"Since I was a child, my only desire was for everyone to truly accept me as their own. Yet, I feel like I could never be 'good enough' in anyone's eyes. The harder I tried to be kind, the more I seemed to be judged as flawed. As I grew older, my problems only multiplied, and I began to feel as though I could do nothing for anyone—that I would never truly belong. I was alone, walking my path in solitude.
But then, eventually, some friends entered my life. Since childhood, the word 'friend' had always been precious to me. I believed friendship was a world where we could speak our hearts without any hesitation. There was even a time when those friends were ready to give their all for me. Before anyone could utter a single word against me, they would stand in front of me like a shield.
Slowly, the days passed. As a group, we began to share many moments of joy. In every situation, we stood for one another like strong pillars of support. At that time, I felt like the luckiest person in the world to have two friends like them. A year passed in this happiness, but after that...
"Time, as it turns out, is never constant. As the days passed, the priorities of those friends he ones I once called my 'shields'—began to shift. New friends entered their lives, and new interests were born. The very people who once couldn't bear to hear a single word against me started leaving me behind in the crowd as they moved forward. Without even realizing it, I had become nothing more than an 'option' in that group.
Even when I was with them, I began to feel like a stranger. The subjects of their laughter changed, and slowly, I faded out of their plans. At first, I wondered if the fault was mine. I asked myself, 'Am I not enough? Should I try harder?' But the more I tried to hold on to them, the further away they drifted.
With time, I was struck by a harsh truth: in the temple where I was searching for a God, I was nothing more than a lifeless stone. I was only 'dear' and 'necessary' to them when they needed a shoulder to lean on or a selfish interest fulfilled. They used me only for their own needs, and once their work was done, they left me back in my solitude.
When they were happy and celebrating, there was no place for me in their joy. I had become merely a companion for their sorrows—a fallback for when they had no one else." Than...