Chapter 268: Get Up and Eat Some Midnight Snacks!!
After putting in tremendous effort to chase out the three fools—who were acting like unleashed huskies—Shinji flopped back into his chair with an exhausted sigh.
"Seriously, not a single one of them gives me peace of mind."
He pressed a hand to his forehead, sighing again.
"I really wonder if those three idiots can actually make it in the idol world…"
Being an idol is all about popularity. But to be a good idol? You can't just rely on looks or charm—you need solid acting, singing, dancing, variety show skills... No one expects perfection in every area, but at least be passable across the board.
"Whatever. It's not like I'm relying on idol revenue to turn a profit anyway."
He yawned, stretched, and stood up, ready to finally head home.
"Ophelia, let's call it a day. Wrap things up early today," Shinji said to his petite secretary. "EMIYA's throwing a party tonight. No way I'm missing that."
However—
"Boss, did you forget something?"
Thud!
A stack of paperwork, thicker than even Waver's head, slammed down on his desk.
"…What the hell is this?"
Shinji stared at the terrifying pile of documents, his heart skipping a beat.
"It's the backlog. You've been busy filming your movie and promoting Spy Among Spies lately, remember? You haven't had time to touch these."
"Can't you just dump it all on Udagawa-senpai…?"
"Udagawa-san already handled everything she could. This is what's left for you."
With a sweet but firm smile, Ophelia declared, "Since you're finally in the office today, you can take care of it all. No running away."
"…So the party—?"
Ophelia giggled sweetly. "Dinner party? Boss, at this point, even dinner is looking unlikely. And you're dreaming about a party?"
"What the—?! You don't have to go that far!"
Her face leaned in close, eyes glinting with an eerie light.
"Boss, you're not leaving until every last document is signed. ♥"
"You demon. Ophelia, I definitely didn't raise you to be this kind of girl."
Her only reply was handing him a pen and the company seal.
"..."
It's human nature to slack off when given the chance. Deep down, Shinji knew he couldn't escape these tasks forever. Still, he'd held on to the faintest glimmer of hope…
"What if I just finish half—"
"Don't even think about it. Everything. Tonight," Ophelia said with a fake-cheerful tone that carried zero negotiation. "Don't worry, though. No matter how late it takes, I'll stay right here with you."
"…Thanks, I guess."
It sounded like a touching gesture, but considering she was just there to monitor him, Shinji wasn't exactly moved.
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In the end, Shinji never made it to his own victory party.
Forget about a celebratory feast—by the time he finished processing all the paperwork, it was the middle of the night.
And he hadn't even eaten dinner.
"Damn, it's this late already? What is this, a real-life Midnight Diner episode?"
He rubbed his growling stomach and grumbled.
"I'll treat you to a late-night snack," Ophelia said, massaging her sore wrist. "Sorry for keeping you here so late."
"It's still work," Shinji waved it off. "I'm the boss. I should be the one treating you."
Even though Ophelia had technically held him hostage, Shinji knew deep down there was no escaping the workload. So, he didn't bear any grudge.
"Alright then, let's go pig out—"
Unfortunately, Shinji's plan to reward himself with a glorious midnight meal was suddenly interrupted by a phone call.
Ring! Ring!
"Mordred?"
"Master! Master! Emergency!"
Her voice blared with urgency from the other end.
"What happened?" Shinji frowned.
Did something serious happen? Was there an intruder? A rogue magus attack?
"It's Father! She's too hungry to sleep!!"
"…What?"
Shinji almost dropped his phone right then and there.
"Grab some snacks on your way home, will you? Lancelot and the others came over to freeload dinner, and everyone didn't get enough to eat."
Mordred's cheerful voice rang from the phone, but it made Shinji's eyebrow twitch… twice.
"Can't you just have Archer cook something?"
"Geez, Master, you're really dense. If we had ingredients to make midnight snacks, why would I be calling you?"
