I don't know. I'm scared, hungry, hurting. All those feelings… I'm so sick of them. How long have I been here? The sky still looks gray. Not even a day has passed, yet what I'm feeling seems to last an eternity.
Reincarnation, or what people call isekai—I used to wish for that. But that was then. Now I had a comfortable life, a steady job. For me, that was enough. I didn't work for some shady company. I had a reasonably harmonious family. I didn't have a partner, but my younger sibling was married, and that was enough for me. I worked constantly, but I still had time to read my favorite comics and novels.
I wasn't someone to be pitied. Not a shut-in NEET. Not an unemployed moocher. I had a steady job. A harmonious family. My sibling was married—that was enough, all of that was enough! So why... WHY AM I HERE?!
I opened my wallet. No money inside, just a few cards and a photo. The photo was of me, my sibling, and their family. My life felt complete seeing my sibling happy in that picture. Maybe I'll die here. But what did I do to deserve this?
The world was a mess. I kept staring at that photo, over and over. Only rain kept pouring on this place. I didn't understand anymore. A terrifying scene. Suddenly, a sound came from the bushes. Muffled by the rain, but I could still hear it faintly.
Is that a person? No way a rescue team could reach another world, right? I kept thinking about it, my gaze fixed on those bushes.
Green skin the color of leaves. A small body with pointy ears, carrying a spear longer than itself. A creature both strange and disgusting.
But seeing that creature, I realized I truly was in another world. Part of me still believed this was just a prank or a dream. But this was reality. A bitter reality.
"Dammit… is that a goblin?" I muttered.
The goblin seemed to be searching for something. Whatever it was looking for, this was my golden chance to run.
I tried to move my legs, but why were they so heavy? So weak. I realized why when I looked down at my feet. I was trembling. My hands were trembling. My whole body was trembling. I was terrified. But what could I do? I had to get out of here.
"Helloooooo, Humaannn, Come ouuuut…"
Wait, what? I heard a terrifying voice in my ears. I flinched. My foot accidentally stepped on a twig. Did they hear me? They shouldn't have because of the rain, right? But that was a stupid thought.
The goblin immediately rushed toward me. Its face was utterly disgusting, with drool dripping. Being chased by a mad dog would be better than this.
"DAMN IT, DAMN IT! GET AWAY! GET AWAY FROM ME!"
I wanted to move, but my body couldn't. It just froze in fear. Without realizing, a stain of blood was spreading on my stomach.
I'd never been stabbed by a spear. I'd never felt pain like this in my entire life. The blood kept flowing, dripping, wouldn't stop.
Scared. Hurt. Confused. My mind was filled with those words. My whole body was frozen. What was happening? Was I going to die?
I tried to punch the goblin's head. The sensation was like hitting a baby's soft head, but its skin felt rough. I hit it several times, but the goblin kept holding onto its spear until the end.
Let go, let go, let go, dammit, LET GO! I could only wish for one thing: to break free from this stupid creature. Punch after punch, my hands started to show stains. Was it my blood or the goblin's? I didn't know. I just kept swinging my arm.
A cracking sound was heard. I didn't stop; in fact, this was a sign my attack was working. I delivered my final punch. Its head cracked open. Its soft skull was visible. I could even see parts of its brain. The goblin then went limp and collapsed. Was it dead? Maybe.
Even though the goblin was dead, the pain wasn't over. Its spear was still stuck in my body. Was it deep or shallow? I didn't know, but it hurt terribly. I tried to grip the spear. My hands were shaking. Tears streamed down my face.
'It hurts… this hurts so much.'
I wanted to scream, but I couldn't. I was afraid other goblins would hear. I tried to pull the spear out a little, but a sharp pain shot through my body. Hurt, hurt hurt hurt—the word kept repeating. I almost collapsed. Dizzy. My hands had no strength left. My legs started shaking violently. But I kept trying to pull this damn spear out of my body.
I took a deep breath, hoping one strong pull would free it. I gritted my teeth and pulled with all my might. The result wasn't what I hoped for. The spear only shifted out a little. Not worth the pain I got.
'Fuck, fuck, fuck, oh God, help me.'
I didn't care anymore. I just yanked it out with all my strength—a reckless pull. Maybe a nerve was damaged or a blood vessel torn, I didn't know. Little by little, the spear managed to shift out. The pain radiating through my whole body made me breathless, but I kept trying and trying. Blood kept dripping. My face started turning pale. Finally, the spear came free. The wound wasn't too deep, but blood kept flowing out.
