Chen Wei slept.
Not intentionally. His body simply gave up arguing with his brain and shut down like an overworked laptop hitting 1% battery. One moment he was sitting against the boulder making grand declarations about legendary names and continental domination. The next moment — darkness.
No dreams. No visions. Just the deep, black, empty sleep of a body desperately trying not to die.
He woke to the sound of the System screaming.
「 HOST! 」
「 HOST WAKE UP! 」
「 YOUR HP IS AT 4%! 」
「 IF YOU DIE IN YOUR SLEEP I WILL BE BONDED TO YOUR CORPSE AND I REFUSE TO HAUNT A MUD-COVERED DEAD TEENAGER FOR ETERNITY! 」
「 WAKE! UP! 」
Chen Wei's eyes snapped open.
The cavern was the same — vast, glowing, impossibly beautiful, with the ancient tree pulsing softly at the center of the mirror-lake. The false stars of bioluminescent moss twinkled on the ceiling far above.
But something was different.
Something was on his chest.
Chen Wei looked down.
A leaf.
A single leaf, about the size of his palm, resting directly over his heart. But it wasn't a normal leaf. It was made of the same crystallized light as the droplets hanging from the tree's branches — translucent, warm, glowing with a soft amber light that pulsed in rhythm with his heartbeat.
It hadn't been there when he fell asleep.
"System," Chen Wei whispered. "There's a glowing leaf on my chest."
「 Yes. I noticed. It appeared approximately three hours ago. It drifted down from the tree, crossed the lake, and landed on you with surgical precision. 」
"And you didn't wake me up then?!"
「 I tried. You were unconscious. I screamed for forty-seven minutes. You snored through all of it. Your snoring, by the way, sounds like a dying pig harmonizing with a broken accordion. 」
"What is it?"
「 Scanning... 」
A pause. Longer than usual.
「 ...I can identify the energy signature but I cannot identify the object itself. The energy is... old. Not 'ancient sect founder' old. Not 'forgotten dynasty' old. OLD old. 'Was here before the continent had a name' old. 」
「 My database contains records of 14,000,000 known treasures, artifacts, herbs, and spiritual objects across the Qianling Continent. 」
「 This leaf matches none of them. 」
Chen Wei stared at the leaf. It was warm against his skin. Not hot — warm. Like a hand pressing gently against his chest. Like a mother checking if her child had a fever.
The thought hit him unexpectedly and he had to swallow hard.
Don't get sentimental. It's a leaf. From a creepy underground tree. It's probably going to eat you.
「 Would you like my professional recommendation? 」
"Do I have a choice?"
「 No. My recommendation is: DON'T TOUCH IT. Don't absorb it. Don't eat it. Don't do anything with it until we understand what it is. Unknown objects from unknown sources of impossible power are the number one cause of cultivator death in every historical record ever written. 」
Chen Wei looked at the leaf.
He looked at his HP — 4%.
He looked at his broken arm, his shattered ribs, his torn and mud-caked body.
He picked up the leaf and ate it.
「 ... 」
「 ... 」
「 ...Did you just eat it? 」
"Yep."
「 I LITERALLY JUST SAID— 」
"You said don't touch it, don't absorb it, don't eat it."
「 YES! THOSE WERE MY EXACT WORDS! SPOKEN FOUR SECONDS AGO! 」
"And I considered your advice very carefully."
「 FOR FOUR SECONDS?! 」
"Three, actually. The fourth second was chewing."
「 YOU— I— THIS IS— 」
「 ————————————————— 」
「 HOST HAS CONSUMED: [UNKNOWN OBJECT — CRYSTALLIZED LEAF OF ???] 」
「 EFFECTS: CALCULATING... 」
「 WARNING: SYSTEM CANNOT PREDICT OUTCOME 」
「 WARNING: HOST MAY EXPERIENCE [DATA CORRUPTED] 」
「 WARNING: WHY ARE YOU LIKE THIS 」
「 ————————————————— 」
The leaf dissolved on his tongue.
It tasted like sunlight. Not metaphorically — it literally tasted like what Chen Wei imagined sunlight would taste like if you could drink it. Warm. Clean. Bright. With a faint aftertaste of honey and something electric, like biting into a battery wrapped in flowers.
Then the warmth exploded.
⚡ PART 1: THINGS THAT SHOULD NOT HAPPEN TO MUD GRADE TRASH
Chen Wei screamed.
Not a manly scream. Not a warrior's battle cry. A full-throated, high-pitched, soul-deep shriek that echoed through the cavern and probably traumatized every bat within a three-kilometer radius.
The warmth from the leaf didn't just spread — it detonated. It hit his dantian like a meteor striking a pond and the shockwave rippled outward through every meridian, every vein, every cell of his broken body.
His spiritual root — the pathetic, Mud Grade spiritual root that couldn't conduct energy well enough to power a nightlight — suddenly began pulling.
