20. "MEANT FOR ME" [Interlude]
We were born 9 days apart in a same month, her mother's name is the same as my mother's, so is their field of work. When we met, it was like a match made in heaven, I couldn't shake this feeling nor ignore it if I wanted to, it seemed like no matter how hard I tried, I would end up with that girl anyway because the universe kept creating room for her in my life.
I don't know if she's meant for me or not but what I know for certain is that I love her so much, I've never felt any stronger about somebody and she stays on my mind 24/7.
21. "GOOD OL' DAYS"
I miss the good old days, we used to stay on the call for hours and hours, just talking while she's doing her house chores, cooking and cleaning. I miss the way she'd wrap her arms around me, keep me warm and make sure that I'm just an inch away from her, I miss the good old days.
2023 was our year, right after we turned 20 years old, everything changed but since the moment she chose to step out of my life, I had this strong belief that we're meant to be anyway and everytime I would try to walk away, I'd have this aching feeling that said, "You're walking away from what's meant for you".
And most of the times when I would put in the effort, we would have some progress but now things have turned into strange things, it's like my best friend is no longer in there, or maybe it's just me all in my head.
I miss the good old days, I remember how she used to be universe, everything in my life would be all fucked up but as soon as I hear her voice, I would slip right into wellness and I still don't know how she had that affect on me.
I just want us back to where we were, like back in the good old days, when we would spend hours on the call, talk about her day before she went to sleep, these days all I get from her is dreams, dreams and dreams.
22. "COLD SHOULDER"
Today you've been heavy on my mind, tried sleeping it off but my thoughts of you were pretty loud to be silenced, so I came in here to write these thoughts I'm having. I look at us and how we are nowadays, it's like we're strangers, we hardly said 10 words to each other in the last 24 hours mama and we used to be best friends, sometimes we wouldn't get off the phone but look at us now.
I've been trying to break the ice but you keep getting colder, you're my best friend and I need you right now, a month ago, you were saying "What's wrong? Tell me all about it, tonight I've got all the time, talk to me", so what happened to that girl who always kept a safe space for me? I need her right now, not this cold shoulder that you've been giving me.
I know there's still a little bit of Ms. Curious in you, I know you still remember our bond and memories, I'm not saying we should stay in the past, we're here now but that doesn't mean we should grow apart.
You're probably choosing to not hear me but still here I am, willing to work us back up, I'm not saying be my lover, I just want you in my life and I wanna be there for you too, I know you be holding stuff inside with nobody to trust them with but you don't need to do that if I'm with you, so let me be your best friend again.
I'll check up on you every damn morning, I'll make time if you got something bothering you and I'll talk to you about whatever if you wanna forget about some things, I'll be there for you because you mean a lot to me.