Chapter 14 — Monday Night Football (Spoilers, Schemes & Scherbatsky Mischief)
Ted Mosby believed spoilers ruined everything.
Barney Stinson believed spoilers were just foreplay.
And Ivar Scherbatsky? He believed spoilers were weapons — and he was happy to use them.
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The Pact
At MacLaren's, Ted laid out the plan.
"Okay, we all DVR the game and watch it together tonight. No one checks the score, no one reads the news, no one cheats. Deal?"
Marshall: "Deal."
Lily: "Deal."
Robin: "Deal."
Barney: "I'll try."
Everyone turned to Ivar.
He smirked. "Correction: I already watched it."
The gang gasped.
"You WHAT?!" Ted shouted.
Megan, sipping her drink, added: "At Northern Star HQ. Giant screen. Catered wings. It was glorious."
Yvonne grinned. "We even rewound the halftime show three times."
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The Mind Games
All day, Ivar toyed with them:
To Marshall: "Don't get too attached to the kicker."
To Ted: "Man, what a heartbreak ending."
To Robin: "Best Canadian commercial of all time."
To Barney: "You're going to love the cheerleader with the hat."
Each comment sent them spiraling.
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Spoiler Panic
The gang scrambled through the city:
Ted wore noise-canceling headphones on the subway.
Robin ducked behind newspaper stands.
Marshall nearly tackled a guy shouting scores on the street.
Barney kept bribing strangers: "Tell me who won. I'll give you fifty bucks."
Ivar? He strolled behind them, calm, sipping coffee, enjoying the chaos.
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Megan & Yvonne's Tag Team
Megan teased Robin. "You're sweating more than a hockey goalie in overtime."
Yvonne grinned at Barney. "Correction: this is the most pathetic I've ever seen you."
"Unfair!" Barney cried. "You three already know!"
Megan smirked. "That's because we're smarter."
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The Viewing
Finally, they all sat down that night to watch the game together.
The tension was unbearable — everyone bracing for disaster.
Then the ending played.
Marshall blinked. "Wait. That's it? That wasn't heartbreaking at all."
Ted frowned. "You made it sound tragic!"
Robin gasped. "There wasn't even a Canadian commercial!"
Barney groaned. "Where's the hat girl?!"
Ivar leaned back, smirking. "Correction: I never spoiled anything. You spoiled it yourselves by assuming I did."
Megan high-fived him.
Yvonne smirked. "Masterclass."
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Closing Beat
By the end of the night:
Ted sulked about being "emotionally manipulated."
Marshall admitted the stress almost killed him.
Robin swore revenge.
Barney still hunted for "hat girl."
Megan and Yvonne toasted Ivar's genius.
And Ivar? He enjoyed his whiskey, calm as ever.
Because sometimes the best play wasn't the game.
It was playing the players.
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End of Chapter 14.
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👉 Next is Chapter 15 ("Lucky Penny") — the "fate" episode where Ted misses his flight because of a chain of small events. Do you want me to keep that arc intact, but with Ivar reframing it with his "choices over fate" philosophy?