I felt a slight sense of relief, but instantly my stomach felt strange. My head spun. The contents of my stomach wanted to come out. What was wrong? Why did I feel like this?
But then I realized. Seeing my blood-soaked body, my blood-smeared hands, and the corpse of a goblin right before my eyes… This was insane. I was going insane. This body had reached its limit. I was probably going to die.
'HUECKKK, ughhhh ughmmm, hueck, uhuk-uhuk, HUUECK,'
Everything in my stomach came out. My stomach went wild. My body was past its limit. I could never go back to who I was before.
Stop, please stop. My stomach kept churning. I wanted to vomit, but there was nothing left inside. This pain was slowly consuming me.
"Girrrkkk"
Hearing that sound, I immediately turned around. My eyes trembled. I saw goblins again. Not just one, but a group of them. I tried to count them, but my mind was blank. I froze.
I gripped that ugly spear tightly. My only lifeline was that spear. My previous luck was gone. This time, I would really die.
Where could I run? I didn't know this place. This was another world, completely different from mine. Move, move, please move! My legs froze in fear. My body had betrayed me.
"Do you want to survive?"
Of course I do. Please, save me.
"Then follow me. Obey me. Never do anything stupid."
"Run. Run opposite the goblins. Shortly after, you'll find a cave."
"Go inside."
I didn't care where that voice came from anymore. All I had to do was move and keep moving. My body was numb, still frozen. I was still terrified, but I had to manage. I must. My leg moved. My body started moving again. A hope. No matter how small. I would keep living.
Bushes, trees—I didn't pay attention to anything. I didn't look back even once. But I knew. The goblins were still after me. My body had been past its limit from the start. Hurt, hurt, hurt—the pain kept piling up until I went numb. My eyes watered. My face was pale. But I forced myself to run. No. I had to run.
My legs began to weaken. The adrenaline I felt was starting to fade. I felt my body betraying me again. Just a few more steps. Only a few more steps. How many times had I thought that? Yet this forest seemed endless. Was I tricked? Or had I been insane since I got here?
"Huh? What?" My foot felt like it was floating. I couldn't feel the ground anymore. I had stepped off a cliff.
I tumbled violently, occasionally hitting sharp gravel or rocks. My body felt like it was being punctured. I tried to stay conscious, but this pain kept torturing me. My head felt squeezed. Several rocks hit my head. My vision immediately blurred.
My body was shattered. Broken. Hopeless. I don't want to die, I don't want to die, I don't want to die, I don't want to die, I don't want to die. Oh God, I beg you. I don't want to die. Even through the blur, I could see it. A cave. I started crawling. Every movement was painful. Every movement, my consciousness almost faded. Every movement brought me closer to death. I didn't know what was in that cave. But I didn't want to die. Not like this. My spear, for some reason, was still in my grip. My hand seemed to have lost all feeling.
"Keep trying, human… you're almost there."
That voice appeared again. That voice of encouragement gave me strength. The cave was close, but my body felt far away. Thunder roared loudly, heralding the coming storm. The ground grew soft. My wounds started getting covered in mud. I didn't care about infection anymore. I just kept moving forward.
A little more.
Just a little more.
I made it… finally… I made it…
"Girkkk"
What… a goblin? In front of me? Damn it, damn it, damn youuu! After all I went through, just to meet a goblin again? Don't joke with me. Don't you dare joke, you bastard.
The goblin carried a stone knife. The blade was serrated but blunt. A stab from that thing would only bring immense suffering to its victim.
I stared at the stone knife. My brain froze. The goblin approached with sidling steps, its narrow yellow eyes full of greed. Thick drool dripped from its pockmarked mouth. It was only two, three steps away.
No. Not again. Please.
My legs trembled like dry leaves, but not from pain—this was deeper. This was total betrayal by the body I'd carried all my life. My brain screamed to run, but my muscles just hardened like stone. The hole in my stomach throbbed. Warm blood flowed freely, mixing with mud. I could feel the ache radiating to my ribs, stabbing at my lungs. Death was very close.
"Truly pitiful, human. I never thought I'd find such a useless human." The voice returned.
"Do you want to live, human?" The voice echoed again, louder.
Yes, please, I want to live. I don't want to feel this pain anymore.
