Current Alias:Boom-san Shippuden Uzumaki Gomu Gomu Flexo Uchiha McDripson the III
[Author's Note appears mid-chapter like a pop-up ad]
AUTHOR:Boom.Listen.We've made it to Chapter 7 with zero plot.Just vibes, destruction, and emotional burrito breakdowns.But if we go one more chapter without a story arc, the readers will start throwing virtual chappals at me.We need an arc. Now.
BOOM:An arc?? You want me to have a purpose??
Bro, half our readers are unemployed gremlins who skipped therapy for this.They haven't finished a single thing in life — not school, not a novel, not even a YouTube ad.But now they suddenly want narrative structure?
Boom turns to directly face the reader, camera zooms in like it's The Office
BOOM:Ohhh, so now you want an arc?
Where was this energy when you were eating cold cereal with hot water at 2AM?
Where was this energy when your phone was on 2% and you still opened TikTok instead of charging it?
You want arcs?Your life hasn't even had a prologue.
You've been in filler since birth, champ.
BOOM:Let me guess — you skipped school today just to read this.Laughed for 2 minutes.Then cried because Boom has more character development than your GPA.
Look at you.
Still in your PJs.Your phone charger wrapped around your ankle like a life support system.Breathing in instant noodle fumes and trauma.
But sure, let's do an arc.
BOOM pulls out a whiteboard titled: "Multiverse Arc Brainstorm That Will Absolutely Not Work"
🌍 Option 1: Naruto World
BOOM:Send me to Naruto's world.
Why?
So I can end the war in 3 seconds by vaporizing half of Konoha and just yelling:
"It's called therapy, Sasuke."
Also:Why did that man fight 500 episodes just to still live in a house with zero furniture?
I'll sneeze once and Itachi's entire tragic backstory will be replaced with a Taco Bell receipt.
🍖 Option 2: Attack on Titan World
BOOM:Oh yes, please. Put me in AOT.
Let me pull up mid-Rumbling and accidentally dropkick Eren into a different genre.
Whole series ends in 6 minutes and one nosebleed.
Me: "I just wanted to pet a horse."
Result: Paradise Island turns into Boomville, Population: Not You.
🔥 Option 3: Demon Slayer World
BOOM:Tanjiro: "I must avenge my family."
Me: sneezes
Entire mountain explodes.
Zenitsu dies from emotional damage before I even move.
Muzan pulls up like: "I am the final villain."
Me: "Hold my emotional burrito."
⚔️ Option 4: Genshin Impact Universe
BOOM:I'll land in Mondstadt and vaporize Paimon by accident.
Not even sorry.She had it coming.
I'll try to cook a dish and evaporate the entire continent.
Lisa: "This book is over 1,000 years old."
Me: "Not anymore."🔥BOOM🔥
🥲 Bonus Roast Mode Activated
BOOM:Y'all want arcs so bad, but can't finish basic things.
You got:
78 tabs open
3 assignments pending
A job interview at 9 AM
And yet, here you are…Reading a novel about a dude who accidentally sneezes away galaxies.
Reader, your real arc is figuring out how to cook rice without burning it.
AUTHOR (me, nervously writing):Boom, please, let's just pick a world and start a meaningful arc...
BOOM:Fine. Let's make a new world.One where:
People get isekai'd into customer service jobs.
Dragon balls are used to wish for emotional stability.
And every villain is just a Twitter user with 4 followers and too much confidence.
Boom looks directly into your soul.
BOOM:An arc is coming.But it's not what you expect.It's called:
"The Arc of Consequences: Where I Accidentally Become a King, Get Married by Mistake, Start a Religion, and Somehow Adopt a Planet."
📢 Reader Comments:
💬 "Boom's roast made me uninstall life."
💬 "Not him ending anime plots faster than Netflix cancellations."
💬 "My phone died while reading. It's for the best."
💬 "The Paimon roast gave me religious clarity."
💬 "I've never been this bullied and healed at the same time."