I had a crush on him since 2017. He was my uncle's wife's nephew, three years older than me. That year, during a family vacation, we all went to her hometown. That was when I first saw him—and I fell for him at first glance.
We spent the vacation visiting places together, laughing, and enjoying every moment. I still remember one night vividly. On the bus ride back from a historical site, everyone changed seats freely. By luck, the seat beside mine was empty, and he sat down. As night fell, everyone around us drifted off to sleep. I was tired too, and when I leaned back, he quietly offered his shoulder for me to rest on. My heart skipped a beat. I knew he probably only saw me as a little sister, but still, the warmth of that moment stayed with me.
After returning to our city, I missed him terribly. But soon I heard that one of my cousins had started liking him. My heart sank, yet time moved forward. My family grew closer with his family, and I became friendly with them too. Especially with his cousin, Neel. He and I became almost like buddies, sharing laughs and secrets.
In 2018, during my younger uncle's wedding, both he and Neel came again. We grew closer, spent vacations together, hung out everywhere, and slowly my feelings deepened. I eventually told Neel about my crush, but he shocked me by revealing that my cousin, Mily, was already in a relationship with him. I thought she just had a crush, but it was real. I tried to control my feelings after that.
But with time, my bond with Neel grew stronger. We talked a lot, even though he already had a girlfriend. By 2020, I realized I felt something for him too. Every time he visited my city, I missed him terribly after he left. I told him that I feel this way, but he gently told me nothing could happen since we were cousins—even if not by blood. Still, he began treating me differently, making me feel like he liked me too.
But I noticed a strange pattern—when Neel was around, I felt something for him. I couldn'thelp but my brain thinks about him like crazy.But when he left, my feelings faded quickly. In contrast, whenever Tori came, no matter how much I tried to avoid him, my heart would betray me, pulling me toward him again and again.
I finally admitted this truth to Neel and decided to stop confusing myself.
Later, when Tori visited, all my cousins planned a trip to a resort outside the city. We left at night, taking a bus together. I noticed the seat beside him was empty. I wanted to sit there for the window seat, but Mily claimed it first. I said nothing.
That night, I kept avoiding his gaze, though I sometimes felt like he was looking at me. When the bus stopped for a break, everyone else got off. They asked me to come too, but I refused, saying I just wanted to rest. Slowly, one by one, they left the bus until I was the only one inside.
With my headphones on, I closed my eyes. A few minutes later, someone gently pulled off my headphones. Startled, I opened my eyes—he was right there, his face so close to mine. My heart pounded wildly. I tried to ask what was wrong, but before I could say a single word…
He leaned in and kissed me on my left cheek.