Working as a night-shift security guard and just sleeping all night is honestly the best job that I've ever had. I yawn, stretch and then take a look at my phone to see what time it is. 4:02 AM. I've still got some time left until my shift ends.
I go for a walk through the restaurant to get my tingling feet sorted. The restaurant is pretty successful, but they've had problems with thieves breaking in and stealing the wagyu beef. The more creative the owner got with hiding it the more creative the thieves got with finding it.
I hear a noise from the storeroom to my left. I turn my head and look there. The door is wide open and there's a costumed maniac rummaging through the freezer. He or she is wearing a literal freddy fazbear suit. We just stare at each other, unsure of what to do.
They are the one to break the stalemate. They reach behind their back and pull out a shotgun. "Please don-" A booming sound erupts. I look down and see my guts falling out of me onto the floor. I look ba-.
—
I stare at the giant white haired snake eyed lady. She stares back at me. I then shit myself and start crying.
—
Let's get the bad news out of the way first.
I've been reborn in warhammer 40k.
The good news is that I'm a navigator, so I'll be enjoying a life of decadent luxury until I turn into a goat/snake before dying and enjoying an eternity of suffering in the warp. Another silver lining is that the year is 38012, so I hopefully have less chances of dying horridly without the tyranids fucking about.
My new official name is Krouss of house Hircus. I'm currently being held in the furry arms of my father, Tamuriel.
My father has the head of a goat, furry arms and a furry chest. Otherwise he's a normal human, except for the hooved feet I guess. The fur honestly doesn't feel that bad, it's actually very soft and comfy. He apparently really hates wearing shirts because of the fur, thankfully he still wears pants. "Aghaghaghhhhaaa."
Tamuriel laughs, his voice surprisingly human despite the shape of his head. "Dear, our son just made another sound!"
My mother, Elena, just smiles at the two of us. She's got snake eyes and small patches of scales on her body. She looks remarkably human for a navigator.
I don't know what family my mother is from, but it's pretty clear that she's the one with the more stable genes in their marriage. I hope I inherit them.
—
I stare at my baby sister. She stares back at me. She then shits herself and starts crying. At least she's got my mother's eyes.
Mother coos at her. "Oh dear, isn't our darling Joline the cutest?"
—
I've reached ten years old, which means that it's time for me to start learning navigator space hell warp-fuckery magic.
My father, mother and I are in a large, well-lit empty room. There's a bound and blindfolded prisoner on a chair in the middle of the room.
Tamuriel pats my shoulder. "Don't worry son, all you need to do is look really hard at him with your third eye. Tell me how you see him while you do that, allright?"
I give him a nervous nod. "Allright."
Up until now I've been wearing something to cover and blind my third eye 24/7. Looking right into a hellscape is supposedly not good for a kid's mental health. Elena pats my other shoulder. "Don't worry son, most of it is instinctual and comes naturally."
I nod and remove the circlet covering my third eye. I calm down once I don't spontaneously turn into a plaguebearer. I look at the prisoner and give his soul a deep look.
He was born on this space station. He is a child born from a liaison between the head chef and a maid. He was named Jirco by his mother. He was trained to be a domestic servant for the family from a young age. He liked cooking. He started learning how to cook better food. He was swapped to the kitchens once his skill improved. He did not get promoted any further in the kitchens in his first year there. He slept with his supervisor, hoping to get a promotion. He did not get promoted any further in the kitchens in his second year there. He trained to become a better cook. He did not get promoted any further in the kitchens in his third year there. He slept with the new head chef. He did not get promoted any further in the kitchens in his fourth year there. He killed, cooked and served his supervisor as a dish to the head chef. He was imprisoned for the murder. He gets raped i- That's enough.
I blink. I look at my mother. "How much time has passed?"
Elena pats my head. "None. It felt like a lot of time had passed, didn't it?"
I nod. Tamuriel chuckles. "I will remove his blindfold now, don't do anything to him this time. Just look at what happens to him when he looks into your third eye."
Tamuriel walks over to the man, pulling off the man's blindfold once he is close to him. The man's eyes are closed. My father violently slams his fist into one of the man's fingers, making him open his eyes and scream.
His soul begins to crack the moment that he inadvertently glances at my third eye. The glance acted like a hammer, violently cracking his soul. Despite making sure not to look at my third eye anymore, the man's soul continues to slowly crack further. It takes two seconds since he glanced at my third eye for his soul to shatter.
The man's corpse sits on the chair, eyes bulging out and mouth frothing. My mother chuckles and ruffles my hair. "From now you will have to keep your third eye uncovered until your twentieth birthday, we'll teach you how to navigate ships using our personal ones until then. Don't worry, the servants in our quarters are all offspring from your fathers harem, they will not die from simply looking at your eye."
I nod absentmindedly. I just shattered a dude's soul.
—
I'm getting married to my sister tomorrow. The age gap between the two of us is about two years, so she's eleven and I'm thirteen right now. Atleast we're free to consummate the marriage at our own pace, so I'm not a fucking certified pedo just yet…
We're having dinner right now. My father is chowing down what looks like spinach while my mother is chowing down on boiled eggs. They are both jubilant and radiate that joy that parents do when their kids get married. My sister and I are both eating steak and eggs.
