Incidentally, the kitsunes—all except Onee-sama—had been waiting for over an hour for their mother to finish her bout of insanity so they could finally go in and greet her.
"Anyway, just keep concealing your presence as Onee-sama taught us," Gold said, wiping a tear from her eye as she peered into the hall, watching their mother frantically embrace the inanimate objects as if they were cherished companions.
"I… t-truly believe we should not leave Haha-ue by herself so often," Green whispered, pressing her trembling hand against her mouth as tears welled up. "If this continues, she may one day completely b-break... and I won't be able to endure it."
"But… why…? Why does Haha-ue talk to the lifeless objects in the first place?" Blue asked in a hushed voice, burying her tear-streaked face against Silver's arm. "It doesn't make any sense! And it's heartbreaking to watch."
"Quiet, you buffoon!" Gold hissed sharply, pointing at her. "We are the cause of this! Haha-ue is just the victim here!"
"But the way she seriously does it..." Brown frowned with unease. "I just hope she doesn't actually think they're alive or anything."
"Don't mince words, Brown," Red laid a firm hand on his shoulder. "Haha-ue has nearly lost her mind. We abandoned her for too long, and this madness is the result of our foolish neglect!"
Both she and Brown broke into silent whimpers, shoulders trembling as they tried to muffle the sounds.
"Is... Is... Is th-th-there truly nothing that c-c-c-can be done?" Shiro stammered, her sobs violent as tears poured in such excess that they formed a flowing, glistening stream down the marble stairs.
"Calm yourself, Shiro!" Green immediately wrapped her arms around her. "Haha-ue is still with us... she is just barely holding on."
"Then let me go to her! Allow me to meet my Haha-ue!" Shiro cried, struggling to break free.
"Silence yourself!" Gold quickly clamped a hand over her mouth while Green restrained her from behind. "What do you think will happen if Haha-ue realizes we have been watching her seriously converse with the furniture? Do you wish for her to kill herself, you parent murderer?!"
"G-Gomenasai! I'm not a parent murderer!" Shiro clutched her head in despair.
"I know you're not! So stay put and—"
"What in the Supreme Lord's name are you all doing, hiding there?"
Onee-sama's sharp voice suddenly cut through the air from the bottom of the staircase. Her eyes narrowed at the sight of the watery mess Shiro had left soaking the floor.
'Oh no!' Gold's thoughts screamed in panic. 'This crazy one is back already?! I thought she would spend more time buried in her glorious Library!'
"Uh, Onee-sama, please lower your voice..." Green urgently gestured for her to quiet down.
"I trust you have not gotten yourselves into any mischief already?" Onee-sama asked as she calmly ascended the steps toward the throne room, her expression stern as stone.
Gold, unable to hold back, grabbed her sleeve and pointed toward their mother, who was still inside, happily chatting away with the inanimate objects.
"Tsk. She's at it again?" Onee-sama frowned, unimpressed.
"Yes… We lingered far too long in the Library," Gold lamented, her fists clenched in frustration. "See? This is why I hate studying! Now Haha-ue won't sto—"
"Haha-ue! Cease this madness this instant!"
Gold and Green turned to stone where they stood, horrified that Onee-sama had addressed their mother directly.
She had already marched into the throne room before either of them realized it.
"Ah, the author granted Gold and Green this gag trick!" Red raised a hand in outrage. "Playing favorites, I see!"
Inside the throne room, Tamayō sat frozen on her throne, fiddling nervously with her thumbs, her face flushed a deathly red.
"H... How long… have you b-been watching me?" Her voice came out barely audible.
"Does it matter?" Onee-sama folded her arms, glaring down at her mother. "Now tell me, what productive thing did you accomplish while we were away? Did you wash the dishes? Did you cook? Did you clean?"
"Ah... Uhm... F-Forgive me..." Tamayō bowed her head, unable to look her daughter in the eyes.
