"Alright, friend, the battery was definitely the issue. That's confirmed."
The shop owner looked thoroughly unamused as he delivered the verdict to Aoyama.
Pochita was strapped to Aoyama's chest in her carry pack, and Akane stood just behind him. Aoyama studied the laptop, now powered back on and running fine, gave it a satisfied nod, then smiled at the owner without a trace of embarrassment.
"Thanks so much, really!"
He pulled out his wallet and counted three hundred notes into the man's hand.
Akane had started to step forward to intervene, but he'd already handed it over.
"Don't forget my change, yeah?"
He called that last part over his shoulder, completely casual.
"...I know."
The shop owner took the cash with a flat expression, checked the bills with mechanical precision, then counted out ten in change and handed it back.
Aoyama examined the ten notes with the focused attention of someone personally inspecting each one for counterfeit status.
The owner's patience evaporated. "Sir, your device is repaired. I do have a business to run."
In reality, his shop currently had exactly two customers: Aoyama and Akane.
Aoyama didn't take offense. He tucked the laptop back into the bag with a grin, caught Akane's eye, and the two of them walked out together.
The owner watched them go, muttering under his breath. "Made barely anything on this one. These young couples are bad for business. If she'd walked in alone..."
He still lamented what he'd almost had. He'd worked up the full pitch: GPU damage, severe, eight thousand to replace, seven-eight with the discount. He'd had a couple of second-hand 690 cards in stock. If he'd played it right, that was a five-thousand net minimum, more if he got to keep what he swapped out. Ten thousand upside, easy.
Then her boyfriend had appeared out of nowhere, asked all the right questions, and demanded a live fault demonstration on the spot.
He hadn't had a choice. He'd done the honest repair. The girl wasn't gettable anymore.
The owner was a professional. You cut your losses, you took the work that was there, you stayed in business. But he prayed sincerely that female university students across the country would remain single. It was just better for his margins.
---
Akane had already started speed-walking out of the district, glanced back, and found Aoyama strolling along at his usual unhurried pace.
"Aoyama, why aren't you moving faster?"
She doubled back, kept her voice low.
He looked at her, genuinely puzzled. "Why would I rush?"
His tone was perfectly normal. No edge to it, no self-consciousness -- just actual curiosity about why urgency was the appropriate response here.
"You... I... the look on that owner's face!"
Akane struggled to articulate it, then gave up.
"We were normal customers," Aoyama said, easy and unbothered. "We didn't scam him. Fair exchange. Nothing to run from."
"But--"
She thought about it. That... was technically accurate.
"Also," he said, "they made money on that 290. Trust me. Even when it looks like I know what I'm doing, they're not walking away empty-handed."
He didn't know the exact going rate on laptop batteries, but he knew how retail worked. The margin was in there somewhere.
Akane exhaled slowly. "...Alright."
"See? Nothing to stress over."
"That said, thanks for paying. I'll give it back."
"Nah." He waved it off. "I don't really care about money. And..."
"Woof! Woof!"
Out of nowhere, Aoyama barked twice.
Akane startled so hard she almost dropped the laptop bag.
Pochita poked her head out of the carry pack and gave him an absolutely baffled look.
The passersby and shop vendors nearby all turned to stare.
"What," Akane said flatly, "was that."
"Dogs are man's best friend!" Aoyama announced, cheerfully.
"...I don't know what that means."
She studied him for a moment, then tried carefully: "Are you trying to say we're friends?"
"Aren't we?"
He gave her his most wounded look.
"We, yes! Yes. Yes we are friends."
Akane pressed her lips together. She genuinely could not figure out if his head worked correctly.
He wasn't stupid. He'd handled the shop situation completely competently. He'd known exactly what the owner had tried to pull and stopped it without making a scene. None of that was a dumb person's work.
If Aoyama could have heard her internal evaluation, he would have happily confirmed her conclusion: the two categories were not mutually exclusive. There was a third option between 'stupid' and 'perfectly normal.'
That option was 'genuinely unhinged.'
And that wasn't necessarily a bad thing.
"I'm just saying," he went on, "I'd rather be a dog than a grovelling sycophant. A loyal hound is something else. The issue is whether the owner actually cares."
He looked affectionately at Pochita in the carry pack. "Pochita's got people who love her. So she's the happiest dog in the world."
"Aoyama." Akane's voice had gone very flat. "You are a human being. That is the point I am making."
"How can you be sure I'm not a small dog?"
Her eye twitched.
"Okay so here's the thing," he said, "I'm kind of like a..."
He started dropping toward the pavement on all fours.
"Stop."
Akane grabbed his arm and hauled him upright. She pulled him toward the street at a brisk clip before he could do anything else embarrassing.
"Hey, hey...!"
They cleared the district in record time.
The bystanders who'd witnessed the whole thing exchanged looks.
Kids these days.
[Translated and Rewritten by Shika_Kagura]
A/N: The unhinged behaviour in this chapter is loosely inspired by a real incident involving a famous manga artist who once dramatically convinced himself he was a third-grade girl. Consider it creative license for the protagonist's character.