My sister turns to me and gives me a smile. "You now have to give me cuddles whenever I ask. Also, all the toys are mine now, a-"
I flick her forehead through her white hair and sigh. "You're saying that as if you're not the one hoarding all the toys."
She rubs her forehead and cries out. "MOOOOOM, Krouss is being mean again!"
Our mother just smiles at the two of us. "Ah, I remember when your father and I got married, it was the best day of our entire life."
Our father talks while chewing the spinach. "We were both so young back then de-."
My sister jumps from her seat and interrupts them. "How did you meet? You always cha-"
I quickly give my sister a wet willy to distract her. There's some things that don't really add up when it comes to our parents.
House Hircus is on the bottom of the rung when it comes to the social hierarchy of the navis nobilite. Father is only thirty four, and he is already horribly mutated while mother is still free of any large mutations in her early forties, something that could only happen to a navigator from a prestigious house. There's also the fact that I don't know which house she is from, with her changing the subject each time that I ask.
There's almost no way they got married legitimately, since whatever my mother's house is they wouldn't mingle with a low rung house like us. My sister and I are both also remarkably stable by navigator standards. The only mutation that I've got are the two horns slowly growing out of my forehead, while my sister's only got snake eyes.
The most suspicious thing is that we've lived our whole lives in a space station. We do go out with our families personal ships to get trained as navigators, but we're never far away from the space station.
I have a theory on what it is that they are hiding, and It's almost certainly less that they're hiding a secret from us and more that they're keeping a secret until we're old enough not to babble. Or at least I hope so, it'd suck to get turned into a bloodthirsters chewtoy.
My sister gets up and lunges ferociously at me, straddling me once she's pushed me off the chair and onto the ground. "Tickle Fight!"
Our parents don't even bother interrupting our playfight, they're lost in their own little world. In the end I win the tickle fight once I get a hold of the soles of her feet, her greatest weak point.
—
My sister and I's marriage ceremony gives me the last piece of evidence that I need to realise what exactly it is that our parents are hiding. Our parents eloped, ran away and are currently living their life while hiding from either both of their families, or only my mothers family.
There are no navis nobilite, or any other form of similarly ranking imperial noble, guests. The most important guest that we got was an envoy from a nearby space marine chapter who, coincidentally, also ended up giving us the most expensive gift, a pair of archeotech las pistols.
We're currently all in a large hall. There are dining tables set up on one third of the hall, with the final two thirds being a sort of mingling area, with tables set up in the middle for refreshments.
My sister and I are currently getting married at the end of the Hall, on the side of the mingling area. Our parents are right behind us. I'm wearing a somewhat more formal suit and a circlet to cover my third eye. I try to subtly look at my sister, who is fidgeting nervously in her somewhat more formal dress and identical circlet.
Our father puts his hands on each of our shoulders. "I declare you to be husband and wife, now let's go mingle."
He then just goes to the crowd of guests and begins to do just that. I blink. Is that it?
My sister grabs my hand and begins dragging me with her to the space marine before I can fully process everything.
By the time that I come back to my senses we're already right next to the eight foot tall murder giant. She begins to pull on the man's sleeve. "Mister, how do we use the guns you gave us?"
The space marine chuckles. "Like this."
He pulls out his own las pistol, an identical copy of ours, and pulls the trigger, shooting a nearby servitor in the chest. The shot goes clean through, melts right through the first wall it hits and only stops when hitting the second wall, on which it left a large charred mark.
The space marine re-holsters the las pistol. "That was the minimum setting, the maximum is the equivalent of a melta gun. It's got practically unlimited ammo, but you can only fire it so much with higher power before the safety kicks in."
—
It took me a while to realise that there's something different in my brand of warp-fuckery. I didn't realise it at first, since I just assumed that what I did was the standard. Only after my sister started her own training did I realise anything was off.
Her abilities are more… limited, for a lack of a better word. Where I can willingly stop at any point when looking through someone's soul, she can't, she has to look through the whole thing. I have more control over my powers, asking our parents about this reveals that it is something fairly unusual.
I don't think that they're hiding anything in this aspect. When they want to hide something they usually just change the subject since they can't lie for shit.
Now that we're aware of it we're testing it out. All of us are in the same room that my training began in, each of us with their third eye uncovered. I look at the three bound women in front of me.
The first on the list is the woman on the right, whose body and soul I proceed to set on fire with my third eye. Her screams are swiftly muffled by her vocal cords melting. I look at my mother who gives me a nod. "That is the usual, Immolate the Soul will set both the target's soul and body on fire."
The second on the list is the woman in the middle, whose body I set on fire, taking care not to set the soul on fire as well. Her screams take a bit longer, lasting until her soul is gone. I look at my mother. She takes a deep breath. "That is confirmation that there is something unusual with you. Our powers are diverse but limited in scope, something that slows down time cannot be used to speed it up, for example."
My father ruffles my hair. "Do the last test, if you can limit the scope of Immolate the Soul to just her body that would confirm this not being some form of coincidence or fluke."