"Frankly, I am disappointed!" Onee-sama's voice cracked like a whip. "I even told you to accompany us, yet your unsavory dishonesty held you back! And to think you went so far as to name them—what in the Shadows is a 'Right Wall-san' supposed to be?!"
Tamayō flinched as though struck, covering her face with both hands and nodding quietly in shame.
"Huh? Look into someone's eyes when they are speaking to you!" Onee-sama barked, seizing Tamayō's wrists and forcefully trying to pull her hands away from her face. "Awkwardness like this is what makes you a laughingstock in the Supreme Lord's court! Get your act together for goodness' sake!"
"I-I'm… so sorry…" Tamayō whispered.
Brown and Red exchanged wry, uneasy smiles as they watched from the doorway.
"Stone-hearted..." Brown muttered under his breath.
"She's a demon," Red added dryly.
Brown and Red respectively remarked.
"Haha-ue, you can stop now!" Shiro cried, "We are here now; so abandon all those inanimate friends of yours!"
"Haha-ue, you really shouldn't do things like that," Blue tugged nervously at Tamayō's sleeve, her eyes brimming with unease. "You looked like a crazy person, and it honestly scared me."
"I agree," Silver added flatly. "If anyone else had witnessed that scene, they would have you locked away in some remote mountain retreat... Although, truth be told, I had already foreseen this deranged display back when we were still at the library."
"Ah! No wonder you suddenly started crying in the library!" Red exclaimed, clapping her hands together. "But why didn't you say anything sooner?!"
"Eh? You mean, why didn't I expose Haha-ue's eccentricity for all to see and mock?" Silver turned to her, tone dripping with sarcasm.
"Fair point!" Red admitted with a nod.
A sudden gust of wind then tore through the throne room—
SLAP!
Gold's hand came down furiously, swatting away Onee-sama's grasp from Tamayō.
"Ah. They've already reformed," Red deadpanned.
"Enough! You are making Haha-ue sad with your tactless remarks!" Green cried out, rushing forward and embracing their sulking mother.
"So what if she talks to herself like a weirdo?!" Gold shouted defiantly, standing tall. "Is it so wrong for our Haha-ue to simply act as herself?! We are the villains here, not her! We are the ones who deserve to be scolded! Now then: on the count of three, let's all apologize properly to Haha-ue's beloved friends! One... Two... Three!"
"We are sorry, Inanimate Objects-minasan!" they all chorused together, bowing in unison.
SMASH!
Onee-sama's hand struck Gold's head so hard it buried into the polished ground, drilling a neat dent into the floor.
"P… Polished Floor Oji-san!" Green cried out dramatically, mourning the injury of one of Tamayō's inanimate companions.
"Enough fooling around," Onee-sama glared, her voice sharp and cold. "As long as I exist in this family, there will be order…"
Her gaze then shifted to Tamayō.
Their mother sat frozen, her face beet red, fingers fidgeting helplessly, nearly overwhelmed by disorientation as she tried to think of what she could possibly do to redeem herself in her children's eyes.
With a sigh, Onee-sama swatted Green away as casually as if brushing away an empty can, and then sat herself down beside Tamayō.
Without a word, she gently pulled her mother down, resting her head upon her lap, and began calmly stroking her long, dark, flowing hair.
Tamayō's eyes widened in shock. She had expected harsher admonishment, not this impulsive tenderness.
"You overreact to everything, Haha-ue," Onee-sama said softly, a thin smile tugging at her lips. "Understand this: the entire world may abandon you, but we will never forsake you, no matter what. You are our precious mother. We love you sincerely. So, please... enough strangeness for the day, alright?"
A single tear fell from Tamayō's wide eyes as she stared up in disbelief.
"Purple one..." She exhaled, "So Kiseru-chan and LRS-sama were right?! Y-You harbor illicit intentions toward me!!"
"..."
The entire hall fell silent, the air frozen as Tamayō progressed to mischievously poking Onee-sama's cheek.
"Ah! Onee-sama has turned into stone again!" Red shouted, pointing dramatically. "Ghh! One day, I swear I'll learn that trick for myself!"