Why do you make me feel like I'm vulnerable?" Kaida wipes her eyes as she looks at her parents' stern expression towards her.
"Sweetie, we don't mean to make you feel that way. We want the best for you." Her grey haired father answers.
"Don't say that dad. Your title in the church has made you want to change my life all for your praise. I have a life dad. You have to listen to me too." She faces her mum.
"We want to help you improve great things about you. The potential in you is applaudable." Her mother -Mrs Abigail answers coldly.
She clenches her fist hard on the desk. "I'm not having this conversation with you guys again. I can't and will never be a nun."
With that she stands halfway to the door beside the window.
"Kaida," Mr. Atticus,her father calls, removing his glasses and pinching the bridge of his nose, "you can't go on like this."
She stands by the window, crossing both arms tightly. "Like what?"
" Unfocused. There's nothing life has to offer out there "
His voice softens, but there was an edge she couldn't ignore. "St. Veora was willing to take you last year. You should have accepted their offer."
Kaida clenches her jaw. "I'm not a nun. I'm not meant for a convent."
"It isn't a punishment," he insisted. "They help people with… unresolved temptations. Confusion."
Her eyes flashes. "So now I'm confused?"
Her father didn't flinch, but his expression cracks with quiet worry,the kind only a parent who knows their child is slipping away can show.
She continues anyway, "I have a boyfriend I love. You know him. Aiden."
"He doesn't love you." he hesitates.
"I'll be the judge of that." She says sternly,opening the door.
Kaida leaves her home and heads to see her boyfriend Aiden at his apartment.
When she arrives at his place,she hesitates to tell him anything.
He comes out from the bathroom,dripping wet all over.
"Babe," she murmurs cutely,not looking at him but his masculine body.
She sits on his desk, waiting for him.
"morning" she smiles, greeting him.
He playfully fonds her chin,and plants a soft kiss on her lips. " Hope you slept well."
"Yes,I did"
He comes closer, traces his hands round her thigh, slowly.
He tries to loosen her racerblack blouse,but she stops him halfway.
"There's something I have to tell you."
He stops. " Really. Alright,fill me in."
She tells him about her acceptance into the convent.
His face turns pale, he wasn't happy. She knows he won't be.
" Woow, ehm. ok." That was not from his heart.
"Just ok." she says, trying to clear the silence.
"What should I say?" He asked,this time bending his head,while rubbing them.
"We are together. What about us?But don't get me wrong."
"I know that you won't want me to go. And I don't too, so I've decided to leave it." she tells him.
"It's Christmas,we should be bothered by other things not this" he says, nonchalantly.
"Phew,I caused this." she told herself.
The next morning,Aiden heads to her house straight to her room.
With a ring.
Just wow.
All because of that….
"I've been thinking. I want us to make this official. Let's do this together." He said, while they sat.
She just looked at him, didn't know how to respond or what to say.
"You're not saying anything?." He asks,holding her wrists. " I love you."
"Yes. That's the problem." she replies.
" I don't understand, what do you mean by that's the problem. Don't you love me or your feelings changed because of that thing you told me yesterday?" He asked,not smiling at all.
" Aiden" she calls, pulling closer.
"You brought this,cause of yesterday?,That's the problem."
" Cause I don't want to lose you. I don't want to feel like I don't have you in my life."
"No, you want to tie me down. I've loved you for years, Aiden. Never did you remember to put a ring there,this comes and you….."
" You don't…."
She cuts. " I'll think about it."
She got to meet her parents- her dad and mum.
They advised her to disapprove of the marriage.
"He'll do more harm than good to you Kaida. Choose the best part, you'll thank us later" Kaida's father says.
And for the next few days. He begin acting like the man she wished him to be. Buying her food,sending money gifts.
Calling,when at work.
Even praying with her.
A man she hasn't seen praying,is now praying.
Everything felt forced.
Until one fateful Sunday, she went out to get some groceries.
While walking down the street,she saw Aiden with another woman.
She's seen the lady a few times in his phones, says their related.
She didn't ask then.
But now.
Curiosity grew within her,she stops and looks from afar. They were buying street food.
They were laughing.
Then he kissed her cheek.
She didn't confront him.
She simply follows.
They walk into a small estate nearby,holding his hand like she owns him.
Then she notices a baby bump.
In minutes,she was standing in front of a hospital.
Maybe the lady came for a check up.
She still followed.
Calmly,not to arouse suspicion.
She goes to the receptionist.
" Please, I'm looking for someone. A lady with a bump that just passed by,and a tall hairy guy,beige eyes?." She asks.
"Room 45" she says not looking at her.
She quickly hurries, tracking the number from door to door.
She didn't find it in the first storey building,she runs to the second,third.
Nothing.
She didn't want to use the elevator to avoid seeing them.
She tiredly walks to the third stairs,one step at a time.
Panting.
She passed the first door 41, the second 42 ,the third 43, the fourth 44 and then she found it.
Room 45.
"Are you looking for something?" A female nurse asked.
" No,I just want to go in." she answers frightenly.
She looks at her for a while,then headed down.
She tries to open the door,but she couldn't.
She hits her fist hard on the wall,not to intentionally make a noise.
Apparently, they heard one,some footsteps approachs to open the door,it could be Aiden.
She quickly hid beside the corridor.
He checks,then he closes the door.
She decides to leave,for good.
To start afresh.
She calls his sister. Mariam.
Tells her everything she saw.
She confesses.
" You were just his backup plan. That's his wife." she ends the call, throwing her phone on the bed and fucking cries.
In minutes,he texts her:You didn't even say goodbye.
He knows she was there,at the hospital.
She replies fast,tears dropping on her phone: "You watched me suffer for years and you cheated on me!
Or no you didn't, you were married.
Goodbye is too expensive to waste on a married man."
After that,
Blocked.
Gone for good.