"…Good point. Guess I'm the idiot here."
Shinji let out a long sigh as his expression twisted through several shades of frustration.
What Mordred said did make sense—but being called dumb by her still rubbed him the wrong way.
'Tch… It's this late and now I have to go buy snacks? That basically means I'm stuck grabbing stuff from the convenience store.'
Not wanting to punish his own stomach with cheap junk food, Shinji briefly entertained the idea of just staying overnight at the office to dodge the whole situation.
Unfortunately for him, someone had anticipated that thought.
"Onii-sama, don't even think about hiding out at work," Sakura's voice cut in as she grabbed the phone. "I want snacks too! Things got way too rowdy at home tonight—I need something sweet to help me sleep."
"Eating sweets this late? Careful, you'll end up with cavities… or a few extra pounds."
"Come on, I'm a magus, remember? And you're the one who taught me slimming spells, Onii-sama."
"…You got me there."
"Relax. Just bring back the receipt and I'll reimburse you."
'Do I look like I'm broke?! That's not the issue here!'
Shinji groaned internally. She completely missed the point.
"Onii-sama?"
"Hhhss… Fiiine! Got it, got it, you terrifying little Minister of Finance."
With a sigh of surrender, Shinji gave in to his sister's request. "I'll bring back the snacks. Make sure you eat and go to sleep after, alright?"
"Master, I want instant noodles!!"
Another voice rang from the background—Arturia's this time.
"…Noted."
Shinji hung up the call and turned to his secretary with a look of apology.
"Sorry. Looks like our late-night snack date's gonna have to be delayed."
Ophelia smiled understandingly. "It's alright. Let's just hit the convenience store instead."
Truth be told, she was a little disappointed they wouldn't be enjoying a quiet meal together—but shopping for midnight snacks together had its own kind of charm.
Not that Shinji had any romantic thoughts about it.
Afraid of being hounded by the girls back home, he dragged Ophelia with him and headed to the nearest convenience store at full speed. They grabbed what they needed and left without so much as glancing at the nightly half-price bento war.
Shinji had a simple plan: drop off the snacks at home, then share the leftovers with Ophelia as a makeshift dinner.
But when they finally returned, stomachs growling and arms full of food…
They found all the girls—Sakura, Arturia, Mordred, and even Medusa—fast asleep, huddled together in a cozy pile, snuggling into each other's pillows with peaceful expressions.
The room was filled with a warm, orange glow, and the scene looked like a wholesome CG straight out of a slice-of-life visual novel.
Shinji, meanwhile, was radiating dark energy like a cursed spirit.
'Didn't they say they couldn't sleep because they were hungry?! Why the hell are they sleeping so soundly now?!'
"Yo, Shinji. Welcome back."
EMIYA, possibly the only decent Servant in the house tonight, gave a sheepish smile as he took the convenience store bags from Shinji.
"They all passed out not long after calling you… Are you hungry? I'll warm something up for you."
Sensing the storm brewing on Shinji's face, Archer wisely made his retreat before he could get caught in the blast radius.
"Boss…?"
Ophelia looked at him nervously, afraid he might snap and start throwing food.
But Shinji? He was eerily calm. Smiling serenely, he walked over to the bed and gently stroked Mordred's hair, his expression like a kindly father watching over his sleeping daughter.
"…Sleeping so peacefully, huh?"
Then his smile twisted into a wicked grin.
"You really thought I'd say that, huh?!"
With a dramatic flourish, Shinji hurled the entire snack bag straight into the sleeping girls' faces.
"WAKE THE HELL UP!! You said you couldn't sleep without snacks, right?! WELL GUESS WHAT, I BROUGHT THEM!! NOW GET YOUR LAZY ASSES UP AND EAT!!!"
"AAAHHH!! Master, that was a sneak attack! Totally uncalled for!!"
Mordred jolted awake, snacks bouncing off her head.
<+>
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