Before there was time, before there was man, before TikToks and taxes—there was Heaven.
A realm of peace. Glory. Divine harmony.
Until… someone got too lit with the praise.
Lucifer. The Morning Star. Choir leader, fashion icon, and certified celestial heartthrob. He was Heaven's golden boy. Literally. Wings polished. Halo tilted just right. The dude even had a glow-up before humans existed.
But he had a problem. He forgot who wrote the beat he was singing on.
And that's when the crash-out began.
Scene: Heaven's Great Hall
God sits on the throne—massive, radiant, but chillin'. He's got that calm, wise aura but the eyes of someone who knows how this is all going to go down.
Enter Lucifer, strutting into the Hall
with a full angel entourage behind him like he just won celestial Grammys.
Lucifer: "Big G. I've been thinking…
maybe it's time we remix the divine order."
God (raising one eyebrow): "Remix?"
Lucifer: "Yeah. I mean, look—I've been
carrying Heaven's playlist for eons. The angels only show up to my choir
nights. I was thinking… maybe a little co-throne action? You know—God x
Lucifer: Dual Kings Tour?"
Gabriel (in the back, whispering):
"This man really trying to co-op the Kingdom…"
Michael: "He's about to get smitten
with a capital S."
God: "Lucifer… my son. You're
talented. But don't forget—I made you."
Lucifer (smirking): "And I made Heaven
vibes. Without me, y'all up here humming Gregorian chants in monotone."
The angels gasp. A halo literally
falls off someone's head.
God (standing up slowly): "So you want
to lead now?"
Lucifer: "I don't just want to lead. I
want it all."
Boom.
In that moment, Heaven didn't just
tremble—it clapped back. A crack split the skies, and Michael drew his sword,
all dramatic-like, flipping it once just because it looked cool.
Michael (to Lucifer): "You sure you
want this smoke?"
Lucifer (grinning): "I invented
smoke."
Cue the celestial throwdown.
Lightning. Fire. Angels flying WWE
style. Michael pulls out moves like "Divine Dropkick" and "Holy Haymaker."
Lucifer dodging with anime-speed. Gabriel's in the back shouting "WORLDSTAR!"
And in the middle of it all, God just
sighs like a tired parent whose kids knocked over the divine coffee table
again.
Eventually, it's done. Lucifer's wings
are tattered, pride shattered, eyeliner somehow still perfect. God looks at him
one last time.
God: "You wanted the throne. You get
the fall." And then—boom—He kicks Lucifer out
with a divine boot. Literally.