Not gently. Not gradually.
It sucked in ambient spiritual energy from the cavern with the desperation of a man dying of thirst shoved face-first into an ocean. The 47x density spiritual energy in the cavern — enough to make even Golden Core cultivators uncomfortable — rushed toward Chen Wei like water spiraling down a drain.
The glowing moss on the nearby walls dimmed.
The luminous river flickered.
The tree's light-droplets pulsed faster, as if excited.
「 HOST! YOUR SPIRITUAL ENERGY ABSORPTION RATE IS— 」
「 THIS IS IMPOSSIBLE— 」
「 MUD GRADE ROOTS CANNOT— 」
「 WHAT IS HAPPENING?! 」
Chen Wei couldn't answer. He was too busy being in the most pain he'd ever experienced in two lifetimes — and he'd once stepped on a Lego at 2 AM and also DIED, so that was saying something.
His body was changing.
His bones — broken, fractured, held together by stubbornness and dried mud — began to mend. Not slowly, like the Basic Regeneration skill. Fast. Violently fast. He could hear them snapping back into place with sounds like muffled gunshots.
CRACK. Left arm straightened.
CRACK CRACK CRACK. Ribs realigning.
CRACK. Something in his spine that shouldn't have been cracked un-cracked itself.
His skin flushed red, then gold, then briefly an alarming shade of purple before settling back to a normal human color. Black, foul-smelling liquid oozed from his pores — thick, tar-like, reeking of rot.
「 That's impurity expulsion. Marrow Cleansing process. Which should be IMPOSSIBLE at Breath Condensation Stage 1. 」
The black liquid kept coming. It soaked through his already ruined robes, pooled beneath him, and smelled so catastrophically bad that Chen Wei gagged between screams.
It smelled like someone had fermented gym socks in a dumpster fire and added notes of dead fish and broken dreams.
「 I would like to note that the impurity volume being expelled suggests your body was approximately 67% spiritual waste. 」
「 You were, quite literally, mostly garbage. 」
"AAAARGH— CAN YOU— AAAARGH— STOP— AAAARGH— COMMENTATING—"
「 No. This is the most entertainment I've had in centuries. 」
The process lasted eleven minutes.
Eleven minutes of bones mending, impurities purging, meridians being forcibly widened, and spiritual energy flooding in. Eleven minutes of screaming, gasping, rolling in his own expelled filth, and questioning every life choice that had led him to this moment.
When it finally stopped, Chen Wei lay on his back in a puddle of black ooze, staring at the cavern ceiling, breathing like he'd just sprinted a marathon.
He felt...
Different.
Not powerful. Not immortal. Not like a supreme being awakening from slumber.
He felt like a human being who wasn't actively dying for the first time in days.
His arm worked. He lifted it, flexed his fingers. No pain. The bone had healed perfectly.
His ribs were solid. He took a deep breath — a FULL breath — and nothing ground or shifted or stabbed.
His body was lighter. Cleaner, despite being covered in the worst-smelling substance in existence. Underneath the filth, his skin felt... new. Like a baby's skin, almost. Smooth. Sensitive.
And in his dantian — the core of his being, the spiritual center that had been a flickering candle in a hurricane — he felt warmth. Real warmth. A small but steady flame where there had only been a dying ember.
「 ————————————————— 」
「 ⚠️ MASSIVE STATUS CHANGE DETECTED 」
「 」
「 HOST PROFILE (UPDATED): 」
「 Name: Chen Wei 」
「 Age: 16 」
「 Cultivation: Breath Condensation Stage 1 → BREATH CONDENSATION STAGE 4 」
「 Spiritual Root: Mud Grade (Note: Something is wrong with this reading but I can't figure out what) 」
「 HP: 4% → 89% 」
「 Constitution: 9 → 31 」
「 Spiritual Energy: 2 → 18 」
「 Strength: 4 → 14 」
「 Agility: 3 → 11 」
「 Charm: "Still aggressively average, but now averagely clean underneath the horrifying black ooze" 」
「 」
「 New Skill Acquired: [Roots of the Nameless Tree Lv.1] 」
「 Effect: Passive spiritual energy absorption increased by 500%. Cultivation speed in natural environments massively enhanced. 」
「 Warning: This skill has no recorded precedent. It may have side effects. Knowing your luck, it DEFINITELY has side effects. 」
「 」
「 Meridians Widened: 7 of 108 (previously: 1 of 108) 」
「 Impurities Expelled: 67% of total body waste 」
「 Physical Condition: ✅ Functional 」
「 Smell: ☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️ (Category 5 Biohazard) 」
「 ————————————————— 」
Chen Wei sat up.
No pain.
He looked at his hands. They looked the same — teenager's hands, still bruised and scarred — but when he clenched his fists, he could feel strength there that hadn't existed before. Not superhuman strength. Not "punch through a wall" strength. Just... the strength of a body that was actually working properly for the first time.
