The forest was quiet — too quiet.
Keika trudged through the undergrowth with the defeated gait of a salaryman whose life had just collapsed again. The moonlight spilled through the branches, painting him in silver gloom.
"What am I even doing now…"
He let out a miserable groan, dragging his feet over the dirt path.
"Jouzo's probably enjoying a warm fluffy bed somewhere right now… eating something expensive… while I'm out here, playing survival horror in the middle of an isekai forest. Fantastic."
Leaves rustled. An owl hooted. Something scuttled behind him.
"I really shouldn't have used random teleport. What if I landed in a volcano next time? Or a dungeon? Or—ugh—what if I get stuck in someone's bathroom?"
His imagination began working overtime, each scenario more ridiculous and horrifying than the last.
Keika's face went pale.
"...I'm going to die because of my own stupidity, aren't I?"
And that's when he saw it.
A massive, white shadow moved between the trees — sleek, graceful, and terrifyingly large.
"Uwaaa… that's a big cat."
His voice came out as a whisper, strangled between awe and despair. The creature stepped into the moonlight, revealing itself to be… a white tiger. Or maybe a lion? Keika didn't know. All he knew was big, fluffy, and apex predator.
He froze. Not a muscle moved. Even breathing felt like it might trigger death.
Okay, okay, stay calm. Just back away slowly. Quietly. Don't make a sound. Don't—
CRACK!
A dry branch snapped behind him.
Keika's blood ran cold.
He turned around in slow motion — like a man accepting his fate — and met another pair of glowing red eyes. This one was even closer.
"I'm going to die today…"
Sweat rolled down his temple. His body refused to move. Then, without warning—
THUD!
The big cat lunged. Keika squeezed his eyes shut, bracing for the kind of pain that ends a man's story.
But…
"Eh?"
Instead of agony, he felt something tugging on his shirt. The beast had bitten his collar — and with shocking gentleness, flung him toward a group of equally large, equally fluffy white tigers lounging nearby.
Keika landed with a thud, surrounded on all sides by majestic predators.
"Y-you're gonna… share me… with the others?"
His voice cracked. His vision blurred. His soul prepared to depart.
But then—
A tiny white cub bounced onto his chest and started licking his face.
"Wait, what—AHH, STOP, THAT TICKLES—!"
TING!
A crisp notification sound rang through the forest.
Keika blinked. A floating blue window appeared before his eyes.
[CONGRATULATIONS, HOST! HAREM OF WHITE HEAVENLY TIGERS HAS BEEN ACHIEVED!]
"…Huh?"
He stared blankly at the glowing text. Then his brain connected the dots.
"Wait—my skill… Harem of All Kind… ahh, no way… So that means the King too…? EHHHHH!? NOOOOOOO!!"
His scream echoed through the forest, startling every creature in the vicinity. The entire tiger pack jumped back several paces, alarmed.
Then, another message appeared.
[Your Majesty, we humbly apologize for our rude behavior.]
"Eh? W-wait a second, what was that?!" Keika's eyes darted left and right.
[You… can understand me?]
"You're… talking to me?!"
He pointed a trembling finger at the largest tiger — a regal, white-furred beast with eyes like rubies. The tiger nodded solemnly.
Keika let out a shaky laugh.
"Haha… yeah, this is definitely a dream. I'm just hallucinating from stress, right? Haha… ha—"
And then he collapsed.
Just… fainted on the spot.
The tigers panicked immediately.
[My King!][Leader, what happened to our King?!][Did we suffocate him?!][Is he still breathing?!][He's the Demon King, right? Can he even die?!]
The great beasts huddled in confusion around Keika's limp form, tails swishing in collective anxiety.
And so, under the pale moonlight, the man who had once managed drunken host club clients now found himself crowned—unwillingly—as the King of the White Heavenly Tigers.
Somewhere, the universe was laughing.