I nod and turn to the last woman, setting just her body on fire. She lives much longer than the last two, only dying once her blindfold is destroyed and she gazes into my sister's third eye.
My dad sighs. "Since the two of you now already have this secret to keep, I guess your mother and I should tell you our own secrets now."
I look him in the eyes. "That the two of you eloped and are hiding away from your families?"
Mom shakes her head. "I ran away from my family, the house of Coluber, to marry your father. In the process I also stole some of their archeotech relics and their chart."
I stare at mom. "Like, a copy or-"
She shakes her head again. "The original."
My sister and I just stare at them. My father chuckles. "If they still had it they would've been able to scout us out long ago, this location is effectively a blindspot without a proper chart."
I take a deep breath. "And house Hircus is our actual house or just a front?"
Dad ruffles my hair. "It's our actual name. Most of our family dies early from disease. By the time that I married your mother I was already the last living member of our house."
Joline raises her hand. "Are they going to kill us?"
Dad sighs. "If they knew about us, then yes. Your mother is an expert diviner, so we have our ways of knowing whether or not we are compromised. If that ever comes to happen we have countermeasures in place."
I sigh. "That means that we won't be going out on any ship does it?"
Mom shakes her head. "Once you reach twenty years of age we will send the two of you out with the imperial guard. Don't worry, their ships are heavily escorted and rarely see much combat."
That's about five years down the line, hopefully that's more than enough time for us to not suck.
—
Ever since Joline and I got married six years ago we've been given a shared room. She has dragged me by force with her to stay, play and sleep with her in the room ever since.
The good news is that with premium technology comes premium gaming, so we're playing the equivalent of holographic tabletop AI generated DnD.
I drink from my glass of wine, perks of there being no minimum drinking age. My sister frowns and gives me an upset look. "Are you gay?"
I sputter, spit out the wine and begin coughing. "Wha- What t- the fuck?"
She begins tapping her foot. "Mom told me to ask you. You haven't taken any concubines or done anything with me."
I cough one last time and take a deep breath. "I- You- No, I'm not gay."
She gets more upset. "Does that mean that I'm ugly?"
"No, you-" Fuck it, I give up. I take her hand and start taking her to the bedroom. Once Joline realises our destination she's the one dragging me instead.
—
I look at the piles of luggage being loaded right into the navigator's quarters. "Do we really need all of this?"
My sister snorts. "No duh, we need at least ten thousand sets of clothes each. Do you want to embarrass the family name?"
Mom smiles. "How fast the two of you have grown, I wish that I could be with you to see our grand-children be born."
Joline blushes. "Moooooooom."
I chuckle. "Not so funny when it's the other way around is it?"
Dad ruffles the hair of both my sister and I. "Make sure to take care of your sister Krouss, there's something I need to give you now that you're going away."
I turn to him "What i-" He wordlessly hands me a small steel nub. I hold it between my fingers and give it a close look. It's got a port that looks like it's supposed to interface with our cybernetics on one side, the other side is just a small steel nub.
Dad points at the steel nub. "That's an archeotech relic of our house. It serves as a wireless bridge between you and the ship, allowing you to act as its navigator from anywhere inside it."
I insert it in the port on my back immediately, I don't want to risk losing this thing. My sister and I both give our parents hugs and leave for the navigators quarters to get started on interfacing with the ship.
—
I look at Joline. "Do you wanna do moms or dads communion ritual?" Please choose moms.
She shudders. "Moms, definitely moms. Dads ritual is too splattery for me."
I sigh in relief and take the vox from the maid next to me. "We require ten unmutated virgin girls, ten identical venomous snakes and ten matching antidotes for the communion ritual."
It doesn't take long for what we requested to arrive. Joline and I look at the girls, checking if they have any visible mutations. The ritual works better the less mutated they are.
After making sure that they have no mutations we begin the first stage of the ritual. I take a deep breath. "You will drink our blood, be bitten by the snakes and then you will eat the snakes whilst they are alive. You will then be given the antidote to the snake's venom. You will live the rest of your lives with us afterwards, understood?"
They immediately nod, fear visible on their faces. I give a nod to the maid next to me. The girls are handed a small glass of both my sister and I's blood, drinking it with some hesitation.
Servants guide the snake's bites with experienced hands, making sure that each bite is right on the left nape of the girls.
This part is going to be the most difficult, we can't starve them or give them something to make them hungry enough to eat the snakes, as that can affect the result of the ritual.
Thankfully they all manage to eat the snakes, one of them simply swallowing the whole snake alive. After they're all done eating we can finally begin the first part of the communion ritual.
My sister and I both cut our wrists, letting the blood pool and join on the floor. We begin chanting. "Sanguine nostro coniuncto."
The blood begins ominously glowing green.
"Sanguis noster videt"
The girls begin ominously glowing green.
"Mare nobis divitur"
Joline and I begin ominously glowing green.
"Et tuto navigabimus."
The glowing begins to slowly subside, until it is almost entirely gone. The only thing still glowing are the girls, who are now glowing an extremely light green, almost lightly enough to be missed if you didn't know to look for it.
The next time we do the ritual we only need to do the incantation, the snake eating was thankfully a one time thing.