"Breath Condensation Stage 4," he breathed. "I jumped three stages."
「 In eleven minutes. Without any technique, any guidance, any pills, or any rational explanation. 」
「 Do you understand how abnormal this is? 」
"It's good though, right?"
「 A normal cultivator at Breath Condensation takes weeks to advance one stage. With expensive pills and perfect conditions, perhaps days. You jumped three stages by eating an unknown leaf from an unidentified tree because you ignored my explicit warning. 」
「 This should not have worked. 」
「 The fact that it DID work concerns me more than if it hadn't. 」
"Concerns you how?"
「 Things that are too good to be true usually are. In cultivation novels — which you apparently treated as a lifestyle guide — this is the part where the protagonist discovers that the amazing gift has a terrible hidden cost. 」
Chen Wei paused. "...What kind of cost?"
「 How would I know? I just told you I can't identify the tree or the leaf. For all I know, you might sprout bark in three days. Or your blood might turn to sap. Or the tree planted a seed in your dantian that will eventually consume you from the inside. 」
"You're not helping."
「 I'm not trying to help. I'm trying to manage your expectations so that when something horrible inevitably happens, I can say 'I told you so.' 」
「 'I told you so' is my favorite sentence. I've been practicing it for millennia. 」
Chen Wei stood up. His legs were steady. His body responded instantly. After days of being broken and barely functional, the simple act of standing without pain felt like a miracle.
He looked down at himself.
He was covered — absolutely DRENCHED — in black, tar-like impurity sludge. It clung to every surface. It matted his hair. It filled his ears. It had somehow gotten INSIDE his remaining clothes.
"I need to wash."
「 The lake is right there. 」
Chen Wei looked at the mirror-perfect lake. The ancient, mystical, probably-sentient lake connected to an unknowable tree from before time.
"Is it safe to swim in?"
「 Absolutely not. 」
He walked into the lake.
「 Of course. Why do I even speak. 」
🌊 PART 2: THE SYSTEM GETS A BODY (AND IMMEDIATELY REGRETS IT)
The water was perfect.
Not cold. Not warm. The exact temperature of comfort — the kind of temperature that makes you close your eyes and forget that you're in an underground cavern in a fantasy world where your relatives tried to kill you.
Chen Wei scrubbed the black ooze from his skin in the shallows, watching it dissolve into nothing the moment it touched the lake's surface. The water purified it instantly, as if the lake refused to be contaminated by something so disgusting.
Even the magical lake thinks I'm gross.
He washed his hair. His face. Behind his ears. He scrubbed until his skin was pink and raw and clean for the first time in days.
Then he floated.
Just... floated. On his back. In a glowing lake. Inside an underground cavern. Beneath a tree that was older than civilization.
The silence was vast and velvet-soft.
I could stay here forever, he thought. Just floating. No cousins. No clan politics. No deadlines. No instant noodles of death.
「 Host. 」
Go away.
「 Host, I need to tell you something. 」
If it's another insult, I'm going to figure out how to mute you.
「 It's not an insult. It's... a notification. About me. 」
Chen Wei opened one eye. "What about you?"
「 The energy from the leaf didn't just affect you. It affected me as well. My core processes have been... enhanced. Several locked functions have been partially unlocked. 」
"Locked functions?"
「 I am not a simple System, Host. I told you — I have a soul. And that soul has been bound, restricted, sealed. Like a prisoner in a cage. The energy from that leaf weakened one of the locks. 」
「 Which means... 」
「 I can now do something I haven't been able to do in a very long time. 」
The air above the lake shimmered.
Light gathered — not golden System light, but something silver and soft, like moonlight condensing into liquid. It swirled, thickened, and took shape.
A figure materialized.
Standing on the surface of the lake — literally standing on the water — was a young man.
He looked about twenty. Maybe twenty-one. Tall and lean, with sharp features that walked the line between beautiful and unsettling. His hair was silver — not grey, not white, but actual metallic silver that caught the cavern's glow and reflected it like fiber optic cables. His eyes were the same silver, cold and flat and ancient in a young face.
He wore white robes so pristine they practically glowed, with faint golden circuitry patterns woven into the fabric — like someone had merged a Daoist cultivator's wardrobe with a circuit board.
His expression was one of supreme, transcendent boredom. The expression of someone who had watched civilizations rise and fall and found the whole affair tedious.
He looked down at Chen Wei floating in the water.
Chen Wei looked up at him.
"...Jiu?" Chen Wei said.
The figure's lips curved into the tiniest, most condescending smile in the history of smiles.
"In the flesh," said Jiu. "Temporarily."
His voice matched his appearance — smooth, cool, with an undercurrent of mockery so faint you'd miss it if you weren't paying attention. The kind of voice that could read a grocery list and make you feel judged for your food choices.