"This is the first and the last time. If the fate of your death stands before you once more, then your death will be absolute. Remember this, human. You have made a mistaken decision." This voice was more forceful. More suffocating. But this time, not in my ears, but directly in my skull. Like cold claws gripping my insides.
The goblin leaped, the stone knife raised high. Its movement was clumsy but fast, its foul stench piercing. My survival instinct finally screamed louder than my fear.
The world suddenly slowed. The rain fell like crystals. The goblin's short, greedy breath. The tension in its calf before the jump. Even the small crack in its stone knife—my eyes saw it all clearly.
The spear. The first goblin's spear was still nearby.
My body moved before my thoughts finished. The pain vanished completely. Instinct took over. Adrenaline flooded my body. I snatched the blood-smeared spear with my still-functional left hand. Heavy. Too heavy for this condition. But I forced my muscles to tense.
The sound of tearing flesh rang out clearly.
The spear rammed into the goblin's stomach just as it was in mid-air. Not a clean stab. The tip was blunt, ripping in like a rough wooden club. The goblin screamed,
arching its small body. Its eyes bulged with disbelief. Thick, dark red blood spurted onto my face—salty and rotten.
But it wasn't dead. It was still moving. Even with its body impaled, it kept coming. With only my left hand, I couldn't hold it back.
With a wild groan, it swung its blunt stone knife and plunged it into my thigh.
ARGHHH
The pain was different. Dull. Sawing through flesh. Not the clean stab of the spear earlier. This was torture. The knife was serrated, catching on muscle, tearing as it tried to pull it out. My tears streamed down hot, mixing with blood and rain. I dropped the spear. I forced my right hand to clutch the goblin's wrinkled neck. Its skin was cold and scaly, like a snake's.
"Die. Die, damn you!"
I tightened my grip, twisting its wrist until the bone cracked.
The sound was both satisfying and disgusting. The goblin shrieked. The stone knife fell. But it bit. Its yellow teeth sank into my right arm, piercing down to a blood vessel.
My blood spurted. Panic. The adrenaline began to fade. The world spun.
"Kill it." The voice roared in my head, forcing me to move.
Using both hands, I gathered my last strength and strangled the goblin. The pain I felt in both hands, I had to endure it. Had to. The goblin still writhed. Its eyes were full of hatred. The sound of its screams gave me a sensation I couldn't imagine.
Die die die die—the word repeated endlessly. The pain building in my body almost made me faint, but I had to stay conscious. My hands kept strangling. Its hands stopped writhing. Its eyes went empty. That disgusting sound stopped. The goblin was dead.
My mind felt empty. My vision began to fade. The pain I felt throughout my body suddenly vanished, but I felt weak. So very weak. My body was beyond saving. The pain had surpassed what I could feel. I was going to die.
"Go deeper, human."
My body felt hypnotized. I had no chance of survival anymore. My only chance was to follow this voice. Whether it was a demon or not,
I didn't care anymore. I was going to die. I would die soon. That was all I could think.
Step by step, I went deeper. My legs were weak. My eyes could only see shapes roughly. My vision was fading. Torches lit up inside the cave—the only illumination in this place. What was this place? I didn't know. I just kept walking and walking. Until finally, my legs could no longer move. I lay helpless.
Faintly, I saw a corpse in the distance. For some reason, I crawled closer. Instinct had taken over. I moved based on a sliver of hope. I didn't even know what I was hoping for. But I kept crawling, even though I didn't know what I would find.
I touched the corpse. The sensation of rotting skin and sticky substances clinging to it. I kept groping, hoping for something. The sensation in my hands was diminishing. I could barely feel anything through them. I kept feeling around. All I found was a blood-red bottle.
I didn't know what it was, but its color was so attention-grabbing. My dry, bloody mouth even salivated. This thing was dangerous. But my body craved it. Without another thought, I drank the liquid. First gulp: a sweet-sour burn on my tongue. Second: wild euphoria. Third—
UHUK!
My guts were hammered by an invisible mallet. Bones were crushed. Nerves were shredded. I sobbed... but my body was silent. Numb. Dying.
...I still wanted to live. I want to live...
"Ughhh..."
My body felt torn apart. My insides felt stabbed repeatedly. My head kept spinning. My eyes could no longer see. I had no sensation in my body. I was numb. Was I dying here? In this place?
I still want to live. I want to live…