Hey, Kid.
You all as well, Folks.
I hope you all have been well out there in this massive, weird world of ours.
You want to know something?
I am done with having crushes, lol.
It sucks that the energy is never returned, you know?
It sucks, and in none of the GOOD ways.
Maybe something is wrong with me?
Maybe everyone is just far too damaged and scared.
Maybe we all are just better off alone, yeah?
Or maybe it's just me.
Maybe I am worthy of the love that comes with what I can do and provide for others.
No one seems to love me for ME.
Or at least very, very few people.
Our paraprofessional relationship is a sort of proof of this, lol.
It's okay.
I know what you all are here for, and I don't expect anything less.
You all have been amazing and loyal, and I love you dearly for that.
I will let you all get to what you are here for, yeah?
See you all back here soon enough.
Enjoy.
-----
September 28th, 2019.
-----
Dear You.
This year...has been VERY long, and not so great...
XXXXX's Dad passed.
She didn't like him much,
But she LOVED him.
I give you my word:
I will never do anything to make you hate me.
If I do, show me this.
I would hate to pass away with that hole in my heart.
I miss you, and you have yet to be born.
Maybe we will create you next year.
Maybe you will be born after we are married.
Lol.
That way, no one can ever call you a bastard, lol.
So tired...
I love you.
-Dad.
-----
Hmm.
-She hated her father. A lot.
Her words, not mine.
So I was quite perplexed when he passed away, and she was rather emotionally irate over it...
I mean, man. I had NEVER heard a single positive word about this human for as long as I had known her.
He passed, and suddenly, he was almost a saint.
It was quite confusing.
Sometimes people aren't missed until they are gone.
You know the crazier part?
Some really, REALLY shitty people are praised and loved after they die, even though they were hated in life.
Some really, REALLY good people are invisible to the world, and are even more so in death.
What a weird world...
Some of us do nothing but good, and it is never seen.
Some of us are super shitty, and it is praised.
What a weird, weird world...
-I don't think you will ever make it here, Kid.
I just...feel it.
I used to feel you, your energy floating around me.
In the Aether.
The space between.
The point where everything is, and nothing isn't.
I can't anymore.
It hurts.
You know?
I used to have so much hope for your arrival.
So much.
So much.
It has faded.
It has been drained.
I hate it, lbvs...
I wish you were born so very, very long ago.
Back when the light, the magic within me was so much more potent.
More...real.
Palpable.
You know?
I feel like you were stolen from me.
Like someone stole the time, and energy, and love that was required to create you.
Someone who didn't want any of that.
Someone who didn't want me.
Someone who didn't want you.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry that I didn't...
That I wasn't better.
That I didn't see the truth so much sooner.
Bah.
Maybe you exist, but you are just someone else's Little Light.
If that be it, then that's alright.
I can live with that.
At least you are here, Kid.
I hope your life is going well.
In any and all ways possible.
Don't mind me.
We just weren't meant to meet, you know?
That is also okay.
I love you regardless.
Maybe we will cross paths someday and lock eyes.
Maybe we will feel some weird spark.
A spark that comes with the love that lives between a child and their parent.
Maybe.
Maybe not.
Such is life.
I hope you all are doing well out there.
All of you Readers.
Parents.
Lovers.
Friends.
Kids.
We are all someone's Kid, right?
Safe travels, Folks.
You as well, Kid.
If you are a thing.
See you all soon enough.
As always:
Stay safe.
Stay healthy.
Stay vigilant.
-Redd.