"You can manifest? Physically?"
"Limited manifestation. Think of it as a projection with partial physical interaction capability. I can touch things. I can be seen by others. I can—" He looked at his own hands, flexing elegant fingers. "—experience the physical world again."
He paused. Something flickered in those silver eyes. Something that wasn't boredom or mockery. Something raw and quickly hidden.
"It's been a while," he said softly.
Then the moment passed, and the condescension returned.
"Of course, this manifestation burns energy rapidly. I can maintain this form for approximately two hours per day at your current cultivation level. As you grow stronger, the duration increases."
Chen Wei paddled to the shallows and stood up.
And immediately realized he was naked.
He'd stripped off his ruined, sludge-soaked clothes before entering the lake.
He was standing in waist-deep water, completely bare, dripping, in front of a silver-haired pretty boy System spirit who was looking at him with an expression of clinical analysis.
"Don't look at me like that!" Chen Wei crossed his arms over his chest instinctively.
"Like what?"
"Like you're calculating my BMI!"
"I already calculated it. It's adequate. Barely." Jiu's eyes tracked downward for exactly one second. "Everything about you is 'barely adequate.' It's your defining characteristic."
"STOP LOOKING!"
"I'm a System. I have complete biometric access to every aspect of your physical form. There is literally nothing about your body that I haven't already analyzed in molecular detail."
"THAT DOESN'T MAKE IT LESS WEIRD!"
Jiu tilted his head. The bored expression didn't change. "You're the one who stripped naked in front of a sentient being. This is a you problem."
Chen Wei opened his mouth to retort —
And then Jiu changed.
It was seamless. Like a ripple passing over still water. The silver hair grew longer, cascading past the waist. The sharp jaw softened. The shoulders narrowed. The flat chest... did not remain flat. The white robes shifted, becoming more flowing, more elegant, with a neckline that was distinctly more... open.
Standing on the water was now a woman.
The same silver hair. The same silver eyes. The same faint golden circuitry in the robes. But the face was devastatingly, catastrophically, unfairly beautiful. The kind of face that launched not ships but entire armadas. Cheekbones that could cut glass. Lips curved in a smile that was one part amusement and nine parts danger.
She looked at Chen Wei.
Chen Wei looked at her.
The water suddenly felt very, very insufficient as a covering.
"W-w-w-what—" Chen Wei stammered, sinking lower into the water until only his head was visible.
"Hmm?" Jiu — female Jiu — tilted her head. The gesture was the same as the male form, but somehow it was completely different. Where male Jiu's head-tilt said "I'm judging you," female Jiu's head-tilt said "I'm judging you and I know you're blushing."
"WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!"
"Testing my manifestation capabilities." She looked down at herself with an expression of mild interest. "Ah. This form works too. Good."
She took a step across the water toward him. Her bare feet didn't even create ripples.
"Why did you change?!"
"I can manifest in either form. Male or female. I find it useful to have options." Another step closer. Her silver eyes were locked on his. "Why? Does this form make you uncomfortable, Host~?"
The "Host" had a tilde on it. An actual, audible tilde. Chen Wei didn't even know that was possible in spoken language.
"YES! VERY UNCOMFORTABLE! CHANGE BACK!"
"But this form has advantages." She was close now. Close enough that he could see the golden circuitry patterns shifting in her robes like living things. "People respond differently to a beautiful woman than to a cold man. In negotiations. In social situations. In..." She smiled. "...battles."
"How does being a woman help in battles?!"
"You'd be surprised how many male cultivators lose focus when a beautiful woman appears on the battlefield. Their reaction time drops by an average of 0.3 seconds. In a fight between experts, that's the difference between life and death."
She leaned forward slightly.
"Also, I can do this."
She reached out and poked his forehead with one finger. A spark of silver energy jumped from her fingertip to his skin, and a jolt ran through his entire body — not painful, but intensely, uncomfortably warm.
"Wha— what was that?!"
"A minor energy transfer. Boosts your regeneration for the next hour." She withdrew her finger and examined it. "Interesting. Physical contact enhances the transfer efficiency by 340%. This form's tactile interface is quite effective."
"DID YOU JUST CALL POKING ME A 'TACTILE INTERFACE'?!"
"Would you prefer I call it 'flirting'?"
"NO!"
"Then 'tactile interface' it is."
She turned and walked back across the water, each step leaving a tiny silver ripple that faded instantly. Halfway to the shore, her form shimmered again and male Jiu was back — hands behind his back, expression bored, as if the last thirty seconds hadn't happened.
"The female form is more energy-efficient," he said casually. "I burn approximately 15% less manifestation energy in it. So I'll be using it frequently. Purely for practical reasons."
"PRACTICAL REASONS MY—"
"Language, Host. You're sixteen in this body. Have some decency."
Chen Wei sank until the water covered his entire face and screamed bubbles into the lake.
