The night has come again. Since that cursed day, my life, nights infact everything about me has been unbearable. I laid on my bed knowing that one more time, the night will be long. After finding some rest, those horrible images came once more hunting me .
Shouts
'' NO!!! don't touch me ... please I beg you, I'll do anything other thing you want but please don't do this to me '' the girl cried helplessly .
'' Of cause . I want you to just give up don't worry my sweet you will love everything I'll do to you'' he said those disgusting words to her.
An forcefully had his way with her crying out of pain . Feeling helpless and soiled she had no other choice than to bare with it while praying for someone to come to her aid but the help never came. when he was done, he left the girl in a very poor state.
with blood on her legs and the pain she felt, she couldn't say anything other than crying . Before leaving the room, he threatened her saying that, '' if you let anyone know what transpired here, I'll kill you and your mother .''
The pain and helplessness she felt, made her loose hope in everything.
I woke up breathing heavily. that dream again I thought. I left my bed with dull features just as if I didn't want to live any more . leaving for the bathroom to prepare for work, there was no joy in me . The light that has been in my eyes disappeared a long time ago. After brushing my teeth and bathing, i went back to my room and dressed simply and tied my afro hairs in a bun . No makeup and jewelry because I hate them so much. What is the need of showing off my beauty when it's useless . With my kaba (a gown made of African wax tissue) and low sandals on , I took my bag and left for the dinning room.
My mother seeing me dressed like that felt desperate and started complaining once more.
'' Lana what's wrong with you? What is it with you and these kabas? aren't you tired of these? your whole wardrobe is made up of these dresses . Don't you want to get married ? '' she asked. Some minutes later, my mother's gaze soften and she told me . ''my sweet girl I Know it's difficult for you to turn the page but you need to take care of yourself . You are a beautiful woman in every aspect but you keep neglecting yourself. You have bloomed enough to get married and I am sure many men out there want to get you as their wife. Lana .... Let go of the past an move on please.'' she told me.
I told my mom that i am not beautiful and I don't think I'll ever need a man in my life before going towards the door to leave for work .
My mother shouted '' Lana won't you take breakfast?'' i replied '' you know I don't like eating in the morning.
what an odd girl my mother thought.