Also known as: No More Nap-Based Cultivation
The wind over Mount Chaos changed.
Not the kind of dramatic, stormy wind full of screaming spirits and lightning — no, this was worse.
This wind carried bureaucracy.
Lin Qian sniffed the air. "It smells like... policy manuals."
Wei Long looked up from his fourth nap of the morning."Is someone rewriting reality again?"
Before she could answer, the clouds above parted with surgical precision — not cracked open like before, but measured, like someone had taken a compass and scalpel to the sky.
From the opening descended a man.
He did not glow.
He did not roar.
He… straightened his collar.
His robe was gray. His steps made no sound.Every part of him screamed precision.
Even his sword had a ruler etched along the blade.
The wind whispered:
"He is the one the Heavens summon when chaos dares to laugh."
He stopped five feet from Wei Long and announced,"I am Zhen Shu, the Architect.You broke the Heavenly Trial. I am here to correct you."
Wei Long yawned. "That sounds like a you problem."
Zhen Shu did not blink. "You are an imbalance. A paradox. Your path is not written in the Dao."
Wei Long stood. "That's because I keep forgetting to write things down."
Zhen Shu unsheathed his sword.
With a single motion, he drew a square in mid-air — and a glowing cage materialized around Wei Long.
"I am here to seal your path.To overwrite your legend.To restructure your fate."
Wei Long poked the glowing bars. "Did… did you just imprison me inside a math equation?"
Lin Qian moved to intervene.
Zhen Shu raised one finger.
"Secondary elements must not interfere. You are background noise."
Lin Qian looked offended. "I am at least character development!"
Inside the glowing cage, Wei Long sat cross-legged.
"So what happens now?"
Zhen Shu began conjuring glyphs — formulas of fate, equations of qi, diagrams so complex even time seemed to hesitate.
"I will rebuild your foundation. Line by line. You will become predictable."
Wei Long narrowed his eyes.
"Boring."
Zhen Shu smiled for the first time. "That's the point."
The glyphs floated toward Wei Long, trying to overwrite his essence:
• Replace nap-based cultivation with structured breathing.• Remove accidental techniques.• Insert mandatory breakthrough conditions.• Erase Goat Empathy Trait.
Wei Long stood up.
Then, calmly… tripped.
He tripped so hard, the bars of the cage bent inward.
The glyphs spun in midair, confused.
He reached for balance, knocked over a tea kettle, spilled liquid onto a sacred symbol — which fizzled, popped, and rewrote itself into a duck.
Zhen Shu stared.
"That's not possible."
Wei Long stood, holding the now-sizzling kettle.
"I told you. I'm not structured."
A random bolt of lightning — from a clear blue sky — struck the cage and short-circuited it.
Zhen Shu reeled back.
"You are… a walking contradiction! A rejection of logic!"
Wei Long bowed slightly.
"Thank you. I do try."
Zhen Shu growled. "Then I will not fix you. I will erase you."
He raised his blade.
Wei Long, suddenly serious, whispered:"You probably shouldn't do that."
"Why?"
"Because every time someone tries to fight me seriously… they lose in dumber and dumber ways."
Zhen Shu charged.
The fight lasted three seconds.
Zhen Shu's own footing slipped on a patch of spilled tea leaves.
He spiraled into a statue of Enlightened Radish, which toppled into the pond.
The pond — for reasons no one understood — erupted in a geyser of spiritual koi fish that carried Zhen Shu into the clouds.
He vanished with a final shout:"This is statistically improbableeeeeee—!"
Silence.
Wei Long looked at Lin Qian.
"…Did I just defeat cosmic order with... foot friction?"
She nodded slowly.
"Yes, Master. Again."
Wei Long sat back down.
"Tell the heavens to send someone less… symmetrical next time."
Far above, the Watcher exhaled.
"He broke the Architect.I will not send another piece.I will come… myself."
To be continued...