It was my first day of college, and I was very nervous. I had no friends and didn't know how to talk to new people or make friends.
A day before college started, I even went on YouTube and watched videos about how to make friends, hoping it would help me feel confident.
Still, on the first day, I ended up being late.
Standing outside the classroom door, I took a deep breath and said, "May I come in, ma'am?"
She looked at me and said yes. I walked inside slowly. Every face in the classroom was new, and I suddenly felt very small and uncomfortable. I quietly went and sat alone behind a girl.
After a few minutes, I gathered some courage and asked her name. She asked mine too, very formally, almost like she had also watched the same YouTube video about making friends.
Her name was Priyanka. She asked me everything — my school, my junior college, and where I lived. Because of that, I also spoke formally, trying my best to sound confident even though I was nervous inside.
Honestly, I didn't find anyone in college I wanted to date. I had imagined college differently — I thought there would be handsome, cute, and tall boys everywhere, but there was no one like that. Everything felt normal and ordinary.
My days became simple. I attended lectures quietly and went home without talking much to anyone. Out of 32 students, I made only two friends. I wasn't good at starting conversations. If someone came and talked to me, I could reply, but I never knew how to begin talking first.
One day, I was again late for my first lecture. That day a new staff member had joined the college. As I hurried through the corridor, he suddenly walked past me. For a moment, we made eye contact.
It felt as if time stopped.
I didn't know why, but I couldn't look away. I was just looking at him, and he was looking at me. My heartbeat became faster, and everything around me faded for a few seconds. Then we both continued walking — he toward his work and I toward my class — but something felt different inside me.
I couldn't understand what was happening.
He was tall, dark, and handsome, and that unexpected moment stayed in my mind the entire day.
I sat on my bench, opened my notebook, and pretended to focus on the lecture, but honestly, I wasn't listening at all. My thoughts were somewhere else.
I kept asking myself, Who was he? A student? A senior? Or maybe a new teacher? I didn't even know his name, yet that small moment felt unforgettable.
During the break, Priyanka turned toward me and asked, "Why are you smiling alone?"
I quickly replied, "Nothing… just thinking about something."
She looked at me suspiciously and laughed. "First day itself and already secrets?"
I smiled but didn't say anything. How could I explain something I didn't understand myself?
The rest of the day went normally. Lectures ended, students talked in groups, some were already making plans to hang out after college. I quietly packed my bag and started walking toward the gate. I still felt like an outsider, watching everyone else enjoy college life while I stayed in my own small world.
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