A loud doorbell woke me up. I squinted my eyes! Who could that be? "I don't have any visitors today.
I dashed behind the door. I had a bad feeling from the moment i heard the faint sound of footsteps coming up the stairs
He's pressing the door's passcode and I can hear it. He tried ringing the doorbell again when he was unable to open it.
Blaire open the door! What did i hear? Big brother? No If it were him he would have already let himself in. I slowly opened the door
He's still wearing his uniform. A pristine perfectly fitted uniform. I was taken aback but I kept my mouth shut about his presence.
Long time no see how have you been? "Why do you look at me like that? Won't you at least hug me? I remained silent and simply gazed at him wondering what he had come here for.
I knew it i had a feeling so peculiar but I didn't expect it to be like this. Why did this man comes here all of sudden and dressed in his uniform like this.
Nothing good ever happens every time he comes here I am sure there is nothing new going on with me that he doesn't already know about.
How long has it been since you returned to Korea?. "I dared to ask despite the fact that i already knew the answer.
Just a while ago at twelve o'clock I just got off the airport and I didn't have anywhere to stay so I thought I'd just stay here with you because I knew you'd still be awake at this time. This is ridiculous he didn't have anywhere to stay?
Is that so?".. Don't make me laugh. Uncle if you're going to lie make an effort you're too obvious for me to believe. There're so many hotels out there why can't you go there? Instead of bothering me?
Do you know what time it is?... At two in the morning you could be mistaken for a thief. This monster he dared show up in front of me
The last time I meet my uncle was about 2 years ago. if I'm not mistaken. Since then a lot of things have happened. It felt like since that day my life has always been in danger but now he's back. He will make it hell again I can't shake the feeling that his return will bring chaos and uncertainty. as if a storm has rolled back into my life. The memories of our last encounter linger. I need to brace myself for whatever turmoil he might unleash this time.
I nearly died while removing excavation he forced me to do it... I can't cry for help. I've always wished I could just die that day.
Then i almost died again from complications during the surgery i thought i wouldn't be able to survive. I had so many stones according to the doctor I had been suffering from it for a long time so he asked me how i managed to endure the pain for three years.
There was also one bastard who tested my patience. Three times on the fourth time I snapped and nearly beat him to death after that I was discharged from the Military Army without even fulfilling half of my mandatory service. It was a bitter pill to swallow knowing that my rage had cost me everything I had worked for. Now I was left to navigate a world that felt foreign, grappling with the consequences of that fateful day.
A fifteen years old girl that time was awakened to violence. Can you imagine a fifteen years old was once used to be an innocent face. "But the truth is worse than the devil.
I don't want to do things that I know are wrong but they made me suffer so much just to get what they wanted. It feels like I'm trapped in a cycle of pain unable to escape the expectations placed upon me. Each day becomes a struggle to find my own voice amid the chaos searching for a glimmer of hope in the darkness.
You should have called me first before coming here my brother is not here
Nathaniel isn't here? When is he going to return?
How am i supposed to know? He left me alone five months ago and I haven't heard from him since.
Isn't there any way to reach him?.. "Don't underestimate him. If there is I've already done it.
If he was that easy to get hold of. He wouldn't be named Nathaniel for nothing. Nobody knows that better than you. Have you already forgotten what he's capable of?
What should I do then? I must speak with your brother. Anyway, let's eat first. I bought some food on the street earlier because I'm hungry. He displayed the paper bags in his possession.
I held my stomach it was rumbling. and I realized I hadn't eaten last night.. We went to the small kitchen I sat at the table and he sat on the other side. What's the deal with this sad meal? Blaire don't you eat healthy foods?
He's staring at the food spread on the table. Rice with veggies Beans and Soup with Fried fish. Can this still be called food?. He asked in disbelief. "Where do you put your money and eat like this?
What do you expect from a poor young lady living on her own? So. how about you? Do you get fancy food in the military? "Naturally we live a difficult life if the food were terrible there would be a riot. In addition I am not employed by the military.
From what I've heard it's the same thing isn't it? Even though the name itself is respectable people still queue up halfway around the world to join. if the rumors are accurate and it's even more ruthless than the military.
Conquistador Organization Huh?" You've mentioned it before. But i can't recall a name that long.
Having a simple meal like this with him for the first time in a long time isn't all that bad I can see he's changed. I'm not certain whether that's a compliment or a complaint.