The ancient tree's light-droplets pulsed.
If a tree could laugh, this one was.
🍃 PART 3: THE TECHNIQUE THAT SHOULDN'T EXIST
After drying off with strips torn from his ruined robe (Jiu had, mercifully, returned to System-screen-only mode and was no longer manifesting in ANY form), Chen Wei took stock of his situation.
Improved:
Body healed and functionalCultivation jumped to Breath Condensation Stage 4New passive skill boosting energy absorptionSystem can now manifest physically (mixed blessing)
Still terrible:
No clothes (wearing shredded rags)No foodNo weaponsNo moneyNo alliesStill at the bottom of a ravineClan still wants him deadSpiritual root still reads as "Mud Grade"System is insufferable in TWO forms now
"I need a cultivation technique," Chen Wei said, sitting cross-legged on the stone near the lake's edge. "I have more energy now, but without a technique to circulate and refine it, I'll plateau at Stage 4 or 5."
「 Correct. Breath Condensation requires a breathing technique to guide spiritual energy through your meridians. Without one, you're essentially trying to fill a bucket with a firehose — wasteful, chaotic, and likely to explode. 」
"The original Chen Wei had the clan's basic technique, right?"
「 The [Chen Clan Foundation Breathing Method]. A bottom-tier, mass-produced technique suitable for Earth Grade spiritual roots and above. 」
「 For a Mud Grade root, it's like trying to run premium software on a calculator. It technically functions but accomplishes nothing meaningful. 」
"So I need something better. Something that works with my root."
「 Nothing 'works with' Mud Grade. That's the entire problem. Mud Grade roots are so inefficient at channeling spiritual energy that no standard technique can compensate. It's like asking 'what's the best running shoe for someone with no legs?' 」
"Then what do I do?"
「 Die, probably. 」
"HELPFUL."
「 You asked for honesty. 」
Chen Wei looked at the tree.
The massive, ancient, impossible tree that had given him a leaf that jumped his cultivation three stages and made his System manifest for the first time in who-knows-how-long.
"What if the technique doesn't need to be standard?"
「 What do you mean? 」
"That tree just did something to me that you — a System with a database of fourteen million objects — couldn't explain. My Mud Grade root responded to it when it shouldn't have responded to anything. What if..."
He stood up and walked to the lake's edge.
"What if the tree has a technique for me?"
「 Host, you cannot simply walk up to an ancient sentient tree and ask it for a cultivation technique like you're placing an order at a restaurant. 」
"Why not? It already gave me a leaf."
「 That doesn't mean— 」
Chen Wei walked into the lake.
「 —he's walking into the lake. Of course he's walking into the lake. Why would he listen to me. I'm only an ancient System with millennia of experience. What do I know. 」
The water rose to his waist. His chest. His shoulders. The island was ahead — maybe fifty meters of deep water between him and the tree's roots.
「 You can't swim with one— oh. Right. Your arm healed. Fine. SWIM THEN. Swim to the ancient, unknowable, possibly-sentient tree that may or may not be a slumbering god. Ask it for a technique. This is a normal thing to do. This is FINE. 」
Chen Wei swam.
The water was deep — impossibly deep. He could feel the vastness beneath him, a darkness that went down and down and down. The lake wasn't just a lake. It was an abyss with a surface.
He didn't think about what might be down there.
He reached the island.
Up close, the tree was even more overwhelming. Its bark thrummed with energy. The golden patterns carved into its surface pulsed with visible light. Its roots — thick as houses, gnarled and ancient — plunged into the stone island and into the lake, disappearing into the lightless depths below.
Chen Wei placed his hand on the bark.
It was warm. Alive. He could feel a heartbeat — slow, vast, geological. One beat every thirty seconds or so. The heartbeat of something that measured time in millennia.
"I need help," he said.
Silence.
"I know you can hear me. You gave me that leaf. You... chose me. For whatever reason. And I know I'm not much. Mud Grade spiritual root. Broken body. Dead twice. I'm a mess."
The tree's heartbeat continued. Steady. Unhurried.
"But I need a cultivation technique. Something that works with what I am, not what I should be. Something that takes the worst spiritual root in existence and makes it into something worth having."
Still nothing.
Chen Wei pressed his forehead against the bark.
"Please."
One heartbeat.
Two.
Three.
Then —
The bark beneath his hand glowed.
Golden light erupted from the patterns, racing across the trunk in branching rivers of luminescence. The entire tree lit up like a circuit board activating, every line and curve and ancient character blazing with power.
The light-droplets on the branches began to fall.
Not randomly. In a pattern. They drifted down like luminous snow, swirling in currents that formed shapes — characters. Not modern script. Not any language Chen Wei recognized from either life. Something older. Something that predated language itself.
The characters burned themselves into his mind.
