There are three places in school that no one willingly enters:
The Principal's Office
The Girl's Bathroom after a spicy ramen challenge
The Nurse's Office
And yet, there I was—bleeding slightly from the eyebrow thanks to a rogue flying geometry set—standing outside the one room even the ghosts avoided.
Lilith said something cryptic this morning like, "If you hear jazz music and feel unworthy of love, run."
I should've listened.
Scene: The Nurse's Office – 12:42 PM
The door creaked open by itself. Not ominous at all.
Inside, the air was thick with incense and… was that vanilla and crushed regret?
A woman stood near a cabinet, dressed in the official nurse's uniform, modified just enough to inspire nosebleeds and lawsuits. Long black hair in a loose braid. Glasses that glinted like danger. She turned slowly.
And smiled.
It was the kind of smile that made you feel like an ant on a magnifying glass.
"Oh dear," she purred. "You're Lilith's little darling, aren't you?"
WARNING.
INTIMACY LEVELS CRITICAL.
RECOMMEND IMMEDIATE PANIC.
Flashback: Lilith's Advice, Replayed in My Head
"If Nurse Hysteria offers you tea, politely decline. If she offers you candy, run. If she offers you her 'private diagnostics,' kiss your mortality goodbye."
Back to the Office: Blood Pressure & Flirting
"I see you had a little accident," she said, lightly brushing my temple with an absurdly soft tissue.
"Yeah, geometry set. It… uh… had sharp edges."
"You poor, delicate thing."
She leaned in.
Too close.
Her cleavage defied physics and possibly the Geneva Convention.
"Would you like me to take a… closer look?"
I briefly considered transferring schools, countries, and possibly realities.
Scene: Hell Breaks Loose (Again)
Before Nurse Hysteria could unleash whatever "diagnostic" tools she had hidden in that absurdly oversized drawer labeled Do Not Open Without Consent, the door burst open.
"STEP AWAY FROM THE BOY, HARLOT."
Lilith stood there. Glowing. Wings out. Heels sharp enough to cut glass. And visibly furious.
"I was just checking his temperature," Nurse Hysteria said innocently, still holding a thermometer like it was a love letter.
"With your cleavage?!"
"That's where I keep it warm."
Kazuki.exe Has Crashed
The argument devolved into ancient demonic insults, at least two references to an apocalyptic dance-off, and a brief but terrifying moment where time stopped and a portal to the 5th circle of hell opened behind the filing cabinet.
Also, my eyebrow stopped bleeding on its own out of sheer fear.
Eventually, I was escorted out by the janitor (who I strongly suspect is secretly a retired archangel). He patted me on the back and whispered, "Run, son. Run fast."
Later That Night – In the Bathtub of Shame
So let's recap:
My stepmother nearly dueled the school nurse to the death
I may be permanently banned from the nurse's office
Ishtar the succubus transfer student texted me "u looked cute today 🖤"
Oh, and my bathwater spontaneously boiled when I thought about her for too long.
"Great," I muttered. "Now even my hormones are cursed."
End of Chapter 4
✅ Call to Action:
🚑 Will Kazuki survive another day of supernatural seduction? Can Lilith keep the other women away from him without inciting another demonic war?
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