When he holds chapsticks his hands move elegantly. His hands look like Nathan's. He looks just as small as Nathan does. Naturally he looks like him. in terms of genetically He is my mother's brother. I don't think we look alike though because i don't resemble him at all.
Next month is your mother's third memorial correct? Yes, the lunar calendar indicates that it is on the seventeenth. Why did you ask so abruptly? Will you be there? I doubt I am able to. I apologize "What else could I expect from this demon?
Actually, I last saw uncle at Mom's funeral and he hasn't stopped since then. My life began to fall apart at that point because I rebelled and was unable to accept my mother's death. which is why he compelled me to enlist in the military. despite the fact that i was only fifteen at the time. I was always irritated when they attempted to obstruct me, and I had no one to talk to.
Although he is a bothersome and inconvenient house guest in my opinion he would be warmly received wherever else he goes in the world. "Who would have thought that the person who once ruined my life dared to step on my life's path again?
To be honest. I have no idea when he will return. but would you like me to ask him to give you a call when he does? "No it doesn't matter anymore. there's no time for that
At this moment I'm being honest with you Blaire! You are the main reason I came here I have a hunch that he's going to do something crazy now. What else is he going to do this time? I've been leading a quiet life for two years because I'm so sick of covering his useless terrible troubles . And for no apparent reason now he's bothering me once more because of futile reasons?
I'm not sure why you're trying to find my brother. but you are aware that he and i are didn't communicate right? He left me without saying anything so i don't have no idea how to contact him. He smiled. I'm terrified of this individual. He seems capable of controlling me at any time.
You know what Blaire. Between you and Nathaniel one of you is my son! Son really? You have the courage to say that.. Didn't you ashamed of yourself? I shouted
God knows how much you made my life miserable. And now you have the courage to claimed that one of us is your son? "I'll just remind you that I'm not a man but a woman don't be delusional you'll get that engraved in your brain uncle. And what does nonsense you're saying that have to do with this?
He had somehow taken care of me back then so I immediately felt guilty because i shouted at him. The only thing I couldn't accept was that he had destroyed my life and my personality in the process. My eyes filled with tears. Why does it still hurt so much?
We'll It's not like just one of us Probably. We're both your sons. It's not a secret anyway. I'm too well aware of that. But why are you bringing that up all of a sudden?
When the time comes I want you to listen to your uncle and treat him like a father! Does this my father mean? When the time comes?. I wonder if he meant when my uncle requests it of him
You're mistaken Blaire not both of you.
Although there's no way of knowing if my father accepted this I'm not going to argue against it. And if my brother were here I'm certain he probably do the same thing
Alright uncle Arthur unfortunately my brother is not really here. But if you'd like I'll tell to my beloved brother to give you a call when he returns
What? We don't have to look for someone who's not here Blaire it's you all i need. he chuckled what's so funny?
My brother will be shocked I'm certain. When he come back to find that he has a new father or maybe. He won't be surprised at all I don't remember if I've ever seen him look surprised. "He's always serious he only has one expression in his face
Big brother are you going somewhere?" Are you hiding something from me?. These past few days. "You've been disappearing all the time
Always remember this my dear sister life is no fun when you live with nothing but good luck for so long. I need to suffer through some bad luck myself to appreciate the good times even more. It's through facing challenges that we often find our true strength and resilience
Would you really choose that over me? "Is that even possible?.. Five months ago when my brother left he's leaving behind nothing but a few unsure words.
I need to suffer through some bad luck myself. What does he mean by that?..Did the earthquake shake my brother's head that day? Why has he always said those nonsense? "I was brought back to reality when uncle spoke.
Starting today you need to call me as your father from now on you're my son!. Haa? I want to tweak myself. I don't know if I'm feeling joy or pain.
Alright then whatever I can be your son Instead of being your daughter
From this day on. I give you permission to live your life as my daughter or my son. It's fine with me. As long as your happy. In exchange call me father
I covered my mouth with my hand as my sobs slowly came out. Is this true? That i can now leave the curse I've been keeping to myself for so long
Ever since i was a child I've always wondered why. I had to live as a boy when i could have been a girl. Starting when i was in third grade. I had to live according to my father's rules. This question lingered in my mind. shaping my identity and the choices I made. As i grew older i began to explore what it truly meant to embrace my authentic self. seeking understanding and acceptance in a world that often felt unwelcoming
Nathan and I had to live as if we were both gender that's what my dad always told us when he was still alive. Our lives would be in danger if anyone found out I was a girl so from then on I lived as a boy not a girl just to protect my brother.