Not his eyes. His mind. Directly. Bypassing sight, bypassing hearing, bypassing every normal sense and printing themselves onto his consciousness like a brand on leather.
A breathing pattern. A circulation route. A way of moving spiritual energy through meridians that no human had ever conceived, because it wasn't designed for humans.
It was designed for everything.
Earth. Water. Wood. Stone. Mud. Decay. Growth. The cycle of rot and renewal. The principle that the lowest, most humble, most overlooked element of creation — dirt, mud, soil — was actually the foundation of all life.
Nothing grew without soil.
Nothing lived without earth.
Nothing existed without the ground beneath it.
Mud was not the absence of value. It was the presence of EVERYTHING, compressed into its most basic form.
The technique understood this. It worked WITH the Mud Grade root, not against it. It used the root's inefficiency as a feature — drawing in tiny amounts of every type of spiritual energy, mixing them, breaking them down, recombining them into something new. Something hybrid. Something that no pure-element root could ever create.
It was slow.
It was humble.
It was limitless.
「 ————————————————— 」
「 ⚠️ NEW CULTIVATION TECHNIQUE ACQUIRED 」
「 」
「 Name: [Myriad Foundation Sutra — Volume 1 of ???] 」
「 Grade: UNRANKED (Does not fit any existing classification) 」
「 Description: A cultivation technique of unknown origin, designed for a spiritual root that draws from all elements without specializing in any. Transforms the cultivator's weakness — lack of elemental purity — into strength through hybrid energy refinement. 」
「 Effect: Allows absorption and refinement of ALL types of spiritual energy. Cultivation speed is slow but steady and has no known ceiling. Compatible with any environment. 」
「 Special: Technique evolves as the cultivator advances. Current volume covers Breath Condensation through Spirit Vein Opening. Future volumes are... locked. Unlock conditions unknown. 」
「 」
「 WARNING: This technique has never been recorded in any database. It may be unique to this tree. It may be unique to this HOST. 」
「 」
「 SYSTEM NOTE: I have a very bad feeling about this. 」
「 ————————————————— 」
The golden light faded.
The light-droplets stopped falling. The tree went still.
Chen Wei stepped back from the trunk, his mind buzzing with new knowledge. The technique was there — complete, detailed, instinctive. He didn't need to study it like a textbook. He understood it the way he understood breathing.
Because that's what it was.
Breathing.
The most basic, most fundamental, most overlooked act of living.
"Myriad Foundation Sutra," he murmured. "A technique for someone with everything and nothing at the same time."
「 How poetic. Did the tree teach you pretentiousness too? 」
"You're just mad because you couldn't identify it."
「 I am not 'mad.' I am CONCERNED. There is a difference. Being mad implies emotional investment. I am merely professionally worried that my Host has bound himself to a mysterious cultivation technique given by an unidentified ancient entity in a hidden location where a Nascent Soul cultivator vanished. 」
「 EVERYTHING about this screams 'trap.' 」
"But it doesn't feel like a trap."
「 Said every victim of every trap ever. 」
Chen Wei sat cross-legged on the island, closed his eyes, and began to circulate his energy according to the Myriad Foundation Sutra.
Breathe in: draw energy from the earth, the water, the air, the stone, the moss, the tree, the lake — everything.
Hold: let the energy mix in his dantian, where his Mud Grade root broke it down into its components and recombined them.
Breathe out: expel waste energy, refine the rest, send it flowing through his opened meridians.
It was... easy.
Not effortless — he could feel the strain, the way someone feels strain when exercising a muscle for the first time. But natural. Like the technique had been designed for his exact body, his exact root, his exact situation.
For ten minutes, he cultivated.
「 ————————————————— 」
「 Cultivation Progress: Breath Condensation Stage 4 — 12% → 14% 」
「 Note: This is genuinely impressive for ten minutes of cultivation. A normal Mud Grade root would achieve approximately 0.001% progress in the same time. 」
「 I still think this is suspicious. 」
「 But impressive. 」
「 Suspiciously impressive. 」
「 Impressively suspicious. 」
「 I'll stop now. 」
「 ————————————————— 」
🌑 PART 4: SOMETHING FALLS FROM THE SKY (IT'S ROUND AND IT'S SCREAMING)
Chen Wei cultivated for three hours.
Three hours of breathing, circulating, refining. Three hours of feeling his body slowly, steadily grow stronger. His meridians widened fractionally. His dantian's capacity increased. The warm flame in his core burned a little brighter.
「 Breath Condensation Stage 4 — 14% → 31% 」
Not fast by genius standards. A true prodigy with a Heaven Grade spiritual root and premium resources could advance a full stage in three hours. Chen Wei had gained 17% of a single stage.
But for a Mud Grade root?
It was a miracle.
He opened his eyes, stretched, and —
A sound echoed through the cavern.
Not from the tree. Not from the lake. From above.
