Chapter 1: Resurrection, System Error, and Chicken Combat
The last thing I remembered before dying was… chicken.
Hot, crispy, glorious fried chicken. One final bite before the food truck exploded. Yes, exploded. Some poor gas line decision, a distracted driver, and my greedy hands reaching for an extra drumstick were enough to send me from the streets of Tokyo straight into oblivion.
And now, I was lying in the middle of a forest. Not a hospital. Not a white void. A real, muddy, pine-scented forest.
Was this reincarnation? I checked my body. Still human, still clothed (sort of), and thankfully, still alive.
Well, mostly.
> "Initializing System…"
A sudden blue screen popped into my vision, and I yelped. It hovered like a hologram.
> "Welcome, Host. You are the chosen wielder of—ERROR! ERROR! Unknown soul detected."
The screen glitched, then shattered like glass.
> "System rebooting… patching corrupted files…"
"…Oh no."
> "Host binding failed. Divine link unstable. Deploying emergency protocol…"
> "Welcome, Kai Ren. Your status: Bugged."
"…I figured."
> "Congratulations! You have been isekai'd into a system-based fantasy world with a terminally glitched interface and no manual!"
"…Wait, what?"
> "Initializing Goddess… Error. Goddess Manifestation: Fragmented."
Suddenly, a voice echoed in my head.
> "—about time someone woke me up."
A soft, ethereal voice. Feminine. Sharp.
"Who—?"
> "I'm Lyria. Technically, I'm your system goddess. Practically, I'm trapped in this broken mess with you."
My brain hurt.
"Okay. System. Goddess. Is this like those novels?"
> "Exactly like those novels. Except you got the bootleg version."
I sat up, dusted leaves off my clothes, and looked around. Birds chirped. The wind rustled the trees.
"So… what now?"
> "Survive. And maybe, just maybe, figure out why the divine server decided to throw you here."
---
The First Monster
I didn't have to wait long for trouble.
A growl.
Low. Hungry. Feral.
From the underbrush, a large wolf stepped out. Mangy fur. Red eyes. And it did not look friendly.
> "Good luck!" Lyria said. "You have… absolutely no weapons."
"…Seriously? No starter pack?"
> "Your glitch blocked item initialization."
"Can I punch it?"
> "Technically yes. Realistically? No."
I backed away slowly.
The wolf lunged.
I screamed.
Then something amazing happened.
My body moved on instinct. I dodged left. A sudden glow enveloped my hands. An object materialized—smooth, oval-shaped.
"…Is this an egg?"
> "Congratulations! Skill unlocked: Egg Barrage Lv. 1."
Before I could argue, my hands hurled glowing eggs at the wolf.
THWACK! THWACK! SPLAT!
The wolf skidded to a halt, howling as yolk and shell exploded against its fur. It shook, growled again, and lunged.
One more egg.
Right to the face.
CRACK!
The wolf collapsed, twitching.
> "Victory! You defeated your first monster with breakfast."
I stood panting. Hands shaking. Staring at the mess.
"Did I just… kill a wolf with eggs?"
> "Yes. And now your passive skill has evolved."
---
[Skill Acquired: Chicken Affinity Lv. 1]
> Passive: Chickens feel a deep spiritual connection to you.
"…That's not comforting."
> "Just wait until you meet them."
---
Chicken Encounter
I followed a faint dirt path, looking for civilization. Or water. Or therapy.
Then I heard it.
Cluck.
A pure white chicken stepped into my path. Its eyes met mine.
I stopped.
It bowed.
"…Lyria?"
> "Yep. That's your follower now."
"I HAVE A CHICKEN MINION?!"
> "More like a fanboy."
I named him Captain Cluckles.
He led me through a hidden path in the forest, pointing out edible mushrooms, avoiding traps, and occasionally clucking at wild rabbits to scare them away.
We reached the edge of a clearing.
A sign.
[Welcome to Nestwood Village — Population: Not Dead Yet]
Comforting.
---
Village Life (Or Something Like It)
Nestwood was… weird.
Chickens roamed freely. A man argued with a goose. Children chased each other with sticks shaped like swords.
I checked my system interface. Still glitching.
> "You need to stabilize your system. Find shrines. Relics. Something to anchor you here."
"Any leads?"
> "Nope. But there's a guild. Maybe they'll let you fight things until answers show up."
Great.
---
Adventurer's Guild
The building was large, wooden, and smelled like beer and blood. A sign read Adventurer's Hall – We Pay You to Fight Things.
Inside, a burly woman with the arms of a blacksmith and the glare of an angry mother stood behind the desk.
"Name?"
"Kai Ren."
"Class?"
"Egg Slinger."
A long pause.
Then laughter. From everyone.
I smiled awkwardly.
"…It's effective?"
She handed me a copper badge.
"Try not to die, Omelet Boy."
---
That Night
I lay on a straw bed in a cheap inn.
Captain Cluckles snored in the corner.
> "You did well," Lyria said, softer now.
"Thanks."
> "You're alive. That's rare for a bugged host."
I looked at the glitchy system overlay hovering above me.
"…Do you think we'll survive this?"
> "If you keep using egg puns, I might not let you."
I smiled.
We both fell silent.
And then, a flicker of golden light flashed across the screen.
[Divine Trace Detected… Error: Target Disguised… Location Corrupted]
> "They're searching for me," Lyria whispered. "And now they know about you."
"…Who are 'they'?"
> "Gods. Systems. Admins. The ones who want me gone. And now… you too."
I swallowed hard.
So. I was stuck in a glitched world, with a broken system, hunted by celestial beings…
And all I had were eggs.
But I wasn't alone.
I had a sarcastic goddess.
A loyal chicken.
And a burning will to fight back.
"Let's break their world," I whispered.
> "Now you're talking, Breakfast Mage."
---
[End of Chapter 1: Resurrection, System Error, and Chicken Combat]