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What do you do when you have strength that no one else can match?
You could fight for power, carve out territory, build something permanent. Or you could spend your life chasing what the strength actually wants — wine, recognition, the particular satisfaction of a battlefield that asks everything of you and still finds you standing.
Lü Bu had always known which one he was.
His entire life was a string of choices that other people called betrayal and he called clarity. He knew what he wanted. He went after it. He never made promises he intended to keep and then broke them quietly — he simply didn't make promises. Maybe that made him a villain in retrospect. He could live with that. The one thing he couldn't quite settle was a single face, a single unresolved moment, that had followed him all the way into this summoning.
That was why he'd answered the Holy Grail's call.
Whether that person would blame him or praise him when he finally made his wish — he genuinely didn't know. Standing on the tower earlier, looking at the starless flood-washed sky, the corner of his mouth had curved upward beneath the mask.
Enough thinking. Right now, there was a battlefield. Right now, there was a man with a Gatling gun and thirty thousand robots staring at him with the specific expression of someone who had decided to die interestingly.
Lü Bu raised the Fangtian Halberd and pointed it at Wei.
The windless night produced a gust anyway — lifting his cape, catching the light on the twin ornaments in his hair, making the whole scene considerably more dramatic than it needed to be.
"I am General Lü Bu! You nobodies — why haven't you knelt yet?!"
[Chat]: HE SAID IT
[Chat]: IS THIS STILL THE LÜ BU I KNOW?? THIS IS TOO COOL
[Confusion]: wait, why can his bow turn into a halberd? what kind of tech tree is this?
[Lore]: God Force. six weapon configurations. bow is one form. halberd is another. Archer class just means he started in ranged mode.
[Little_Cat_Chat]: Little Cat, stop staring at Lü Bu with those eyes while wearing Emiya Kiritsugu's face. I cannot handle this.
[Also_Chat]: Lü Bu is visibly uncomfortable. little cat PLEASE.
[Betting]: I have thirty platform coins left. I'm putting it all on Little Cat's team. all in.
[Counter_Bet]: I'm betting on Wei. thirty thousand robots. he has to get overwhelmed eventually.
Wei looked at the halberd pointed at his face, felt his bladder register a mild complaint, and decided that the weight of the Gatling gun in his hands was louder.
He pulled the trigger.
"You want some?! Taste this! TOMATO COMBO! Tomato and eggs! Tomato beef! Tomato pork! Tomato chicken! Chicken breast, chicken offal, chicken skin, beef tongue—"
The Gatling gun spun up to 6,000 rounds per minute. Bullets filled the space between them like a solid wall.
[Chat]: TOMATO COMBO
[Chat]: he's listing every tomato dish he knows
[Chat]: WEI IS LOSING HIS MIND
Lü Bu began spinning the Fangtian Halberd in one hand.
The bullets — all of them, every round of the sustained burst — deflected off the rotating halberd like rain off a spinning umbrella. Not blocked by brute endurance. Actually redirected, the centrifugal force of the spin throwing each bullet away from its trajectory before it could land.
Wei's voice got louder with each dish he named. His expression was transitioning from terror into something that looked dangerously like genuine excitement. The Gatling gun kept firing.
Lü Bu stopped spinning.
Gripped the halberd handle with both hands and swept it at Wei's head.
"Die."
Edison's large hand caught Wei by the collar and yanked him backward.
Wei's feet left the ground. The halberd passed through the space where his head had been.
The strike hit the ground instead.
A chasm opened in the concrete — tens of yards deep, edges clean as a blade cut, spreading outward like the earth had simply decided to split.
[Chat]: NO
[Chat]: WHAT
[Chat]: THAT'S THE GROUND. THAT'S WHAT IT DID TO THE GROUND.
[Chat]: I said he couldn't beat thirty thousand robots. I was wrong. I was completely wrong. I am eating all of it.
[Lore_Drop]: for context: A-rank stats means "capable of destroying a small country." Lü Bu's strength stat is A. this is the ground having a rough night.
[Wei_Chat]: I'm not going to pretend I didn't almost wet myself. I'm not going to pretend.
Edison, still holding Wei by the collar, assessed the situation with the calm of a man recalculating his strategy. The elite mechanical soldiers around them — titanium alloy construction, each comparable to a low-tier Servant in raw capability — had been moving to flank Lü Bu. Lü Bu swept his halberd horizontally without looking at them. They came apart at the waist. Mechanical circuits sparked in the dark.
The smile on Edison's lion face had gone somewhere more serious.
Thirty thousand was apparently not the number.
He set Wei down, took half a step back, and started thinking about his Noble Phantasm.
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