Ren discovered a third universal truth the next morning.
Morning drills in cultivation sects existed solely to remind weak disciples that gravity was optional—for everyone except them.
He stood in line with the outer disciples, hands clasped behind his back, watching people punch stone pillars like they'd personally insulted their ancestors.
Ren yawned.
> System Notification:
Host displays insufficient reverence for cultivation environment.
"Sorry," Ren murmured internally. "I come from a world where enlightenment comes from coffee and existential dread."
A nearby disciple shot him a look.
Ren smiled politely. The look intensified. Apparently, smiling was provocative now.
Amazing, Ren thought. I'm committing social crimes just by existing.
Elder Zhou—ancient, stern, and radiating the kind of authority that said I've buried more geniuses than you've met people—paced before the disciples.
"Cultivation is discipline," the elder intoned. "Those without resolve will be cast aside."
Ren nodded solemnly. "Ah yes. No pressure at all."
> System Reminder:
Upcoming evaluation in three days.
Recommended Action: Demonstrate measurable improvement.
Ren winced. "Define 'measurable.' Preferably with a very generous ruler."
The drills began.
Ren copied the stances as best he could. His body complained immediately—apparently Lin Fan's muscles had never signed up for this subscription.
Five minutes in, he was sweating.
Ten minutes in, he was questioning every decision he'd ever made.
Fifteen minutes in, Zhao Kun glanced over with a smug grin.
Ren caught the look and grinned back.
"Careful," Ren said pleasantly. "If you stare any harder, people might misunderstand your feelings."
Zhao Kun almost choked.
> System Update:
Host provoked opponent without triggering violence.
Psychological Advantage: Minor increase.
Ren straightened slightly. I'm weaponizing awkwardness now. Fantastic.
During a brief break, Ren collapsed onto a stone bench. His lungs burned. His dignity had filed a formal complaint.
Then a shadow fell over him.
Chen Yue.
She crossed her arms. "You're still alive."
Ren looked up, smiling faintly. "I know. I keep disappointing people."
Her gaze flicked over him—sweaty, tired, but still standing. "You didn't quit."
"Believe me," Ren said, "I thought about it. Briefly. Then I remembered I'm allergic to poverty."
She snorted before she could stop herself.
> System Update:
Target: Chen Yue
Favorability: –6% → –3%
Ren blinked. Wow. Sarcasm really is my primary cultivation method.
"Don't misunderstand," Chen Yue said quickly. "If you fail, I still report you."
"Of course," Ren replied. "Wouldn't want to break tradition."
She paused, then added, "But… keep this up."
And walked away.
Ren leaned back, staring at the sky. "I'm being encouraged by my creditors now. I've officially hit rock bottom."
> System Notification:
Body Tempering Progress: 3% → 6%
Reason: Sustained physical effort.
Ren perked up. "Wait, really? I suffer a little and numbers go up?"
> Affirmative.
Ren nodded thoughtfully. "So pain is progress. This explains a lot about my past life."
As the drills resumed, Ren moved with a bit more confidence—not stronger, not faster, but sharper. More aware.
Across the courtyard, Su Meilin glanced his way briefly.
> System Update:
Target: Su Meilin
Favorability: 17% → 18%
Reason: Persistence despite weakness.
Ren noticed and sighed. "Eighteen percent. At this rate, we'll reach mutual respect right around Immortal Ascension."
> System Advisory:
Host sarcasm frequency increasing.
Ren smirked. "What can I say? If I'm going to claw my way to the top through humiliation, I might as well enjoy the climb."
The sun rose higher over the Azure Blossom Sect.
Lin Fan—the joke, the wastrel, the walking warning tale—was still weak.
Still mocked.
Still underestimated.
But now?
Now he was improving.
And worst of all—for everyone else—he was doing it with a smile and a mouth that refused to shut up.