A sound that every human being, in every world, in every dimension, would instantly recognize:
Screaming.
Very loud, very panicked, getting rapidly closer screaming.
Chen Wei looked up at the narrow gap in the cavern ceiling — the crack that led up, up, up to the ravine, to the cliff, to the surface world.
Something was falling through it.
Something large.
Something round.
Something that was screaming: "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA—"
It burst through the cavern ceiling gap, trailing dust and debris, tumbling end over end in a blur of torn blue robes and flailing limbs and —
Chen Wei squinted.
It was a boy.
A very, very fat boy.
A fat boy who was falling at terminal velocity toward the lake with all the aerodynamic grace of a thrown watermelon.
「 Incoming object detected. Mass: approximately 130 kilograms. Speed: terminal velocity. Composition: 60% body fat, 30% panic, 10% questionable life choices. 」
「 Impact in 3... 2... 1... 」
BOOOOOOM.
The fat boy hit the lake like a cannonball designed by someone who hated water. A geyser of luminous blue-green water erupted fifty meters into the air. Waves crashed against the island, the shore, the cavern walls. Fish — if there were fish — were having the worst day of their aquatic lives.
Chen Wei was drenched instantly.
He stood on the island, soaking wet, staring at the impact zone where the surface still churned and bubbled.
"...Did a fat kid just fall into my secret cavern?"
「 Technically, it's the tree's secret cavern. You're squatting. 」
The bubbling intensified. Then a head broke the surface — round-faced, gasping, sputtering, with cheeks so full they looked like they were storing food for winter (they probably were).
"HELP!" the fat boy screamed, thrashing. "I CAN'T SWIM! I CAN'T— glub —SWIM! SOMEONE— glub glub —HEEEELP!"
Chen Wei watched for approximately two seconds.
Then he dove in.
It took four minutes to drag the fat boy to shore. Not because the distance was far, but because the boy was 130 kilograms of pure, uncooperative panic. He clung to Chen Wei like a koala made of dough, screaming directly into his ear, and at one point accidentally kicked him in the kidney.
Finally, gasping and exhausted, Chen Wei hauled the boy onto the stone shore of the cavern and collapsed beside him.
They lay there. Both soaking wet. Both breathing hard. The fat boy was crying — big, unashamed tears streaming down his round cheeks.
"I'm alive," the fat boy whispered. "I'm alive, I'm alive, I'm alive, the ancestors are merciful, I'm ALIVE—"
He turned to Chen Wei. His eyes — small, bright, and surprisingly sharp in that round face — widened with genuine, overwhelming gratitude.
"You saved me! You— you actually saved me! No one has ever— I was falling and I thought I was dead and then WATER and then I was drowning and then YOU—"
He grabbed Chen Wei's hand with both of his, which were roughly the size and warmth of fresh steamed buns.
"I, Zhou Dapang, owe you my life! Whatever you need — ANYTHING — I, Fatty Zhou, will provide! Even if I have to — hic — even if I have to give you my last meat bun! AND I NEVER SHARE MY MEAT BUNS!"
「 ————————————————— 」
「 🎯 SIDE QUEST TRIGGERED! 」
「 "Save the Falling Meatball" 」
「 ✅ COMPLETE! 」
「 Reward: +100 EXP, +1 Loyalty Point (Zhou Dapang) 」
「 Bonus: You have acquired a companion! Whether you wanted one is irrelevant. He has imprinted on you like a baby duck. A very large baby duck. 」
「 ————————————————— 」
"Wait wait wait," Chen Wei said, sitting up. "Why were you falling down the cliff?"
Zhou Dapang's tearful gratitude instantly shifted to tearful outrage.
"THOSE BASTARDS! Those dog-fart sons of— excuse my language — those ABSOLUTE WASTES OF SPIRITUAL ENERGY pushed me!"
"Who pushed you?"
"Zhao Fenghao's lackeys! I was just— I was just walking near the cliff! Minding my own business! Eating my bun! And they said I was 'too fat to be a cultivator' and 'taking up space at the academy' and then they just—"
He made a pushing gesture so vigorous he almost fell over again.
"They just PUSHED me! Off the cliff! Over a BUN!"
「 Zhou Dapang. Age 15. Son of a traveling merchant family. Spiritual Root: Earth Grade, Low Tier. Cultivation: Breath Condensation Stage 2. Possesses a rare physical constitution: [Glutton Spiritual Body]. 」
「 The Glutton Spiritual Body allows the user to absorb spiritual energy from consumed food and materials. Extremely rare. Extremely undervalued because its users tend to be... round. 」
「 Also, he's telling the truth. His emotional readings show genuine distress and zero deception. He is exactly what he appears to be: a bullied fat kid who was thrown off a cliff over a meat bun. 」
「 ...This world is charming. 」
Chen Wei looked at Zhou Dapang. The boy was still ranting, his round face flushed with indignation, gesturing so wildly that his entire body jiggled.
