalpel. "Go on."
"He appeared in the Land of Waves. Interrupted Zabuza's mission. Then he traveled to the Land of Iron, where he reportedly subdued a squad of Kiri Hunter-Nin and recruited a local eccentric doctor. Most recently... he was seen in Kumogakure."
Kabuto flipped a page.
"The spies confirm that the Hachibi—the Eight-Tails—refused to manifest in his presence. The Jinchuriki claimed the Beast was terrified of being 'tamed'."
Orochimaru turned slowly. His snake-like eyes narrowed.
"Tamed?" Orochimaru licked his lips. "A Tailed Beast... afraid? Does this man possess the Sharingan? The Wood Release?"
"Neither," Kabuto said. "That is the most intriguing part. All sources confirm he possesses zero active chakra. His pathways are dormant. He is biologically a normal human."
"Impossible," Orochimaru whispered. A hunger awoke in his eyes. "A normal human cannot terrify a mass of living chakra. There must be a secret. A genetic mutation? A new form of energy?"
"He calls it 'Haki'," Kabuto supplied.
"Haki..." Orochimaru tasted the word. "Willpower? How quaint. And yet... if a body can become that powerful without the burden of chakra exhaustion..."
Orochimaru looked at his own pale, bandaged hands. He sought immortality. He sought the ultimate vessel. A body that didn't decay, a body that could hold infinite power.
"Find him," Orochimaru ordered. "I want a tissue sample. Blood, hair, skin. I don't care. If he truly has no chakra, yet rivals a Kage... I must know how he works. He could be the key to the perfection I seek."
"He is currently sailing toward the smaller islands," Kabuto noted. "Near the Land of Whirlpools."
"Send the Sound Four if you must. Or perhaps... I shall pay him a visit myself after I am done with Konoha."
Somewhere Unknown: The Akatsuki Hideout
It was a dark, damp cavern. In the center stood the massive, grotesque statue of the Gedo Mazo.
Standing on the statue's outstretched fingers were flickering, colorful holograms of the Akatsuki members.
"We are gathered," the deep, authoritative voice of Pain echoed. "Because there has been a disruption in the balance."
"Is this about the loud-mouth in the cloud village?" a grating voice asked. Hidan, wielding his scythe in the hologram. "I heard the Eight-Tails got scared of a ghost. Pathetic."
"It is not pathetic," a calm, deep voice rumbled. Itachi Uchiha stood silently, his red eyes visible even in the projection. "It is concerning."
"Kisame," Pain directed. "You are from the Mist. You knew Zabuza."
"Heh," Kisame Hoshigaki grinned, his shark teeth glinting. "Zabuza was a vicious little brat. Not strong enough for the Seven Swordsmen, really. But he had pride. For him to call another man 'Captain'... that's not like him."
Kisame shifted his massive sword, Samehada, on his shoulder.
"But the rumors, boss... they say this Shanks guy cut the ocean. A flying slash. Pure wind."
"Wind Release?" Sasori asked from within his puppet shell.
"No," Kisame said. "Sword skill. It sounds like the old samurai legends. To cut the water so clean it doesn't rush back in immediately... that takes force that breaks physics."
"Zetsu," Pain called.
The plant-like creature emerged from the floor.
"We watched him in the Land of Lightning," Black Zetsu rasped. "He has no chakra."
"But his soul..." White Zetsu chirped. "His soul is huge! It's bright red and scary! It tastes like spicy peppers!"
"The Eight-Tails sensed a superior predator," Black Zetsu continued. "This 'Shanks' projects a field of dominance. It is likely a form of spiritual pressure similar to Genjutsu, but physical in nature."
Pain narrowed his Rinnegan eyes.
"Our goal is the capture of the Tailed Beasts," Pain stated. "To bring peace through pain. If this man can intimidate the Beasts into submission... he is a threat."
"Or an asset," Konan suggested softly.
"No," Pain said. "A man who sails under a pirate flag answers to no god. He answers to no village. He is chaos."
"I'll kill him," Deidara offered, flexing his hand-mouths. "I bet he can't tank a C3 explosion! Art is an explosion, un!"
"Do not engage yet," Pain ordered. "He is a variable we do not understand. He is currently moving away from the major villages. Let him drift. If he interferes with our hunt for the Three-Tails or the Six-Tails... then the Akatsuki will descend upon him."
"Understood," the members chorused.
But Itachi remained silent. He was thinking about the report from Konoha. About how this man had spared Kakashi. About how he had mentored Sasuke.
A man with no chakra who teaches strength of the heart, Itachi thought. Sasuke... did you find a better teacher than I expected?
The Red Potato
"ACHOO!"
I sneezed so hard I nearly fell out of my deck chair.
"Bless you, Captain!" Dr. Bushy Brow shouted from the railing, where he was currently trying to teach a seagull how to do sit-ups.
"Someone is talking about me," I sniffled, rubbing my nose. "Probably saying how handsome I am."
Zabuza was at the helm, steering us through calmer waters. The sky here was blue, the sea a turquoise crystal.
"More likely they are discussing the bounty that will inevitably be placed on your head," Zabuza said. "You humiliated the Raikage's brother. You stole a ship. You beat up Hunter-nin."
"I'm building a reputation!" I grabbed a bottle of sake. "A pirate needs a bounty! It's a badge of honor!"
"Captain," Zabuza pointed ahead. "Island approaching. It looks deserted. Ruins."
I looked. It was a large island, overgrown with vegetation. Ancient stone structures poked through the canopy. Whirlpool symbols were carved into the crumbling cliffs.
"Uzushio," Zabuza recognized it. "The ruins of the Land of Whirlpools. Destroyed in the Second War."
"Perfect!" I grinned. "Ruins mean treasure! And maybe ghosts! Let's dock!"
"Why are you obsessed with ghosts?" Zabuza sighed.
"Because," I stood up, Gryphon glinting in the sun. "I have a feeling this place has a story. And I love a good story."
As we sailed toward the ruins of the Uzumaki clan's home, I didn't know that the entire world was holding its breath, waiting for my next move.
I just wanted to see if there were any coconuts.
But deep down, my Haki was humming. This island... it felt familiar. It felt like home in a way I couldn't explain.
"Doc! Zabuza! Beach party!"
"AYE AYE!"
"I hate you both."
The Red Potato made landfall, and the legend of the Red-Haired Pirate continued to grow, one accidental catastrophe at a time.