Come to think of it. why do you suddenly need a son?" It's so impossible that there is no replacement. "Where are you trying to take me?! I can sense that he trying to trick me again
The director of our organization is going to join the Headquarters in the U.S. You can use a gun so I thought of you. What I'm trying to say they need a companion. There are power struggles no matter where you go. And your experience is more suitable for this job.
I have to help one of them who is my direct superior fill the director's vacated seat in six months. What i'm saying is there's going to be a huge internal battle within my organization in immediately future
And i need someone to be in the middle of the battlefield and survive. You're not trying to send me to the frontline. are you?
Can't i just not go there?" My luck is always pretty unimpressive. Oh come on fulfill your filial duty to me my son nor my daughter
Can't i just be a bad son nor daughter then? Don't be ungrateful brat. After I helped you get discharged from the military. You're sitting here talking about shirking your filial duties?
I didn't say anything to put me in the military maybe you forgot you were the one who insisted. You don't know what hardships I went through there. Perhaps if you had experienced even a fraction of what I did you might understand why I feel this way It's not about shirking responsibilities. It's about reclaiming my own life after all that I've faced."
I was curious as to why I was discharged when I still had time to serve. So I was released from that hell because you were behind it?
Did you really help me?! For what reason why?.. I'm sure he'll do something even worse than the devil... "I really can't read this man now he's claimed that he's my father I can't believe I'm able to talk to him
This definitely seems like a problem I wouldn't want to get sucked into involved. He knows exactly how to control anyone around him. He makes sure you can't refuse This is dangerous. He referred to it as a power struggle and it works
I'm certain it's not much different from the military the moment he mentioned that organization. I don't even want to look in that direction again. I'm not sure what awaits me there. Which is terrifying
You're already aware of this didn't you? You know I haven't held a gun in a long time. what if I can't?
Then give me one good reason why you can't do it. If it's reasonable I'll look for someone else!. Daddy i know you know my reason. from the very beginning you already knew. don't pretend like a mystery
I know this is too much I'm sorry. I know your brother is intelligent but it's undeniable that you're more strategic than him in everything. You're the only one I can trust other than myself.
What exactly is he thinking? What is he after from me? Like he said earlier, he can just find someone else. It's not as if there are people like me all over the place. What if my work there is sloppy? Can you be responsible for the consequences?. Yet, I can't shake the feeling that there's something unique about him, something he might not find again so easily. Maybe he just needs time to realize that.
Do i need to remind you that i don't want to be in the military? I've already spent enough time in that kind of hell and closed environment
We're not the military. as I've already stated. we just place a lot of emphasis on physical fitness. However, our hierarchy and culture are completely different from those of the army. Since we are not breaking any laws don't assume that we are a syndicate. Since we handle private cases. you could consider it closed, but it's not authorisian.
There is no difference depending on which organization you are referring to. I may not need to visit the hospital on a regular basis. But my knees continue to ache, and my body feels still when it rains!. Also, how can i get in there without them noticing I'm a woman? I've gotten through this before but i can't promise i can do it now.
There's nobody there who isn't like that. Everyone has taken a few bullets and broken several bones, anything else?. Regarding your gender. Simply do what you can do. Make sure. They will not find out about it. Do not worry about the others. I guarantee they won't notice you. just do what you're used to naturally.
I'm sorry i don't meet your requirements I'm not particularly lucky or talented. What can a scoundrel like me do there. His gaze seemed to pierce the wall. "Why are you lookingat me like that?.. I puzzled
All i need is someone who will do their job well and stick it out there for a while. I think very highly of you. You see. Do you think I'll perform my job well?
I looked at All your recent records including the one from When you attended the military academy for reference. Even when you were just a child back then. I saw potential in you. Your talent is different, Blaire. You are unique to everyone, even your brother, who is smart is you can surpass him. Not in physical strength, but in skill, he won't beat you.
Don't let our enemies catch you, If they catch you, it's not my responsibility anymore, so take care of yourself. That's the only way you can survive.