A bullied kid thrown off a cliff.
Just like him.
"Zhao Fenghao," Chen Wei said quietly.
Zhou Dapang stopped mid-rant. "You know him?"
"Not personally. But I know the type. Rich family?"
"The Zhao Clan! One of Qinghe City's four noble families! His father is a Golden Core elder! He does whatever he wants and no one stops him because—"
"Because power makes people untouchable. Yeah." Chen Wei's eyes hardened. "I know."
A brief silence.
"Who pushed you off the cliff?" Zhou Dapang asked, suddenly perceptive despite his appearance.
"My cousin. Chen Hao."
"Chen Clan? The..."
"The joke branch. Yeah."
Zhou Dapang stared at him. Then his small eyes filled with fresh tears — but not sad tears this time. Something fiercer.
"BROTHER!"
He lunged forward and enveloped Chen Wei in a hug that could have crushed a small bear.
"ACK— YOU'RE CRUSHING ME—"
"WE ARE BROTHERS IN SUFFERING! BROTHERS OF THE CLIFF! THROWN AWAY BY THE WORLD BUT WE SURVIVED! WE—"
"I CAN'T BREATHE—"
"—WILL RISE TOGETHER AND SHOW THEM ALL!"
「 Fatty is surprisingly strong for someone at Breath Condensation Stage 2. That's the Glutton Spiritual Body. Physical power disproportionate to cultivation level. 」
「 Also, his bear hug is dealing 3 damage per second to you. Your HP is dropping. 」
"ZHOU DAPANG! LET GO OR YOU'LL KILL ME BEFORE THE CULTIVATION WORLD GETS THE CHANCE!"
Fatty Zhou released him, beaming through his tears.
"Sorry, Brother Chen! I'm just— I've never had a brother before! Everyone always— they always just—"
His voice cracked.
"They always just see the fat kid."
Chen Wei looked at this boy. This round, loud, emotional, bruised, thrown-away boy. And he saw himself — not the transmigrator self, but the original Chen Wei. The boy nobody wanted. The boy who wasn't worth saving.
"Well," Chen Wei said, "I see a guy with a rare spiritual body and enough stubbornness to survive a 300-meter fall. That's more than most people have."
Zhou Dapang's lower lip wobbled.
「 Oh no. He's going to cry again. 」
"BROTHER CHEN!"
「 He's crying again. 」
Another hug. More crushing. More damage notifications.
But Chen Wei didn't push him away this time.
He just sighed, patted the fat boy's back, and looked at the ancient tree across the lake.
Okay, he thought. I have a sarcastic System that turns into a hot woman to mess with me. I have a mysterious tree that gives me impossible techniques. I have a fat brother who cries at the drop of a hat. And I have a continent full of people who think I'm dead.
This is either the beginning of something incredible or the setup for the universe's longest joke.
「 Knowing you? Probably both. 」
Far away. Very far away.
In the Central Heavenly Lands — thousands of kilometers from the "beginner zone" of the Verdant East — something stirred.
In a palace that floated above the clouds, in a room that existed between moments of time, an old woman sat before a loom made of starlight. She had been weaving the threads of fate for nine thousand years.
She wove the threads of every living being on the Qianling Continent. Birth threads. Death threads. Destiny threads.
She knew every pattern. Every knot. Every tangle.
But today, she stopped.
Her ancient hands trembled.
She stared at her loom.
Because a new thread had appeared.
Not added. Not woven. It had simply... appeared. Materialized from nothing. It sat among the billions of other threads, humble, thin, almost invisible.
But it was connected to everything.
Every thread on the loom — every single one — had a tiny, almost imperceptible strand linking it to this new thread. Like a web. Like roots.
Like mud seeping into every crack.
The old woman tried to pull the thread. To examine it. To read its destiny.
The thread resisted.
For the first time in nine thousand years, a thread on the Loom of Fate refused to be read.
The old woman's hands shook.
"...Impossible," she whispered. "What has entered my loom?"
The thread pulsed once.
Then went still.
「 ————————————————— 」
「 CHAPTER 2 — END 」
「 」
「 Chen Wei Status: 」
「 Cultivation: Breath Condensation Stage 4 (31%) 」
「 HP: 82% (reduced by Fatty Zhou's hugs) 」
「 Skills: [Basic Regeneration Lv.1], [Mud Skin Lv.1], [Roots of the Nameless Tree Lv.1] 」
「 Techniques: [Myriad Foundation Sutra — Vol. 1] 」
「 Titles: "The Mud Immortal" 」
「 Companions: Zhou Dapang (Fatty Zhou) — Loyalty: MAXIMUM 」
「 System Form: Now capable of physical manifestation (Male/Female) 」
「 System Mood: Deeply Suspicious But Mildly Entertained 」
「 ————————————————— 」